People who worry nothing happens for them in highschool?

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Yeah, I didn't get my first kiss until I was 19 at college and didn't lose the virginity until last november. You don't have to be a party animal for these things to happen either. I hung out with the anime club and renaissance club kids and that's all the action I needed. Nerdy guys = yes ma'am.

On the other hand, if you graduate college as a virgin, and you're not exactly making any effort to "save it" for "the right person" or marriage or what not... then you're a loser. Like me...

Actually that's common too.

I'm not talking about those that choose to not try it... i'm talking about the people like me that dont have the choice to make.

I'm the same Toad except I'm 28 & didn't go to college but spent about 38months working & I do NOT think it makes me a loser & I certainly do NOT think you are a loser Toad. I know others feel that way about me but I do not base my opinion on myself on the way they see me because i am quite different from them. I've said before that you remind me of myself a few years ago Toad but you have a lot more going for you than I did & I really wish you would realize that. If anyone here is a loser; it's me but I know you & most others here don't feel that way about me. I'm worrying about relationships a lot less nowadays & as you can tell from my post; I am happier & less negative. I'm going to stop this pep-talk because I don't want to derail this thread too much but if you or anyone else here wants to talk; you are more than welcome to PM me

I'm not talking about them either. I'm talking about people who get no experience and have no choice.

There's nothing wrong with either of you, Toad - You need to be on some sort of medication to kick start you into a more positive train of thought, because as far as talking about it goes it doesn't seem to work. It's just a shame you don't live here. I'd give you a hand.

There's nothing wrong with either of you, Toad - You need to be on some sort of medication to kick start you into a more positive train of thought, because as far as talking about it goes it doesn't seem to work. It's just a shame you don't live here. I'd give you a hand.

Maybe some cognitive thought therapy would help. I've benefited from using MoodGym, the free online services.

Medication never helped me; I was happier quitting all my meds than I was the entire 5 years I was on em. I'm not familiar with cognitive thought therapy. This may seem kinda crazy but what pulled me out of my last bit of depression was having a fantasy crush to escape reality a bit. I would suggest crushing on the iCarly co-star Jennette McCurdy. Except for being completely obsessed & having some emotional pain at times; I have a better grip on reality & am more functional crushing on Miranda Cosgrove than I ever been in my life

I agree. I'm happier now (although I still have bad days) this past year that I was off my antidepressants than I ever was on them.

Cognitive thought therapy pretty much examines how you look at things and tries to unwarped any warped thoughts one may have about reality or themselves. It's usually trying to make the negative into positive. It's hard to explain but I like it.

We are aspies and not as instinctually geared toward mating, we can force it but it is not as strong a natural drive within us..

Many of my NT friends were sexual at a young age, they are programmed that way, we are not...........

Traditionally, girls married at 14 years old, had babies mid teens........

Last edited by Surfman on 28 Jun 2011, 2:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Their highschool are not what what our highschool was, teens nowadays are starting dating way younger.

No, I understand those teens' concerns, their social failures might a bad indication for their future.

If, let's say, all the class are dating and have bf/gfs while he/she is the only one single, then yes...he has the right to get worried and to start doubting things and try to fix them, especially if he/she doesn't want to remain like that.

I'd only tell those teens to not wait for too long before acting, do not wait for "things will become better at college" because this is totally not guaranteed and at the mid of the college you might find yourself telling "things will be better after college", and later "things will be better after finding a job"...nothing is guaranteed. Do not make my mistake.

So the sooner you act the better.

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 28 Jun 2011, 3:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Lol, i was that one that was always single (except for 2 months of my junior year). And that was because the guys were f*****g stupid and not worth my time. A bunch of "young bros" trying to be cool and talking about sex when it's obvious that they're all virgins. The only ones that were smart enough to be my friends, in the music and arts department, were already taken or gay. So not everyone who is single in high school is "a loser." Some of us just have higher standards than everyone else.

You have narrowed my post to just a call for losing-virginity, but it's certainly much deeper than that.

Really? So it isn't trying to force yourself into doing something you're not ready to just to fit in with everyone else? Is there some soul-cleansing to be had from chasing girls before you even know what to do with them? :/