How do you behave/react when you have a 'crush'?
I can't argue with that.
Hmm...I have another idea....How about if I just change my signature to something like "Hey gals, I'm a chickenshit so i probably won't ever ask you out, so if you're interested, contact me first, and then if we hit it off there's a good chance we'll fall in love, and we'll both get laid." Classy, eh? *is a budding Casanova*
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Those who speak, don't know.
Those who know, don't speak.
I can't argue with that.
Hmm...I have another idea....How about if I just change my signature to something like "Hey gals, I'm a chickenshit so i probably won't ever ask you out, so if you're interested, contact me first, and then if we hit it off there's a good chance we'll fall in love, and we'll both get laid." Classy, eh? *is a budding Casanova*
What if getting laid is not on the agenda?
HopeGrows
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Joined: 5 Nov 2009
Age: 52
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,565
Location: In exactly the right place at exactly the right time.
Hmm...I have another idea....How about if I just change my signature to something like "Hey gals, I'm a chickenshit so i probably won't ever ask you out, so if you're interested, contact me first, and then if we hit it off there's a good chance we'll fall in love, and we'll both get laid." Classy, eh? *is a budding Casanova*
Hmmm.....are you sure the signature isn't too subtle? Don't sugar-coat it stud, tell the ladies what's in for them....how about, "Hey Ladies, interested in hour long orgasms and near slave-like devotion - all on super convenient Eastern Standard Time?"
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What you feel is what you are and what you are is beautiful...
I can't argue with that.
Hmm...I have another idea....How about if I just change my signature to something like "Hey gals, I'm a chickenshit so i probably won't ever ask you out, so if you're interested, contact me first, and then if we hit it off there's a good chance we'll fall in love, and we'll both get laid." Classy, eh? *is a budding Casanova*
What if getting laid is not on the agenda?
Hmmm, well....you probably wouldn't get as many replies as i would, because gals like sex too.
_________________
Those who speak, don't know.
Those who know, don't speak.
HopeGrows
Veteran
Joined: 5 Nov 2009
Age: 52
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,565
Location: In exactly the right place at exactly the right time.
Sorry, dude....I wish you would have said, "....because gals like the sex too." It's late and I'm a little punchy, but I swear I'm cracking myself up.
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What you feel is what you are and what you are is beautiful...
I'm a bit obsessive about my limerince as well. I find its usually the voice more then anything that draws me in, I just find certain tones intoxicating. Which makes it all the more terrifying to talk to whoever said person is.
My immediate desire is to obtain more information and yet on another level I'm just sort of afraid of finding out this person is quite normal and as a result would find me and my inordinately focused life boring.
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I am autism.
the last 3 letters read backward read, "ash"
& re-utilizing the "h" (which seems like a hinge letter)...
the first five letters complete it with "leigh"
to make the name "Ashleigh"
unless "leighsa" is an odd spelling of "lisa" or an entirely unique name altogether.
or, even possibly a completely random letter combo
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+Blog: http://itsdeeperthanyouknow.blogspot.com/
+"Beneath all chaos lies perfect order"
it's one of the more annoying traits
it seems like when i'm talking with my girlfriend i'm constantly at war with myself trying to keep that regulated and not act too pathetically lovey; Suppressing my deeply ingrained need to please.
i constantly worry that i'll end up f*****g myself over one of these days, & end up coming off as obsessive or clingy & end up scaring her off
.
& the fact that things are actually going really well at the moment has me decidedly uneasy, but somewhat relieved.
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+Blog: http://itsdeeperthanyouknow.blogspot.com/
+"Beneath all chaos lies perfect order"
What are your experiences with 'crushing'?
The object of my limerence is an Aspie on the other side of the World, in Finland maybe. He's hijacked my BlackBerry, controls my Internet access, hears all my calls, reads all my emails and I adore him.
I also become eager to see anything the person in question creates. Examples include writing, pictures, and the results of various kinds of editing software, but I also enjoy listening to long, loosely coherent rants. (Especially when submitted in text, so that I can give it proper attention.)
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I can make a statement true by placing it first in this signature.
"Everyone loves the dolphin. A bitter shark - emerging from it's cold depths - doesn't stand a chance." This is hyperbol.
"Run, Jump, Fall, Limp off, Try Harder."
I used to do this, but have (I think successfully) kept it in check for the past few years. I've become more mindful of it anyway, and would readily date maybe half of my female peers rather than just a few like in my mid-teens. I'm a fairly cautious person, though, so I tend not to be too overt about my interest - for one thing, a lot of socially able people can disguise overt interest in half-jokes as part of a fun and carefree personality, and I don't think I could get away with that.
I crawl deeper in my shell because as soon as I catch myself having a crush on someone I imagine getting shot down in front of a large group of people.
So I avoid any place I might run into her or, if avoiding is impossible, I do my best ninja act and hide from her.
Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on perspective, every woman I've had a crush on was in a relationship and I immediately lose interest (at least emotionally) when I know she's unavailable.
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Chances are, if you're offended by something I said, it was an attempt at humour.
What are your experiences with 'crushing'?
I become obsessive but detached.
It's hard for me to establish a relationship once the boundaries have been crossed. I think part of it is the fear of rejection or not living up to what that person expected of me from an external point of view.
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I live as I choose or I will not live at all.
~Delores O’Riordan
I think this gets into a larger relationship phobia, at least for myself. I reconnected by letter with mine and he wrote back immediately with what I thought was a very romantic letter (without actually stating an interest). My reaction? Total panic. So I wrote back something non -committal and I didn't hear from him for 5 years until this last Christmas Eve when he showed up at my door. He lives in the town I used to but his sister lives here. Anyway big bear hug, nice visit, told me I was wonderful, kissed me and left. I'll probably see him again in a few years.
Some may say the obsession is keeping me from another possible connection, but the fact is, I'm really not looking. If someone right comes along then that's different. When I came across WP after already researching autism for 6 years and I saw myself time and time again; it hit me like a ton of bricks that my ineptness with relationships was there for a reason and there was no reason to think they would magically disappear, right guy or not. Oh and those five years? Four of those were almost completely consumed with intrusive thoughts of him. I'm pretty much over it now, but I still think he's awesome.
My experiences with falling in love have followed much the same pattern throughout my life.
I fall in love with a woman whom I obsess over for years. What I find frustrating and I would like to hear other people's thoughts on this, is that if the woman in question begins to seem attracted to me, I immediately start to find fault with her. She isn't as smart as I had assumed or she has bad taste in literature or she isn't quite as beautiful as I had remembered.
This has happened in a few cases throughout my life and I find it surprising just how predictable it is. It seems to me that this is a method I use to avoid the very real anxiety that comes with negotiating intimacy.
I am a self diagnosed Aspie and mostly I feel it is relatively mild. At any rate, I suspect I pass for normal so long as I am not dealing with strangers or women I am greatly attracted to. But where I seem to go a bit overboard with the standard Aspie symptoms is in anything that remotely resembles dating and intimacy.
I have not yet found a way to avoid finding reasons not to take the emotional risks of love and friendship. The result is that, despite the fact that a lot of the more annoying Aspie symptoms have eased with age, I still find myself growing more and more isolated. I'm good at analyzing a situation and proposing solutions, but this is one I haven't been able to solve.
