Do you date people you're not attracted to?

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I know this kind of subject has been talked about before, but it's something I find really interesting. A friend of mine just started dating this girl. He's been telling me how great she is and all that and he finally got some pictures of her and showed them to me. My first thought was kind of astonishment on how non-attractive she was (to me). She wasn't ugly by any means, I just didn't find her attractive. If her and I had been at the same social event, I wouldn't have given her a second look, let alone muster up the will to talk to her.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not just about physical appearance. If there was a plain/unattractive woman that I knew really well and knew she was a good person with a good personality and we clicked on numerous levels than yeah, I'd probably be asking her out. However, if I'd been at a social event with this person, she'd be a stranger and the only thing I would know about her is that I'm not attracted to her, why would I ask her out? I'm trying to understand this level of interaction. Now, maybe my friend did think she was attractive when he first saw her. I don't see how, but I suppose there are women I'd find attractive that other people would not.

I'm trying to determine if, for me, it's maybe an Aspie thing. I see guys going out with women who I'm sure are really nice, but the though of hugging them kind of makes my skin crawl. I'm honestly baffled.

uh....beauty is in the eye of the beholder.... ???

and...I have dated a couple of people in my lifetime who I was not physically compatible with....but I tend to be attracted to the people I date...granted, maybe it is kinda different for some females...HOPEFully, there are some males who feel the same way......for me appearances are secondary. I am attracted to people for other reasons than their outright physical appearance, and if I am attracted to them, THEN i will find them physically attractive no matter how they might measure up to "conventional standards" I don't care if a guy is bald, overweight, underweight, tall...short...there will be something beyond that that I am attracted to, and from that, I will find them physically attractive...just because I am attracted to them as a person

For me, a person's personality works like beer goggles – even if I can tell they're not all that physically attractive, they'll look more attractive to me if they're nice, funny, intelligent, etc. And if they're physically gorgeous, they'll seem repulsive to me if they're a**holes. And since I rarely make eye contact with people, it's not like I'm looking at them much anyway. There has to be some kind of romantic spark. I dated a guy once and there was no spark whatsoever, and despite his obviously good looks (he was actually a model at one point, no joke), I was just bored when we were together.

I'm too honest. Thus, I can't date someone I'm not attracted to.

Nope, apparently knowing how Sex laws are getting extremely strict, and well we know that anyone who has any form of Autism are bound to have major restrictions, and usually that depends if the same person as the same disorder, or something more on the lines of Autism would have a better chance to have a relationship with you, and anyone who is Normal Functioning would be restricted to older than 32 years old due to experience with people that have any form Autism, me being included in this,

Thought I wanted to add a more insider prospective on it since I am 27 years old, but not allowed or any females like from the 18 to 24, which in turn I'd have to look to 30 or older due to this reason of Experince.

My interpretation of the original post seemed to be on a basis of looks alone..or perhaps the "vibe" that these people exuded from pictures of them or superficial meetings without getting to know them...could be wrong, but that was the impression I got..

I've dated a few women that I wasn't really attracted to. Most were "Blind" and/or "Mercy" dates. I grew to be attracted to a few of them, but for the most part, there were severe social issues on their parts that discouraged any further dating - and with me being an Aspie, that might give you some referent for just how severe their social issues were.

I would rather not date someone who is not at least somewhat attracted to me physically. Since I am not a supermodel, I would need someone with a slightly open mind who does not mind that I am short and in my 30's and not a 22 year old ectomorph....I hate the notion of dating someone who might regard dating me as "slumming it" because I do not meet their ideal physical standards. It sucks that most men have to be so stinking "visual"....

I am very homely in comparison to all of my boyfriend's exes...and I can sorta tell based on who I see him look at that he likes girls who are tall blonde and slender....but who doesn't....I guess....


It was similar with my last boyfriend....

No. In fact, I've turned down at least two opportunities because I wasn't interested. Actually, I didn't do anything to convince them to give up: just being my usual self was enough to demonstrate my lack of interest. And that is terrible.