Gender identity- Trouble dealing with body shape change.

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Like many others on WP I identify with both genders. I was born female, but that is about where my association exclusively with this gender ends.

I have recently started a medication that has made me gain some weight very quickly. That is ok because I was pretty underweight. But I'm having trouble dealing with my new body shape. I look much more female. And my partner is commenting on this a lot.

I feel really uncomfortable about it all. I generally have very little awareness of my body - I'm always so in my head that my AS makes me feel like I don't even have a body

Usually I am ok to just exist as who I am, with no specific gender identity. But this has really thrown me. I feel like I'm walking around in someone else's body.

Dysphoria sucks. Have you considered binding your chest?

If it's hips (or chest for that matter) appearance that's bothering you, wearing baggy hoodies can definitely help.

I am thinking of stopping the medication. But then what? I spend the rest of my life underweight just so that I don't grow a chest?! I'm trying to counterweight it in my head by thinking "well know my arms and legs look bigger, so less girly". But it really isn't stopping the sense of panic and confusion I feel when I look down and see my chest.

Im really not sure. Do daily exercise to try and find a happy medium?

If you are eating healthily and you don't put on weight then perhaps thats just your natural shape, i have a fast metabolism, extreme ecto and i'm the same.

Perhaps you could embrace your new figure a little? You can always dress down and hide your figure if that makes you more comfortable, and that gives you both options.

I know what you mean about being unaware of your physical self. When I started taking estro therapy, though, I was happy to see the changes, and it was like the first time I really paid any attention to my body.