Organization and moving out on my own

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Hello all,

I am putting this in the in-depth category because I think you can help me best. The "getting a job" area doesn't seem like a good fit. Here I think people are older and will give great advice.

Anyway, I am 46 (at this time) and I have never been out on my own before. Dad died in January 2012, I still live with Mom.

My time management and organizational skills are really, really, really, really bad, and I am about to be on my own for the first time. I think it is 80 miles from the town I grew up. Mom can help with some things (if I forget to bring a microwave oven), but for other things I will be on my own (like if the car has a flat tire).

I need your help and advice.

Right now, I'm thinking about making lists and putting them on the refrigerator in my new apartment.

Lists of "stuff to do" each day.
Lists of groceries for easy-to-cook recipes.
Using the day-planner to AGRESSIVELY chart my time.
Use a computer spreadsheet to track expenses.

I am doing the same job at my company, but changing cities AND moving out on my own.

What tips can you give? Any help is GREATLY appreciated.

Hi!

I'm quite a bit younger than you (29) but I have been living alone since I was 17 and have fumbled through all of this as best I could. It took some time and a lot of stress along the way, but I managed.

Lists are good. Just try to keep the content of the lists as pointed and specific as possible. It's really easy to get caught up in minutia when you're making lists. Make too many about too many things and suddenly you have a fridge plastered with dozens of the things and you're overwhelmed.

So, for me it helps to prioritize. One list for 'must do today' and another for 'must do tomorrow'. Another for large things that need to be done in coming weeks, and another for things you'd like to get around to doing eventually but are not immediate concerns. Always work through the today and tomorrow lists first, and don't worry about the others until today and tomorrow are complete or mostly complete. You can then transfer over select items from 'coming weeks' list into today and tomorrow.

Since you recognize organization is tough for you, it might be good to set aside a particular part of your day, each day, just to look at the your to-do lists and get comfortable with the items you've written on them.

About the car: if you can afford it, I highly recommend signing up for a roadside assistance plan. In the US that is AMA and in Canada it's CAA. Most countries have an equivalent, I'm not sure where you live.

Good luck! And truth be told, living alone is not as difficult as it may seem. It just takes some time to adjust.

I just moved out on my own. I'm 28 and I am terrible at organization. I have a flip chart with a list of chores and responsibilities for each day on the coffee table where I am most likely to see it. I have a white board on my wall by my bed to write appointments or calls I need to make or bills I need to pay on so I see it as soon as I wake up. I have a daily schedule on the fridge of things that need to be done every day. I have a calendar that I put everything I need to remember on. I also have an accordion folder that I put daily notes or business cards or scraps in to be reviewed on a certain day of the week so I don't miss anything important. I have "prescription reminders" set up with the pharmacy so I remember to get my medication before it runs out. I have copies of a "pre-made" shopping list with check boxes beside each item so I can check off the items I need and I won't forget any because everything I need is on the list. I have post-it notes that I put on the bathroom mirror if I really need to remember something. I just schedule everything and use a timer if I'm going to read or research so I limit my hyperfocus time and I don't neglect other things that I need to do. And my reminders and flip book include EVERYTHING, even "wash the dishes", "feed the cats", "take a shower", "brush teeth". It's a bit strange at first, having to be the one with all the responsibility. I was really stressed out for the first month, but I'm starting to settle down now that 6 weeks have passed and I haven't killed my cats or burned down the apartment and I've been taking good enough care of myself.

I'm sorry that you are having to do this after a loss. Keep an eye on how you are feeling or changes in your behaviour that might indicate that you could use a bit of help. I see a counselor at the college once a month to make sure I'm doing OK. Don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it. If it is really difficult and you are really having a hard time taking care of everything there are options like case management or courses on organization.

I hope your move goes as smoothly as possible!