Meistersinger wrote:
Some would consider the clarinet, until they realize how screwed up you must be in order to play it. First, the entire weight of the instrument comes down on your right thumb. Second, the weakest finger on both hands, the pinkie, controls the stiffest levers on the horn. Third, the instrument is acoustically compromised. The air column of the instrument is a cylinder, instead of a cone, which makes it acoustically unstable. For example, if you play a middle c on a sex, a flute, an oboe, or a bassoon, and you open the register key, that note becomes a c one octave higher. Do the same on the clarinet, and that same middle c becomes a g on top of the treble clef. Why? The air column is a cylinder on the clarinet, while the other instruments listed, the air column is a cone. Finally, given the acoustic instability of a cylindrical air column, many compromises had to be made on the placement of tone holes on the clarinet, which means it can never be perfectly played in tune with the rest of the band or orchestra.
These are all problems HOW, exactly? Learn to voice upper-register notes in the mouth cavity and the throat and intonation is as flexible as a trombone (see "Rhapsody in Blue," any Dixieland player). I can do portamentos as wide as a perfect 5th in some places. Simple solution to intonation problems: Tune slightly sharp and/or use a harder reed. Adjust voicing to bend notes down as you go. And, come on guys, this is the 21st century. Catch up with the rest of the orchestra and start using vibrato! Incidentally, I typically use lip vibrato and adjust intonation in the throat. Technically you could do both in the throat, but I also like the timbre variation you get when changing pressure on the reed. Just my $.02.