How did first you meet your GF/BF?

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that's just the problem. folks who date on the internet just want the easy way out. technology is not always gonna solve everyone's issues and they aren't willing to put effort into stepping out of their comfort zone to meet people in person.

logically, you can't just approach a person and ask him/her straight up "can i date you?" just like that. it's a no-brainer; you will obviously get funny looks for that. make an effort to get to know a living, breathing person inside and out. if there's chemistry between the two people, maybe you can ask them out on a date.

a computer won't give you kindness and love, or validation that you deserve. it's a tool that can be used by individuals who take advantage of others in a negative and in a dangerous way. people will eventually make up lies to lure their victims to them.
believe me, it almost happened to me and i don't wanna go through that again.
no one can achieve being loved in front of a screen.

please be careful with dating online! you'll never know what the outcome might be. ESPECIALLY FOR US ON THE SPECTRUM!

I met my girlfriend on aspie affection shortly before I went on an exchange to Germany. I saw that there was a girl from Germany and I chatted with her to try to practice my German. We liked each other and met a couple months later. It seemed like the most wild coincidence because usually aspie affection is really slow and I hardly get any responses, and also it was a wild coincidence that I happened to see her profile and happened to be in Germany at the same time.

I don't understand this chemistry stuff that people keep talking about. I'm not sure I ever had it. I was kind of under the impression that both of us (the girlfriend I just told you about and myself) had very bad relationship experiences in the past and that we could have been happy with any person who could credibly promise not to hurt us. Apart from that it seemed like the only thing we really shared was a passion for learning and getting out and doing things. I can't think of very much else that we had in common. But I don't want to make it sound like we had a bad relationship. We cared for each other very much and were very happy together. She once told me that she thought that I valued her for her ability to entertain me, as if it were a bad thing, and I guess it is true. That and the physical intimacy and the comfort of having somebody who cared that I existed. But I've never had a friendship or relationship that wasn't that way. I am wondering what other kinds of relationships there can be? Also when we chatted online I read everything she sent me very carefully and was able to decide that I liked her before I met her. It was really almost a conscious decision. Meeting her did not change my attitude, it just added a few more particulars that I needed to get myself used to. I don't think I could unconsciously become attached to someone. So this stuff about, "Chemistry" seems very strange to me.

Single atm, but met my very first girlfriend at high school, when I was about 15 or 16. Ive had a few more relationships before that, but it was nothing serious enough to be worth mentioning here.

When you meet someone, are you attracted to someone, feel nothing, or feel repulsed? That unexplainable attraction without even knowing much about personality is referred to as "chemistry".

Thanks for the warning, but I very vigilantly watch out for psyco behavior. So far, I mostly see autistic traits. He isn't totally NT. We have been together for 4 months.

I'd appriciate not being steriotyped. "Girl tries online dating and winds up dating criminal" doesn't happen every time. Besides, how do you know I'm not the psyco?

Wrong Planet/Facebook

WrongPlanet/OkCupid.

she approached me on irc. we talked a few lines and left her number to which I replied that I will only be able text her the following week. since I'm such a geek i left the number in the log file. The next week arrived and I got my mobile and remember that there was a person that left me a number, I had to go and search for it. at first I was hesitant but sent a small text. Nothing happened. And she texted me back more or less the following day... we sent each other texts for months, before she decided to phone me, it was unexpected. Then she set up the date and time and place to meet. The rest is history.

No wonder so many people are completely fine with being shallow now that they've got a better word for it.

True - especially since so many people aren't willing to consider "the long haul" - they want hot & passionate right now! (Just look at the OKcupid question 'which is more important, passion or commitment?'... most responders chose "passion".) *barf*

It's all well and good - that rush of excitement and heart palpitations you get from being with someone who just excites you so much you just wanna' grab 'em! But if that's ALL there is, there's nothing left of your worthless relationship once that firey infatuation cools down some.

Better have a good personality match to secure a real relationship before that happens or off they go to find a new exciting partner. (Stupid chat-line commercials like to say, "Feel that RUSH of excitement - talk to someone new tonight!!") *barf*

I'm confused by the thread title. Is it how did you meet your first BF/GF? Or how did you first meet your GF/BF? I've had three BF's.

First: TAFE. We'd been in the same classes for over a year before he started to pursue me.
Second: WP. He was a newbie and I responded to his intro thread. We started PM'ing and things took off from there.
Third: WP. You know those life situations where you just look back on it and laugh? That wasn't one of them.

I met my first boyfriend on myspace. He sent me a message telling me he saw I like video games and we should get together and play them together. We chatted for a week on there and then we met in town and the next day I was his girlfriend. It only lasted three months.

I met my second boyfriend on a kinky dating site. He sent me two messages while I was away and he thought I ignored him and thought he scared me off. I think we talked a little bit before I was away and then I was gone that weekend and I came home and there were two messages sent by him. That relationship also didn't last long.

I met my husband on an adult forum. I posted a thread asking people there if they all wanted to meet up with me and have some fun with our kink or just hang out. Then my husband messaged me telling me he read my stories and he liked them. We chatted on IM for three weeks before we met up on my birthday. He almost scared me away because he came off as desperate. First we have known each other for three weeks, we meet up the first time and he is already thinking about marriage and having kids with me. That was creepy. So I nearly ran and he begged me for me to give him a chance. We are still together and married.

Dont worry, most people take their time getting to know someone through emails before setting up a date is even considered.
And yes we have had several threads about how quite a few people show warning signs on this get to know you emails and you have to be careful about that

I just got into a relationship recently. I met my bf online on a dating site. I was casually messaging guys not expecting much. He asked to meet up for dinner, I agreed. But somehow that didnt happen at first, we stopped messaging each other. So I finally messaged him a week later asking if he wanted to meet up or what? He replied saying he wanted to. Then we tried to plan to go bowling, we arranged a date however I lost my phone and put off the date for safety sake. Finally I asked if he wanted to meet at a coffee shop and that worked. We talked plenty, and I started to feel something on the 2nd date. And then it took off from there. This is my 1st in person relationship so its good. Before I've had a couple strictly online bfs who were 1000s miles away.

I met my first BF at school since were are schoolmate.

Summer 2011 - I had just flown back from my home of 4 years in FL - I had a difficult, drawn-out breakup with my girlfriend of nearly 10 years. I was over her, but really upset because she'd cheated, stolen a bunch of stuff, spent all of my savings. She'd disappeared with my car to her new boyfriend's house. I'd left the area, told her to pack and move out.

So, my brother threw a 12-pack of beer at me, and dragged me to a party on July 2nd. I wasn't meaning to, but I talked to a pretty girl there for hours and hours. She seemed to have a set of her own problems which were very much familiar. We also knew a lot of the same people, but had never personally met.

She became a good friend and we supported each other. We hung out repeatedly, she was very insistent because we were having so much fun. I began to feel better and better.

I realized we had a ton of stuff in common.

I first kissed her a few months later.

We've been together ever since. My life has been so much better because of her.

There's something about meeting a great person when you are at your most vulnerable. There's no social pretenses, you're just totally yourself.