read music?

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In my preteens I developed a fondness for music and eventually started trying to play the guitar
and have had a few basic lessons. I tried to learn how to read music but the entire process
eludes me. You would think I could remember where the dot on the line that relates to the
“A” note would be simple to recall. There is something about it I just can’t put a handle on.
I’ve also taken piano lessons but without the ability to read music it was pretty much a wasted effort.

The music that I can play on guitar comes from years of repetition and muscle memory training.
In other words, I have ZERO natural ability, just the music that I have struggled to learn can I
play well.

The stuff that I can play on piano is stuff I made up.

I have a similar problem with reading music. To me it just looks like a bunch of dots and lines that in no way relate to the sounds that music is made of, especially when trying to relate the dots and lines to an actual instrument.

I like music too, and have tried my hand at playing instruments. I can play songs or improvise on bass, guitar, piano, or anything really since I have some sort of aptitude for music. I'm pretty decent at playing them when I just play by ear, but when I try to read music I get confused and frustrated, then give up for a while.

I have always played music by ear. When I played saxophone in middle school I learned how to read music a little bit but I quit after a year or two. I don't remember anything about how to read music now. Playing guitar and banjo I just reference other songs, youtube videos of people playing, and look for lyrics with chords sometimes. I can't even stand video lessons online where they go note by note through a song.... I always change melodies and song structure around and don't really want a note by note breakdown of a song. Playing sheet music is a nice skill to have, but so is playing by ear... I just look at them as two different approaches to music, neither better or worse.

I can read, and even sight read a little (though since graduation I have not practiced sight reading at all, so I'm very rusty), but I prefer learning by memorization and by ear. I have trouble translating what I'm reading into what I'm playing.

I play bass, keyboard, bowed guitar and baritone ukulele btw. :)

Edit: redundant line is redundant.

I haven't read music in over 10 years. Once I learned how to play by ear, all of that went out the window.

I find reading music only useful if I want to get something precise, and since the only time I do that is when I'm playing stuff I've learned in my lessons, I wouldn't read music if I didn't have lessons. I write a lot on the computer though, using Finale