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Frustrated male NT in love with AS male

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shadexiii
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22 Sep 2007, 6:29 pm

ASfriend wrote:
I remember one time I held on a second too long, and he freaked out.

Is he not big on physical contact in general? Even hugs for me generally feel quite awkward, and I almost feel as if I'm forcing it for probably 4/5ths of the hugs I've gotten/given.

That could simply be a contact thing.

ASfriend wrote:
With him, I probably should just continue to be myself and not push the envelope. I just hope I don't regret that one day.

Well...now I'm going to have to go through the last couple minutes of every episode of Scrubs I can find. There was a quote in one of them that really applies...I just can't remember it or seem to find it using the normal methods. (Google.)

Has he been in a relationship before? Relationships can be a scary thing if you've never been in one.



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22 Sep 2007, 6:46 pm

No, he's not big on physical contact, but many times, he initiates the hug, not me.

In the 5+ years that I've known him, he's only been in 1 relationship, but he says he's had more. I know that one ended because the other guy felt like they were going nowhere and that my friend wasn't opening up to him.



shadexiii
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22 Sep 2007, 6:48 pm

ASfriend wrote:
No, he's not big on physical contact, but many times, he initiates the hug, not me.

Wow...then idunno.
ASfriend wrote:
In the 5+ years that I've known him, he's only been in 1 relationship, but he says he's had more. I know that one ended because the other guy felt like they were going nowhere and that my friend wasn't opening up to him.

Yeah...I really have no idea.



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23 Sep 2007, 4:24 pm

Thanks anyway -- really appreciate it!



Ticker
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23 Sep 2007, 5:36 pm

Are you totally sure he's even gay? I find some AS men are extremely passive. I can see a passive AS guy just hanging out with gay men because they are not as judgemental as NT straight men. Perhaps your suggestions to have a relationship are ignored because he doesn't know how to tell you he isn't gay. Or maybe he's not sure if he is gay, bi or straight and has just found himself in friendships with gay men because he does want friends. The hugging from him is easily understood as many Aspies crave hugs as we usually live/grow up with little affection given to us.

PS: If you know of any nice NT females wanting a relationship with a AS female would appreciate getting introduced to them. :)



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23 Sep 2007, 7:25 pm

Yes, I know that he's gay. He's not out, and doesn't like to talk about it, but yes, I know he's gay.



Thelostcup
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23 Sep 2007, 10:14 pm

He probably isn't even gay.



shadexiii
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23 Sep 2007, 10:50 pm

Thelostcup wrote:
He probably isn't even gay.

Wow. You really suck at trolling. :lol:



Thelostcup
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23 Sep 2007, 11:37 pm

shadexiii wrote:
Thelostcup wrote:
He probably isn't even gay.

Wow. You really suck at trolling. :lol:


I was just stating my opinion.

If it were a troll post it would be more cryptic, and inflammatory.

But simple tactics do sometimes work on forums full of dumbasses.
This isn't one of them.



shadexiii
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24 Sep 2007, 1:42 am

Thelostcup wrote:
I was just stating my opinion.

If you say so. ;)
Thelostcup wrote:
If it were a troll post it would be more cryptic, and inflammatory.

But simple tactics do sometimes work on forums full of dumbasses.
This isn't one of them.

After all...you are the "veteran." :lol: