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Age appropriate behavior? (break from another thread)

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mikkyh
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28 Jan 2010, 1:41 pm

elderwanda wrote:
makuranososhi wrote:
Meadow wrote:
Lecks wrote:
Meadow wrote:
A sixteen year old is a child. A twenty year old is an adult. There shouldn't be any confusion there.

Mental maturity doesn't abide by one's age and both are physically mature enough to have sexual relations.


That isn't for you or I to say, with regard to maturity in said case. The law is the law and it should be adhered to. Sixteen years old's are not mature enough for such activity. My mother was seventeen when she gave birth to me. She wasn't mature enough, prepared or ready for that situation, even though she was capable of and willing to have sex.


*shakes head* I'm sorry, but it appears you're confused on a few counts. The law where you are is not the same as the law where I am, or the laws in various states in America, nations in Europe, countries in across the continents. Some states allow (or have in the past couple decades) ages of consent of 15; some countries consider girls younger than that to be mature enough for a sexual relationship. My opinion, your opinion - neither matter in the fact that such a relationship IS legal in many parts of the world. Second, your mother's experience is not the only experience in the world. Many people aren't prepared to be parents at 17; many people aren't prepared to be parents at 37. Coincidence does not equate to causality. Lastly, it isn't up to you to judge how other people live their lives. Personally, I think we as a society and species lose entirely too much time spent in the interest of the status and methods of the lives of others.




M.


Also, last I checked, fondling someone's breast doesn't get them pregnant.


It can be considered as foreplay...and foreplay normally leads to sex.

Anyway. This is going off topic and is somewhat nonconstructive, so can we please put this particular discussion at an end ? We're all entitled to our own opinions. *shakes head* is implying a very dismissive attitude to other people's opinions.


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makuranososhi
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28 Jan 2010, 1:46 pm

Meadow, shaking one's head in disbelief isn't being mocking or condescending - in this case, it actually represents an actual physical characteristic or 'tell' for me, one that always has given me away with my students... when I am in a state of disbelief, whether positive or negative, I shake my head to the side while generally cocked at an angle. Please calm down.

Elderwanda, that's a very good point.

mikkyh, disbelief isn't dismissive - I can have a hard time fathoming the opinions of another without dismissing them.


M.


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Meadow
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28 Jan 2010, 1:56 pm

makuranososhi wrote:
Meadow, shaking one's head in disbelief isn't being mocking or condescending - in this case, it actually represents an actual physical characteristic or 'tell' for me, one that always has given me away with my students... when I am in a state of disbelief, whether positive or negative, I shake my head to the side while generally cocked at an angle. Please calm down.

Elderwanda, that's a very good point.

mikkyh, disbelief isn't dismissive - I can have a hard time fathoming the opinions of another without dismissing them.


M.


Makuranoshoshi, I'm not sure what makes you think I am not "calm". Being female does not make me a histrionic if you are confused. I experience equal disbelief in association with your moral values but I didn't *shake my head* at you as a means to ridicule or mock you for it, and left you to think and believe as you so wish or choose. I'd just ask that you do the same on my account.



makuranososhi
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28 Jan 2010, 2:17 pm

No, I am not implying that you are histrionic or hysterical, or that your reaction is based upon gender. My reference to calming down was to this specific situation, however - that it appears you are leaping to assumptions, and I am unable to follow how you are arriving at them.

Shaking my head is a form of self-expression, and does not denote any sort of slight, insult, derision or attack towards you or anyone else. Doing so does not impair your ability to respond, or inflict damage upon your beliefs. I'm sorry if you interpret it as such; while I will try to be aware, it is also an element of who I am and how I express myself and will remain as such.


M.


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28 Jan 2010, 2:36 pm

Nowhere did I suggest that I felt I was being attacked.
Keep in mind that such a gesture is rather condescending.



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28 Jan 2010, 2:36 pm

:roll: @ Where this is going... not at anyone.

I thought this thread was about telling other people they aren't autistic after reading their forum posts... :shrug:



Last edited by j0sh on 28 Jan 2010, 2:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.

makuranososhi
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28 Jan 2010, 2:37 pm

j0sh wrote:
:roll: I thought this thread was about telling other people they aren't autistic after reading their forum posts... :shrug:


Good call.


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28 Jan 2010, 3:58 pm

This is why many governments enact close in age exemptions. Personally, I see nothing wrong with a 20 year old and a 16 year old. But on the other hand, something like a 25 year old and a 16 year old is a sign of something wrong.

However, age is commonly the most targeted culprit for a greater problem: that of a relationship that is exploitative. Such relationships exist wherever there is a vulnerable party, regardless of age. Some of these are covered by other laws: The boss who forces that woman working under him to have sex with him to keep her job or advance would be covered by sexual harassment laws, but only if the vulnerable party steps forward and says as much. But the fact remains that the laws shouldn't target relationships based on arbitrary attributes such as age, but rather whether a relationship is truly consensual with no coercion involved on the part of either partner. That's why I see nothing wrong with a 20 year old having sex with a 16 year old, provided one wasn't taking advantage of the other (and, to be honest, i've seen scenarios where the younger partner takes advantage of the older one, so it easily goes both ways)