My ex-Wife's Big Date (Rant)

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Oh, I do actually think the internet is a good tool to cast a wider net, as you say. I have actually managed to meet some genuinely nice and attractive guys, but it wasn't easy, either. I'd say you shouldn't get down about it if you aren't succeeding as fast as your ex wife is just based on what I said. At least from what I can tell you're genuine and don't have an immediate air of pomposity. Seriously, keep trying, I think you could have a surprising future ahead.

It was a strange fate that brought me to the relationship I'm in now, and it has been the most intense, life altering experience I've been through thus far. My suggestion is to not try too hard -- the harder you try, the more you're likely to miss out on the deeper undercurrent of what connects you to others. Hopefully that makes sense.

Been there, done that. After my divorce I found it wasn't as hard to meet women as I thought it would be. Mostly through the internet and IRL also. I found that many women in their 30's and 40's get tired of the NT man's beer and sports mentality and seek out the qualities that make AS men unique.

Thanks so much Orbyss, that really is encouraging.

One thought regarding "pomposity" - I tend to use precise, somewhat formal speech unless I make a deliberate effort not to.

Sometimes this might be misinterpreted as "pomposity", but it really isn't - it's just my default way of communicating.

I'm actually very self-conscious about it, so I had to mention it

Thanks again!

I agree with the others - don't beat yourself up about not having successful internet dating.

It's always very easy for a woman to get a date from places like those, even when she isn't young and attractive like your ex wife. It's hard not to compare, I know, but you just need to tell yourself it's not because of who you are its the fact she has a HUGE advantage because of her gender - and, obviously, her appearance as men are so driven on looks.

I've not actually tried it yet - I'm not ready.

I think when I can actually go out with someone without mentally comparing them to my ex-wife, then I'll be ready.

I've heard that some people have "rebound" relationships to help them get over it, but maybe that's just something I saw in a "Chick Flick" - and I'll be damned if I let Drew Barrymore run my life!

Thanks so much for the reply!

It's really nothing more than being female and online. Any women will get 10-50 times as many responses as any man. Of course, most of those guys are married, just as most the responses men get are from bots or professionals of one sort of another.

The only part of society I've seen where women ask first is Square Dancing.