Suddenly alone- partner dead

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My husband died suddenly on vacation.

This is really strange. ince I am the breadwinner and he was the homemaker - in a sense nothing has changed except that I'm alone and need to stay connected with the non cyber world -not something Aspie's are known for

I have made a list of skills to learn, people to stay connected to, etc. I also need daycare for my dogs and to hire a housekeeper.

Will I ever love again? I'm only 46 and in great shape. How when do I look for relationships? between Tom's death and when I came home two people hit on me so I'm apparently still attractive. The first one I just got really mad and thought about a skip kick followed by an uppercut (Kick boxing is a hobby). Fortunatly my little brother stepped in.

Why not post a pic? You might find someone here - not all the men are desperate saddos.

How very sad. Sorry to hear of your husband's death.
The question of how long you grieve, and how long before you start dating again can only be answered by you, according to your heart. It's a very difficult situation, and I wish you well. As for the previous post, if you want to meet ASpie guys, there's plenty on this site.
As for dating these days, well ....

I don’t see online life as a substitute, real life. For a Aspie I am quite an offliner, the original reason for using these forums is to research into Asperger Syndrome.

Julie, sorry to hear about that .

I think at least in being here you can talk to us about stuff but I still have to agree with a lot of people here, cyberlife is a supplement but by no means a substitute. I hope you do find someone IRL or at the very least learn to be happy again with single life - sounds like your very self-sufficient and strong in yourself, as I try to be. If anything you might want to shoot for some of your own personal dreams and achievements you've wanted to make but which your relationship in the past may have held you up on a bit, take at little bit of you time before falling head-over-heels again because even if that delays things a couple years you'll still be much happier that you did it in the end (unless you really meet someone who's your soulmate or pretty close to it, in that event I'd say go for it).

Awww, I'm sorry to hear about that.

I hope things get better for you.

I'm so sorry... You need to mourn your husbands death before you go looking for another partner though, it's the only advice I can give.

Remember time does heal eventually, when you do eventually find someone else in your, believe that your husband wants you to be happy, find someone to make him proud, find the perfect man in his honour.

You seem alittle calm for someone whose husband just died? and suddenly? I don't know that I'd be so relaxed if my wife keeled over on vacation. You're not kidding right? Part of me can't even believe you'd post about such a thing on a forum, it's so personal exactly what do you think it will accomplish? Surely people near you would be better to talk with, and ummm you're already worried about finding another guy? Kinda strange : scared :

I'm so sorry. Give yourself more time, you don't sound ready at all to be in a relationship. Look for friendship only, is my suggestion, between either gender. If you can stomach going to church, try that.

Don't look for friendship from a guy, they can't be friends with a girl. We'll just try taking you into your bedroom when you're crying, then take you into loving.

Julie... that really sucks. I'm sorry.

Exaggerate and distort much? Yes, some guys are like that, but not all.

I have had non-sexual friendships with men.

Most of my friends are guys. Surely they can't all be trying to get into my pants? (Especially not the one who says how much like his sister I am...)

Nothing surprises me.

Just depends how things start out. One way that can happen is if the girl is one of the guy's close friend's ex's, in that case they were friends before and got to know each other from the word go on that basis so nothing feels unnatural about it. The other way is if they met under circumstances where things were an instant spark-kill, like a situation that demanded too much formality or had them respecting each other more than feeling attraction, in that respect you could have 2 people who'd otherwise possibly have an interest just end up being friends because what would have been that spark just manifests in a different way (and yeah, either side may feel things like they wanna do something about it but feel like it would be inappropriate to the nature and basis of how they know each other).