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being single at times drives me mad

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MikeInVa
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31 Jan 2008, 11:32 am

LVBen wrote:
MikeInVa wrote:
Ahh yes,that may be true in the animal kingdom but those "lower life forms" don't have to worry about the things we humans have invented such as money,cars,a nice place to live etc. Let's face it the first thing a girl is looking for in her potential mate is what's in his wallet(and I'm not talking about trojans here) as well as what's in his garage/driveway & if you don't have either of those things to start with,well then you're just SOL in the dating/mating game.



No, other animals don't have money or cars, but they have similar things. Some females birds look for the male with the best nest.

Most guys have two choices:
1. Work hard to acquire the things that many women want - money, muscles, fancy cars, education, power, etc. and then find a woman.
2. Be alone.

If a male can't appeal to females, then why shouldn't he be single?


Well now that my SSI claim has finally been approved I have at least removed one major obstacle from my path.



pbcoll
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31 Jan 2008, 12:51 pm

LVBen wrote:
koadah wrote:
If they would prefer an idiot with an ASBO why would you want them anyway?


That's the kind of attitude that makes very eligible people single. There is no such thing as a soul mate and there are no perfect people. In order to have any relationship, you have to put up with some things that you don't like! You have to figure out what you want in a mate and you have to be reasonable or you will be continue being single.


Yes, but there is also such a thing as having standards - i.e. you're not going to demand perfection, but you're not going to put up with the inevitable drama and conflict of relationships, the compromises associated with most of them (and certainly all live-in relationships), the effort needed to get into one, etc for someone you don't at least like. There are worse things in the world than being single (just look aorund, for crying out loud).


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Brittany2907
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31 Jan 2008, 12:53 pm

Starscream wrote:
being single as most peeps on here will know is more or less the way AS goes, to tell the truth i do swear that near enough all girls just seem to avoid me like the black death dispite me being polite(not in a coming on way) i swear it takes getting "knighted" with a ASBO to get girls even remotely intrested in ya in the UK, since it seems that most girls(in me area) just seem to go for total utter idiots, probs hence why me search for a girl as kinda gone up in smoke, i dont know i just seem doomed to being single for the rest of me days, plus i guess being a total geek makes finding a girl a pain also

sorry for the rant just needed to get something off me chest


It's true that in general, females seem to go for the loud, arrogant types of males these days...especially younger females [teens and those in their twenties]. The males who are genuine, but often quiet are rarely noticed. It's the sad fact of life.
There are the minority of females though, who do take a notice of the quiet and often eccentric males. Some of these females are just looking for a male to over-power, while the others will be generally interested in finding who the "man behind the mask" is and getting to know them further.
I have noticed that in quite a few threads it says that if a guy is unconfident/quiet, they are often put in the "just friends zone" by females. Maybe this is the case in your situation. Not that being friends is a bad thing...but maybe boosting your confidence and being a little more out-spoken will help your situation improve. I know that can't be changed over night...but it's indeed worth a try.


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D1nk0
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31 Jan 2008, 1:13 pm

Well I am certainly NOT an outgoing, sociable, friendly person I AM very aggressive, intense,loud, and could possibly be pecieved as arrogant(though I tell people Im not arrogant, but Proud). Ive noticed a LOT of women-especially the younger ones-are often intimidated by this. An aggressive man who is NOT socially adept seems to be someone they find very threatning.
I dont think that shy, quiet guys are viewed as being unattractive as much as they go unnoticed because they cant compete with the more boisterous, outgoing ones for attention.



LVBen
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31 Jan 2008, 2:28 pm

D1nk0 wrote:
Well I am certainly NOT an outgoing, sociable, friendly person I AM very aggressive, intense,loud, and could possibly be pecieved as arrogant(though I tell people Im not arrogant, but Proud). Ive noticed a LOT of women-especially the younger ones-are often intimidated by this. An aggressive man who is NOT socially adept seems to be someone they find very threatning.
I dont think that shy, quiet guys are viewed as being unattractive as much as they go unnoticed because they cant compete with the more boisterous, outgoing ones for attention.


If you if you do get noticed, but are perceived as arrogant, rude, eccentric, weird, etc., it is way better than not being noticed at all.

It's like the saying: "There is no such thing as bad publicity."



LVBen
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31 Jan 2008, 2:30 pm

MikeInVa wrote:
LVBen wrote:
MikeInVa wrote:
Ahh yes,that may be true in the animal kingdom but those "lower life forms" don't have to worry about the things we humans have invented such as money,cars,a nice place to live etc. Let's face it the first thing a girl is looking for in her potential mate is what's in his wallet(and I'm not talking about trojans here) as well as what's in his garage/driveway & if you don't have either of those things to start with,well then you're just SOL in the dating/mating game.



No, other animals don't have money or cars, but they have similar things. Some females birds look for the male with the best nest.

Most guys have two choices:
1. Work hard to acquire the things that many women want - money, muscles, fancy cars, education, power, etc. and then find a woman.
2. Be alone.

If a male can't appeal to females, then why shouldn't he be single?


Well now that my SSI claim has finally been approved I have at least removed one major obstacle from my path.


Congrats!



LVBen
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31 Jan 2008, 2:31 pm

pbcoll wrote:
LVBen wrote:
koadah wrote:
If they would prefer an idiot with an ASBO why would you want them anyway?


That's the kind of attitude that makes very eligible people single. There is no such thing as a soul mate and there are no perfect people. In order to have any relationship, you have to put up with some things that you don't like! You have to figure out what you want in a mate and you have to be reasonable or you will be continue being single.


Yes, but there is also such a thing as having standards - i.e. you're not going to demand perfection, but you're not going to put up with the inevitable drama and conflict of relationships, the compromises associated with most of them (and certainly all live-in relationships), the effort needed to get into one, etc for someone you don't at least like. There are worse things in the world than being single (just look aorund, for crying out loud).


Yeah, but come on... Are you really gonna not date a girl because of some loser she was with before you?



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04 Feb 2008, 6:57 pm

LVBen wrote:
Most guys have two choices:
1. Work hard to acquire the things that many women want - money, muscles, fancy cars, education, power, etc. and then find a woman.
Generally, social skills and emotional involvement come above those things to women. Wanted to note.



pbcoll
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04 Feb 2008, 7:01 pm

LVBen wrote:
pbcoll wrote:
LVBen wrote:
koadah wrote:
If they would prefer an idiot with an ASBO why would you want them anyway?


That's the kind of attitude that makes very eligible people single. There is no such thing as a soul mate and there are no perfect people. In order to have any relationship, you have to put up with some things that you don't like! You have to figure out what you want in a mate and you have to be reasonable or you will be continue being single.


Yes, but there is also such a thing as having standards - i.e. you're not going to demand perfection, but you're not going to put up with the inevitable drama and conflict of relationships, the compromises associated with most of them (and certainly all live-in relationships), the effort needed to get into one, etc for someone you don't at least like. There are worse things in the world than being single (just look aorund, for crying out loud).


Yeah, but come on... Are you really gonna not date a girl because of some loser she was with before you?


If he's bad enough to make me lose respect for her, yes.


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I am the steppenwolf that never learned to dance. (Sedaka)

El hombre es una bestia famélica, envidiosa e insaciable. (Francisco Tario)

I'm male by the way (yes, I know my avatar is misleading).