Rules of Engagement

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Interesting, if that is the mold every single female fits I guess I am not a female....and yeah I think I'd go for the guy who isn't an ass to me, if they are an a**hole to that would be an obvious sign I should get away from them.

But thank you for negatively stereotyping everyone with a vagina.

So... the last days I've been feeling especially awake mentally, I feel like I could tackle this one and spew paragraphs out of most of the OP's statements Do you guys think I should try?

Go for it. And please contradict them all, so I can argue against that.

Sure *cracks knuckles*

If at least one person reads then it's worth it. It will take me a while though~

Yes, please do, I don't have the energy.

Sure, we're at the very, very least, anatomically different, and that must count for something. I have much deeper beliefs on that matter, but I'll start with something I believe can not be refuted.



Some men want women as a piece of meat or a posession. Every time I hear "she's ****able" or everytime I see someone decide to go after a woman solely for her looks, is a proof of that thought. If ther are enough of these guys, some women will assume all guys are like that, and guard themselves. They would be in their right, I guess, as long as they don't believe ALL guys are like that and become man-haters or something.



At a basic level, sure, even now it isn't deemed appropiate for a woman to approach a man.



Please improve your writing. I'll have to take my time interpreting what you meant there.

"Women take the risk of getting pregnant every time one of them has sex with a man, and if they do, they take the risk of getting stuck with him forever. Not to mention what kind of genes their children may receive from the guy. A woman's way to prove her love and devotion is bearing her partner's children"

I'll assume you meant that from now on. That used to be true, but with contraceptive methods that's no longer the case. I can see where this is going though... but I'll save it for later. There are very happy couples who decide not to have children, so your last statement is not universally true. nor should be an expectation in a modern society.



Huh, I've already seen that discussion somewhere else. I don't remember the details nor the specific arguments, but I remember someone saying women had been made to believe they went crazy at "those times of the month", and also always dismissed as crazy or mad during these times; and in the worst of the cases they actually believed that themselves. That was called gaslighting. Hormones do cause changes in behaviour, there are studies about it, but women are not their slaves.



What's your experience on that? How strong do you think you are anyway? Are you weak at times, or all the time? If you said "I'm strong" to yourself in the mirror, would you believe it?
I believe both parties in a relationship should be strong, although that's something we can't be all the time without getting exhausted, and personally, I like having enough intimacy with someone that I can show my soft spot without being judged, but it's not something I do every other day. Some people believe that when they are with a woman they can be weak around them all the time, and that's generally not true. This one is flaky, so feel pree to poke holes at it.



There are studies that show that women generally prefer their partners to have a higher income than them. There are also specific cases where they don't intrinsecally mind, but fear that the guy will feel emasculated if he earns less. Something I just thought of, woman who truly don't mind are uncommon, and if she left her less-earning partner for some reason, it would be harder for him to find someone else who doesn't mind either than just earning more and being attractive to more woman of the kind who care. Also, I don't believe women who care about that to be golddiggers. There are evolutionary reasons, and for those who don't like evolutionary theories, women in general haven't historically been able to enter the laboral market as equals to men until very recently. I do have a more exhaustive evolutionary explanation, but I'll bring it later if necessary.



Be sure not to confuse mr nice guy to Mr Nice Guy™ (whose expression was that?)



I don't like whiny woman. Nobody likes whiny people. Sure, there are times where it's completely reasonable to complain about something, but I've met a lot of women in my life I feel should "man up", and I like them less for that.



I once read that if you went to a woman telling her all about your woes it would wake a nurturing instinct on them and make them like you... as a mother of sorts. And for romantic attraction I don't think it works very well. If your way to make women like you is to tell them about your horrific past and make them pity you, then you probably are not a broken hero, just broken. Sorry if I make a lot of assumptions, but that's just the way I interpret it now. It makes semse with the part of "showing your weak side" earlier, before reading this I was suspecting you showed your weak side way too many times, and now that makes my belief stronger.



I see it as we value more what we have to fight for. If you're desperate for a woman, any woman, and eagerly go for everyone, then it shows. That a womanmlikes you is not rason enough that you should like them. I must admit sometimes I have to stop myself from being way too clingy, because I fear losing someone who already has some interest, because it's hard for me to talk with people in general, and then to know someone who may be worth it, and then I don't want to botch it but... see? it demonstrates insecurity.

I actually see vary little disagreement, BUT-

No real argument here, I used to feel as you do.

No, I did not go off as always seeming weak or needy or the like, in truth I hardly ever said much of anything of my own issues, but the times I did mention something they tended to ask more questions and as I answered them our own intimacy problems grew. not in just one relationship but others as well. ( I related my own stories, when they them selves felt they needed to talk about theirs) in hopes they would feel I could relate and empathies with them, when I should have just listened only)

Mostly it was when I tried to appease an unhappy female with pampering. they took it as my being clingy or needy. and as I said before, I choose my battles, some things are just not worth arguing about, I am not vary materialistic. but I have found that if I do not argue on some points then they also tend to feel me weak and weak minded. which works against me.



I do not mind whiny to much as long as they do not do it all the time (mostly they do that on their monthly), clingy makes me feel more secure and needed in some ways so I do not mind that either.

But where I was getting at, is it seems women does not want to listen to a man complain (whine) to much if at all, but instead be that strong individual that can and does Man- Up and take care of business. where they seem to feel since they are female that its fine and acceptable for them to do. that since they are females its OK for them to feel and be now and then fragile, where they expect men to be strong for them instead.

I do not think most mind when circumstances calls for it, but if its from an old or past wound then they expect you to have taken care of that business long ago. which in many ways is fine.



Read the above statement I already made concerning said subject.

BUT, if you know much about trauma issues and people, many times its hard to hide such issues if there still not resolved. its about like someone who has been beaten to the point of being traumatized by it, you suddenly raise a hand and they flinch without meaning to. this does not mean the person talks about it, but the partners do notice and ask questions. and with some, trauma issues can last a life time regardless of how much you try and work them out.

And I never come off as seeming desperate for a woman in my life, if anything I know I can go out and find my self in a relationship fairly easily, its just that of keeping it maintained that becomes the problem. I seem to lose their interest fairly fast. and much of what I was commenting about is what I am learning was the reasons why

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As for the evolutionary comment, when I mentioned the nest/egg syndrome, that was in many ways what I was referring too.

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It is possible that in your experience, the women you have known did not want to hear you complain and wanted you to be strong, but this is certainly not always the case. There are many women in the world who you have never met. The small sample of women you have encountered are not representative of women as a whole. I have no problem whatsoever with providing emotional support to my boyfriend when he is down. I do not feel turned off by him crying, I don't feel he has to be strong all the time in order for me to respect him. We both lean on each other in times of need.
I think it's important when you have opinions about an entire group of people to search further before you use your experiences to date in life as reflective of all society. Ask other people what their experiences have been, you might find that other people have different experiences with women. What happens when you consider your experiences to be reflective of an entire group is that you set yourself up for a lot of problems. People do not like when you make assumptions. And I can tell you, a lot of women like a man who isn't afraid to cry once in awhile, and doesn't always act like a stereotypical man. Honestly a lot of us are sick of stereotypical macho men. What you're doing is cutting yourself off from the possibility that you could find a woman who appreciates you as you are. By stereotyping us, you're saving yourself the trouble of actually finding the person for you. If you blame them for your problems, you don't have to look at yourself, and the role you play in your experiences. Life doesn't happen to you, it happens with you. You won't find many women who will be very sympathetic towards you if she hears all these stereotypes you have of her before even getting to know her.

I see your point, BUT-

When monthly like clock work with every female I have ever been with, they go off the emotional deep end, or become cranky as all hell, you have then to admit much of it is biological. but at those times you can not tell the female that unless you want them to bite your head off. and at those times if they want to argue its generally not a good idea to do so. save it for later.

As for emotional support,
EACH AND EVERY relationship I have ever been in, the women either started having wondering eyes, or cheated on me, and or dumped me for someone new before I was even out the door. after a while I started to see a pattern, and if I am seeing a pattern then it must be with me thats doing something wrong enough for them to be losing interest in the first place. so yes I blame my self, not them. and its in those things mentioned on other posts that I have found to be common denominators. because it was after many of those events that they started to lose interest.

Your right not all women are the same, but in general I have found those things to be the rule not the exceptions.

I have always accepted people at face value, not prejudge them. but its been only lately after I have been doing revaluations of my past relationships have I been starting to realize where I have been going wrong. otherwise there are no answers, only patterns.

I do not like the answers I been coming up with either, but they are the only things that make sense.

I got to admit I misjugded you. Most people who come around here with arguments similar to yours are self proclaimed Nice Guys™, and I've just seen too many of them around and lose my patiente. You seem to have things clearer but... I'll give you a proper reply tomorrow

LoL, one of the biggest complaints I get in my relationships is that I am TOO nice.
It took me a lot of thinking to understand what they meant and wanted.

It seems to me that these threads have BEEN depressing. This isn't the only one.

I don't behave different during my period either. I know that when you're trying to make sense of the world it can be easy to try and figure out the rules that govern everyone. It would be so much easier if it worked like that, but it doesn't. Trying to simplify socialization and relationships in this way won't work. You might think you've found the answers, but if you keep modifying your approach you will see that there are other options for you. You don't have to always repeat the same bad relationships. You can find better even if right now it doesn't feel like it. I think maybe the stereotyping is a way for you to feel more control of the situation, so that it isn't this unpredictable chance you're taking. Kind of like preparing yourself for disappointment so it doesn't hurt so much if it happens again.

hahaha loll
womenz, whops sorri, femalez be so crazy when they on they periods
ha ha not like us sensible MEN amirite fellas
ladiez can't be president because they're irrational 4 days a month lawwl chortle guffaw

who let the tacky 80's club comedian in here?

O I'm always emotional and crazy...my period just gives me the excuse to let my inner b***h out. Any why not, when men just seem to expect it?

What is so fu***g horrible about period emotionality? How many women are physically so broken they can't function these days. My ex takes pills for three days so she could at least stand up and walk in the garden. But NO, she doesn't change emotionally? Well, she is the brighten one, so she knows she changes and has no problem to admit it.
And yes, she is not you, but most of women in my life have this symptoms, so yes - I generalize. Because it can help many men who wonder why the feminist BS and political correctness doesn't work