HOT people

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I wonder if you need to be HOT yourself if you wish to date HOT people? I had a date with a HOT woman on Friday night and it appeared to go well. At the end of the night she asked me for a kiss and asked if I'd like to see her again. Good, eh? Since the date, she has become increasingly less communicative and basically doesn't return calls.

I wonder if by worshipping them, we give HOT people too much power, namely, the power to break our hearts.

Two questions you should ask yourself...

1) What is your definition of "hot", exactly?
2) What do you want out of your dates? A relationship, or something more casual?

I don't seek out HOT Women. I just want a "nice" girlfriend. This woman contacted me through plenty of fish. She just happens to be HOT. By HOT, I mean that I think many men my age would like to F**k her. Nice body, big Hooters, pleasaant face, fun personality. There in lies the rub, I think: She has a lot of Power.

Does attractive and hot mean the same thing?

I think that you should really take the focus off her being "HOT" as you say and look for a woman who pays you some respect...i.e. is as serious about dating as you are and actually calls you back or contacts you after with some follow-up. Also, it's likely not about her using power because she's "hot" and perhaps more so that she's not a good match as she may just like to go on dates casually (hence her kissing you at the end) or perhaps isn't sure about what she wants. You should go for someone who wants smiliar things you do.

Also, any girl with respect for herself would likely not appreciate being referred to as someone to f*** and having big "hooters"...even if you don't say this to their face, keep in mind that it makes women feel degraded and like you are just using them as an object...and as a woman myself, I know they do not want this at all, unless they are in a very unhealthy relationship. If you truly do want a girlfriend, you can NOT be viewing them in this manner or they will start resenting you. You need to figure out what you want from women personality-wise instead of focusing on their appearances. Most women want men who like them for who they are and not necessarily just what they look like.

Well... there is such a thing as supply and demand.

They say "Rich men and beautiful women never hear the truth".

Hot people (especially women) are in demand so they can make the other person jump through hoops and go through paces that a mediocre looking person cant.

So... pretend to be a casting director ( and rent Italian sports cars)... and keep on dating hot women. Or date average lookers and be yourself. Take your pick.

No disrespect intended for Women... just pointing out that this is a woman many men would desire and that gives her a lot of Personal Power when dating.

Or she might only have power over you and not all the other men you suspect she would have?

It could be that she likes you and she is afraid of that. Women that are used to being desired often have mixed feelings about a committed relationship, because they can't have men chase after them anymore. She sounds like (with my limited information) a flirt, so if you want to be with her, you need to keep chasing after her and show her that you want her and why. If you aren't willing to do that sort of thing (I'm sure not) then let this one go. Some women think of themselves as objects of desire.

^ Perhaps it's this. This woman may like the feeling of being chased after, as she does seem very flirty. But if you're seeking something more steady, this isn't going to work. I've been in a similar situation (with a guy, mind you, but I'm sure women can do this too), and trust me, if both of you don't want the same thing, you're going to end up hurt. When you start dating someone, make sure you ask the person what they want out of a future relationship if one develops.

I some how managed to get a date with a woman like this. But I couldn't keep up with the constant chasing that was required. I get tired and bored by this whole play and dance that I had to perform. When does it stop? Apparently never with this particular one. She just loved affection and she would try and get it from anyone, while I was there standing right next to her.

Be cool - if she's nice looking great but let her chase you a little too. listen to her. get to know her - not just her hooters!

First of all, turns out that I am a bit of a Jackass. It turns out on the day she wasn't returning calls, she had to go to the Hospital because of Chest Pains. It looks like it's OK, Angina, I think. She has to take Nitro pills.

I think this Woman is overwhelming me a bit because of the Triple-threat of Decent Personality, Good Looks and Hot Body. I almost feel as though "I'm not Worthy!" as Wayne and Garth would say. Another thing, as an Aspie I am getting a little obsessed. She has, for the time being, become a Special Interest.

I'm kind of worried that all this "Stuff" is going to show as a lack of confidence and that will be the Death knell for the possibility of forming a relationship.

Are you for real? Just be yourself for goodness sakes. Take some flowers to her and be kind - she's been through a lot with the hospital. Isn't angina a heart attack????? This is serious stuff. This is all about her - not you - keep it cool man!

I'm pretty far from hot but I've dated my share of hot guys in the past. My husband was pretty hot back in the day too. So, you don't have to be hot to date a hottie.

Although, some hotties just aren't worth it. The hottest guy I ever dated, Richard, wasn't. He was nice as could be too. Genuinely nice. Would do anything for you, polite, etc. Tall, black hair, dark brown eyes that you could just fall into when he looked at you, gorgeous face, worked out and had the best body I ever saw. Great shoulders and chest, hard flat abs, tight butt, strong legs. Olive skin. Dressed great. Beautiful straight white teeth. Rode a motorcycle. I don't remember what degree black belt in Kung Fu (not that chain store Karate for kids). Here's the problem, he was stupid.

When I say stupid, I don't mean that cute kind of stupid like Joey from Friends. I mean flat out dumb. He would say the stupidest stuff and it wasn't even funny or endearing or anything. He was the kind of stupid where I actually wouldn't let him talk around my friends. He could say "hey" or "nice to meet you" or something like that. He could make a few neutral comments, but that was it. Sometimes he would open his mouth and just embarrass the hell out of me by the stuff he would say.

Plus he would do stupid stuff. OK, he lived in Leeds which is a pretty good distance from West End in Bham where I lived. I was 17 and he was 18. He didn't have the gas to ride down to West End to see me every day or even a few times a week like he wanted to do, and he was in loooooove and wanted to see me all the time. I was in luuuuuuuust (at least at first, I'll get to that in a minute) so I was fine with him being there a lot. At first. Here's what he did. He brought a friend with him who also had a bike. This friend I was supposed to find dates for because he was stuck there too. They rented space in a tree in this guys back yard. They strung hammocks up in there and slept there every night. No s**t. He's sneak over to my house and shower every day. It was romantic and sweet, at first.

Then I found out that his friend was as dumb as he was and it became hard to find him dates, even though he was pretty hot too. All these guys talked about was Kung Fu and survivalist crap. And sometimes football. And stuff like that. Neither of them could make conversation. Around the time that I was getting tired of him (the guy I was dating, I was tired of the friend from day one) I thought well maybe I'll like him better if I sleep with him. Well, that pretty much did the whole relationship in. He was a virgin, and that was ok with me, but he had the smallest penis I've ever seen. I swear it was about the size of my index finger. I was only 17 and didn't sleep around, but still. That's entirely too small. Plus, he really sucked in the sack. Even after a few times.

The whole thing was hopeless after that. Cause on top of all that he had some kind of crazy OCD cleaning thing. Add that to the dumb factor to the can't talk about anything intersting factor to the sleeps in a tree factor, and the hotness and the motorcycle just wasn't enough to balance it out.

I've dated some hot ones that weren't like that too, but there was always something that bothered me more than their hotness could make up for. So, hot people aren't the be all and end all of everything. They are great to look at, but don't ever think they are the best.

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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
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