OCD Support Thread

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Forgive me, as I have already addressed this^, twice, previously, but, I just recalled something. I mentioned that this is what I experience, verbatim, but, I think I had misunderstood, as I put it into a specific context, while initially, reading your description, and after re reading it, again, it has occured to me that you are describing the very same phenomenon/experience I had, and spoke of, within your 'Reading Between The Lines' thread. I had one incident, whereby, I became hyper vigilant, to an extreme (I think I referred to it as paranoid or delusional), and what my therapist told me, is that my mind went into a state referred to, as, 'splitting'. I could not, effectively, process information I had taken in or realized, about a particular event that had occurred at the time, as it was too much for me to bear, and I had just gone through a similar event, the chemicals and neurons in my brain were rapid-firing, I had distorted, exaggerated, and somewhat delusional thoughts, and according to my therapist, who I was seeing at the time, 'splitting' occurred as a protection mechanism against a full blown, psychotic break. A psychotic break would have been the next step, I think. After I learned this, I did some research that literally, described exactly, what I experienced (I am going to try to find it, if I can trace back my steps). Thankfully, it had been my Mom, who took the brunt of my very off-kilter responses, when she told me I was having completely, irrational responses to the things she had said to me. I had reacted in a way that was brought on by a completely different incident. The reason it was said, not to be a psychotic break was because, I was in my mind, and aware of what was happening, while it was taking place, and I was simply in hyper vigilance overdrive, or, perhaps paranoia, as the result of an extreme amount of anxiety. In my research, I found a piece about a woman who wound up in the hospital as the result of what the doctor there, described as splitting, due to exposure to an event that her mind couldn't accept, if I am recalling, correctly. It, also turned out that she had severe PTSD, which, I do have PTSD from the incident that caused my, aforementioned, mental experience. Please forgive my sloppy/rambling explanation.

Yeah I need to my CBT homework before tomorrow but I'd rather be posting here

Yey! I survived. It wasn't that bad at all.

So much to catch on here , I will try to reply as soon as I can

How was your therapist visit, Ferris?

Glad to hear it went OK Ferris Hope that both of you are doing OK.

Thanks Boss , it's hard sharing all the hurt face to face with a therapist but we're doing O.K

I think I'd have very big problems with that too, but if it's helping you then great!

I didn't say it was helping

The actual therapy hasn't started , I'm still telling him my issues which has taken 2 hours so far and I'm still not finished

lol

Ok then I hope it will help!

Will getting a diagnosis help in any way? Or you're hoping that therapy will be of more use?

I won't be getting a diagnosis from the therapist so it better help . I have asked him questions which have just totally stumped him and he's looked confused as if no ones have ever asked questions like that and he'll get back to me on other questions , it makes me feel like I'm back in school where the teacher is only a a few lessons ahead on the syllabus
I am the type of person who needs labels for peace of mind so a diagnosis will be part of the healing process ? or just acceptance of why things are happening , even if they just tell me I'm a hypochondriac that would be enough.