Psychologist thinks I might have OCD. I don't get it.

Post Reply New Topic

I'm queueing to get assessed for AS and AD(H)D but in the meantime I've decided to see a psychologist about what I think is depression and anxiety (which makes life extremely hard for me). So today I saw a psychologist "for real" for the first time in my life. Talked to her for about 1 hour and 20 minutes. During the session she asked me questions and I did two screening tests (or whatever it's called). One for depression/anxiety and one for ADHD. The result on the ADHD-test wasn't conclusive or anything but apparently the other test shows I'm very "low" and anxious. The psychologist will probably refer me to someone who specialises in mood disorders and anxiety disorders.

Anyway, one thing the psychologist told me today was that she thinks I might have OCD. I'm not sure why she thinks so. I told her that people at university have commented on my need to straighten things out and have things in certain angles etc. She then asked me questions and I told her I always count steps when I walk up and down stairs, that I like to feel "even" (so if I for example get water on one hand I need to get water on the other hand as well to even things out, otherwise it feels uncomfortable) and things like that. But I don't think I have any obsessive thoughts. Or well, I have a lot of obsessive thoughts but no "classic" OCD thoughts (we didn't even talk about obsessive thoughts by the way). The psychologist said that people with OCD do these sort of routines/rituals to manage their anxiety and since I have a lot of anxiety and some rituals/compulsions that might be what I'm doing. She obviously didn't diagnose me or anything (a specialist will do that) so of course it's not sure I've got OCD but don't all people do these kinds of rituals (I do other things beside the ones I've mentioned by the way)? Is it really "abnormal"? I don't really get it.

Beware of the fact that OCD exists in many forms. I heard about an example of someone who had this very strong compulsive obsession with NOT being homosexual. She was very afraid of being lesbian, even though she has nothing against homosexuals. My boyfriend used to have severe OCD (which is now close to zero- thank god), fear of stain.

Are your ''traits'' that strong that if you won't be able to do your rituals, you'll have severe anxiety, or a panic attack, or feeling extremely uneasy? OCD can develop from general anxiety issues, so it may be true. Important is the way you feel and respond if you can't act to your habits and rituals.

Yeah, I guess there are different forms of OCD. The only ones I've heard a lot about are the washing compulsions, fear of germs, fear of hurting people or yourself and things like that.

I don't know what would happen if I didn't count steps. I count them automatically (at least so it seems) so I don't know. If I do something that makes me feel uneven and I don't do anything to even it out I feel very uncomfortable. I don't get anxious and get panic attacks or anything but it will bug me and I'll feel agitated until I "fix it". It'll annoy me. Do you know what I mean?

Routines and rigidity like that are also symptoms of AS, so...I'm not sure if you should let her diagnose you without her knowing whether you have AS. If you've never felt like this causes debilitating problems for you, I don't see the need to let her label you after one session. Then again, there are some Aspergians with OCD...you should wait longer, or get a second opinion, before she starts to treat you like this is a problem when you don't feel it is one.

Depression and anxiety are also common in people with AS or ADHD, so my personal opinion is to get evaluated for those first, so that you can work with somebody who's experienced in dealing with the unique problems that people like us have. If you don't have that luxury, then obviously just do whatever you feel is best for you.

(I meant, I know you got evaluated for ADHD already, but to pursue one or both of those diagnoses first. But you don't have to, of course. I once tried seeing a therapist, who also tried diagnosing me with something after the first session, and I just didn't feel like she understood the root of my problems. The above is a personal goal of mine recommended by other people I know on the spectrum, so I just thought I would pass it along.)

Last edited by Morningstar on 10 Oct 2012, 9:48 am, edited 1 time in total.

Well, she didn't diagnose me or anything. She won't. She'll refer me to a specialist. I won't be able to get assessed for AS and ADHD until 2014 or so (massive queues). So I'll have to take care of my anxiety issues etc first. Can't live like this for another two years. Not even sure I've got AS or ADHD. Might "just" be anxiety and depression (or whatever it is). I don't know. It's very difficult to figure out.

I know. I'm sorry. It's hard.

Queues?! My psychologist didn't even give me the option of getting properly evaluated...she asked me five questions and said "Nope, I highly doubt you have this."

I haven't really seen a psychologist about it yet (AS and ADHD that is). I referred myself (yes, it's possible). Having my first "talk" with a professional about AS and ADHD on the 22nd this month. After that and perhaps after a visit to the psychologist they'll determine if I should get an assessment or not. If they think I should get assessed, then it'll take about 2 years until I get it.

