No friends, but constantly having guys "wanting" me

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How about if he’s a great guy who happens to be 45?

No doubt there are plenty of people in this world that would love to bask in your presence. Past experience has only served to make your opinion biased towards negative outcomes. I get that you have been hurt a lot and perhaps getting hurt again makes it easy to stop looking and keeping an open mind to this idea.

As long he's not 37-38 ; Sharon got the impression that I am somehow "interested" in the OP. I am not, I pass.

Resumes don’t show attitude neither do dating profiles what it does show is I don’t own a car, i don’t own a homes, and I don’t work a real job. All which most women see as unacceptable for a relationship. My personality or Attitude is irrelevant as those aren’t even seen until you message or meet up which they never do with me cause of the above.

We are different people for me and many there isn’t life beyond significant other relationships. I’m glad your happy and content being alone forever but you must realize that not everyone is like you. Humans need social relationship to be content. Some people like you don’t and prefer to be alone. I’m a social human.
As scrubs said “ humans aren’t meant to be alone.” Humans like need to be in groups it’s why we beat out the neanderthals who preferred to either be alone or in tiny groups.

Why not? Cause her statement about 10%?

I’d date her if given chance, it might not work out but that’s the point of dating.
But she probably wouldn’t see me as good enough so I wouldn’t try, I wouldn’t be friends with her in person but could be text friends. Such friendships meet limited needs though.

I couldn’t be in person friends with single attractive female. And it doesn’t work the other way either as I found out.

Another thing I’ve noticed about women vs men thst makes it hard to being friends with women is women constantly mention their bf while hanging out, guys don’t
If they do it’s to gloat about sex with them. For most part when I hang with guys we just do the activity or talk about politics, guns, sports(meh), video games or cars(meh).
With women they always mention their bf. I think maybe it’s so I know I’m not got a chance with them but even long time female gamer friends do it. All it does is make me feel like crap. I know I’m single forever Ever and never going to have what they have, I use video games and other activities to distract from it, so I don’t want to hear how great their bf is how how wonderful their relationship or is how great the sex with him is.

So I prefer female friends via tex to share my emotional side and issues with by male friends for hanging out with.

No no no, it has nothing to do with what she said; I simply have no such interest in forum members on the other side of the planet. Nothing personal.

Hi LunaticCentruroides

I would imagine you are the "mix" like me (ASD + ADD/ADHD). We are the "drones" of the human race (according to my theory). Unlike many aspies, we are HIGHLY interactive with people.

I have had the same experience with women. Fortunately for me being a guy, most women are subtle... so I can generally ignore it until it all blows up (maybe not THAT fortunately). Don't get me started on the women who think I am way too into them! Evidently... "I flirt"... news to me.

It is truly a curse though because I want platonic female friends! I feel uncomfortable around most men. I remember hearing some guy complaining about being in the "friend zone" with women. I said... "that would be so awesome!". He gave me that uncomfortable look that means I said something wrong.

I truly understand how you feel. My only advice would be to set up front boundaries and communicate clearly what you want (although NT people tell so many (white?) lies, they may not believe you). You may be able to find asexual men who want nothing to do with sex. I have one good lesbian friend

It is deeply unfulfilling to invest heart and trust in a person only to find out they have an agenda

Last edited by Chain on 20 Jun 2020, 6:05 pm, edited 2 times in total.

I always liked older men.

Ironically, now that I'm older myself, I keep meeting guys in their mid to late 20s and there are no single men my age around as far as the eye can see. I work in IT as well. You'd think there would be some single guys in their late 30s at our meetups... Nope.

I met an ideal guy for me recently, apart from one thing... He's 25. I flirted with him for a bit and didn't tell him how old I am, but I haven't persued anything. I'm sure he thinks I'm younger than I am.

Ideal guy?

Yeah, he's pretty laid back and very positive.

In contrast to a couple of guys I got to know over the past few years who you never knew where you stood with them. Like you could say the wrong thing at any time and that was tiring.

I can't be bothered with folks you have to walk on eggshells round.

He's easy to talk to as well. Just really easy-going, but has standards too. It's an ideal balance.

He lives with his parents and has no job now due to the covid-19 situation and doesn't drive btw. We have good transport links in the city and he mostly cycles places.

I suspect he may be laid back enough not to care that i own my house and not be intimidated by my job. Last guy seemed to resent my level of "success" like it was an affront to his masculinity.

But I'm still old, so this is all moot.

Perhaps you should find a way to see how he feels about age. Don't sell yourself short, hope it works out.

You are a lovely unique person.
I wish you all the best in your "Man-friend Hunting".

I agree.
It is my personal belief that the age difference of 10 years and under is a good match.
But there are exceptions to this rule.

I would be interested if I was 30 years younger and not a committed bachelor.
She has a fascinating approach to life.

Most women that do this do so to show they are not available, yes, based on my experience.
I have had this done to me quite a few times also, despite the fact I wasn't interested in a relationship.
I was simply being open and honest.
It is annoying, but it is understandable.