Obsessive-compulsive TENDENCIES are a lot different than Obsessive-Compulsive DISORDER. The media portrays OCD as being centered on the rituals and habits, but this is not true. The core of OCD is all about the obsessive thoughts and the great anxiety and panic that these thoughts induce. This is why pure obsessional OCD (what I have) is seldom talked about when describing OCD.

If you have obsessive-compulsive rituals/habits that you enjoy doing, this is not OCD. If you wish you didn't HAVE to do a compulsion, but you feel you must in order to make everything safe/in order/okay/"good/etc., THAT is stepping into true OCD territory. NOTHING about OCD is pleasurable. But AS habits/routines ARE fun and calming. I have both OCD and AS, and this is the best way to distinguish which of my OC traits are OCD and which are AS.

Thanks for explaining. All I can say is I'm looking forward to the day when I don't have to try to figure out what's going on inside my head. I want to be able to function in life.

I once asked what happens if someone likes checking their stoves, door locks like eight times or going up and down the stairs like five times or not stepping on cracks or having to step on cracks and as a joke, someone told me it's called Happy OCD.


I have even wondered what happens if an autistic person decided they didn't want routines anymore and structure but they couldn't help it because it's part of their autism, would it become OCD? What about if they decided they didn't like their obsessions because they were made me to ashamed of them or because they knew it was causing them problems so they decided to wish they didn't have them anymore, OCD now?

But what happens if they like their routines and don't like them at times or they like their obsessions but also wish they didn't have them? Would it be autism and OCD?

I have a friend that really has that Happy OCD problem. I remember that he once told me that at least he doesn't feel (anymore) bad about it.
EDIT: While he is doing the checking he doesn't care. That above text went a bit wrong
I think he is quite unhappy with that and I just feel so sorry for him.
I think it is not really that he could control it really and decide it away.
and I am just puzzled that he is doing so much better than me...

He has some aspie traits, but much less then I have, or maybe more ADHD (that's what he told me)

Anyway, I'd sometimes catch me checking things around if I just was "somewhere else", but I can easily let it be.
Then I'd forget also so many things, but I actually don't really care, unless it is important. Then I could even go into anxiety freak out. yes, unfortunately...

Or if I think I have done something stupid. Same thing, and even worse. My perception might really beat me up although sometimes it is nothing important really.
Then I'd do also really stupid things and completely loose my control.

Those are just periods though, fortunately, so far. I hope it will never get worse.
Well now I know about it at least and maybe just work it out

I have enough obsessions, that are however somehow under control through learning. Not very pleasent though if you'd have to suppress something that you'd really like to do, or feel would be right to do.

Obsessions are not that bad as long as you can control them. They are also the framework of your creativity

Compulsions are just the much worse part of that thing and I think they relate to anxiety and somehow also to stubbornness.
Afraid of having to change some general principles in yourself, afraid that something goes wrong
and still going the same direction because you can't help doing it.
Any kind of those feelings relate to OCD, I guess. I am not sure though.

Now that sounds really freaky that you would do things that you perceive yourself as wrongish
and that's why it is really unpleasant and scary (For me at least)

I have some kind of strange accepting some contradictions in my personality, feelings.
And I have some contradictory character traits.
I would accept to not always be right or uncertain.

I have both OCD and AS, diagnosed at the same time. OCD was a surprise to me, and that was mostly due to my being ignorant of what the disorder actually entails as opposed to my pop media broad strokes assumptions about it. What my pdoc calls 'OCD' is a combination of behaviours and thought processes I would previously have classified under general 'anxiety'.

To the original poster of this thread; there is one specific thing that will raise an OCD red flag for your pdoc. Self harm. History thereof. That is the thing that probably earned me the Dx. They ask about self harm, I explain the reasons why I find it cathartic, that it is often the only thing that can reset my brain so to speak, and calm down, stop worrying about the plethora of things I worry about. I don't know if this applies to you, but just wanted to explain that if you're curious why they think OCD is a possibility for you.

I self-harm by hitting myself in the head with my fists. I don't do it often and I only do it when I'm overloaded, when having a meltdown or when feeling extremely anxious. But why would that make them suspect OCD? People who don't have OCD self-harm as well.

It's the combination of repetitive thoughts or actions + self harm. Unwanted thoughts and use of self harm to stop them temporarily. Apparently that is classic indicator of the possibility of OCD. That is how my pdoc explained it to me. I'm not sure.

OCD is a very common co-morbidity. It shouldn't be THAT shocking if you get diagnosed with that AND an ASD. Keep in mind that OCD is also a spectrum from very mild quirks that are obvious parts of your life (but don't impact you negatively), to severely debilitating rituals that take over a person's entire life.