Ever met anyone on a dating site?

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Women do have a thing where they like to try and fix men. It's a little like men wanting to take care of women. But I don't think they want to date rapists and child abusers to be honest.

Tell that to my Mum.

Ouch. Yep. I've met guys from dating sites. It's alright. I even had a Pina Colada song moment. Hilarious.

I can tell you why women liked the heartbroken, penniless thing - because it's hysterical and really stands out from the yatta, yatta, blah, blah, blah on so many profiles.

Anyway - I totally agree with your assessment that you should be feeling upbeat and positive when you write that description. People want to know what kind of stuff you do because they want to know what kind of dates you'd go on and potentially what life with you would be like. If you can't summon the enthusiasm to do with some joie de vivre then it doesn't sound like someone who would be much fun to go out with.

"I like to play video games" translates as "I will play video games endlessly while you wait around and I ignore you."

Sorta like how "adventurous" doesn't mean "do stuff like climb Mount Everest or take a trip to Antarctica".

Which brings me back to my original point: My life doesn't sound very interesting to an outsider and I don't go out and drink all the time which is what it seems to all be about. These days I don't do much at all. I would take her out for dinner, short breaks, holidays, go somewhere at the weekend, or lunch etc, but that is all potential. They seem to want me to have ran the installer and have it all booted all up ready! I could tell a white lie and say that I like to do those things, that would work quite well. With Aspies trying to date NTs it all seems to be about pretense and pretending you are someone else, finding a way around that is tough.

I have met 4 women that I met on a dating site first. Two became good friends, one is maybe becoming a good friend too, but none have become lovers.

Indeed, often you write lengthy messages but receive no response. Keep in mind most dating sites have an inbalance of female and male members, so many women receive an overload of messages and will only pick the most interesting ones to reply to.

How do you become good friends? Did you or they say "let's just be friends"?

I have a rule - If your message is interesting, says enough, asks enough about them and is short enough to post on Twitter chances are people will respond to it. Anything I've written longer than a paragraph has never been replied to, even from people that by the looks of their profile would be smarter than me.

The one wasn't searching a boyfriend, just new friends. And that's what we became. Good friends, that is

The other one was a date who didn't really like my type for romance but found me nice to talk to and thus asked if I wanted her as a friend. Which I accepted as I also liked talking to her.

The nr 3 ... she says she has too little time to really make dating possible, but that she wants to be friends. In all honesty I'm hoping she somehow will change her mind and want love after all, even when her schedule is quite tight. I hope there will be a way somehow to make her change her mind and wanting to see if we can be more than friends.

Nr 4 : broke all contacts

So far my dating effords and their results.

Oh yes, 2 other girls that I knew would never be more than friends before meeting them in real. But as I appreciate friendship too, I thought it was not waste of time to meet anyway, even though I knew in advance we won't be lovers.

^ I see. Thank you for your response.

Those two who you became friends with, how often do you see them?

Only once or twice a month ; hence why they are friends without any realistic chance of turning into a partner after all. I know where the boundaries lay between us.

The idea of a Tweet sided text attracting better responses sounds interesting, but the issue is a lot of profiles state "write me if you got some interesting story to tell and you can say more than 'hi, how are you?'" - they want to know generally why you chose to contact them. Which makes sense ; but I guess most women just get too many messages and have to be selective which ones to respond to. The balance of genders is actually an imbalance on virtually every dating site, so women are in the position they cannot afford to respond to all messages they got. In a way your first message should leave enough curiosity on her side, and those are the messages she will actually likely reply to.

My experience with dating sites (it wasn't even my idea, I got it as a "present" last year) is weird. As I have realized about now, I was quite popular with the women I met (and I only met those that wrote me), and I was honestly surprised that these were quite attractive, well-manered and educated girls and women, which made me wonder alot why they resorted to online dating. For one of them, I think I knew what her "problem" was (she was very tall, a little over 6'1'', and so she was looking for guys that were taller than her), but with the other, I really didn't know why. I did have a blast of a time, I have to say, because the matching system of that site was very accurate, and the "forced" nature of online dating eliminated the "breaking the ice" phase. It usually went on quite intense as far as communication goes, and going to the movies or cooking together, all was quite well. But then AS hit me again, as their interest vanished almost from one day to the next. I couldn't figure it out why I wasn't interesting anymore all of a sudden, but after checking with the forums on that platform, people told me how women usually expect things to go in online dating: If they pick you and they like you on the first meeting and you agree for a second, it is almost a sealed deal for them that you and her are now becoming a couple, and they expect you to take the initiative from that point on. And because I wasn't doing that, they discarded me - and I have sympathy for that - after all, I know I give away very mixed signals, and to prevent yourself from getting hurt, you cut the ties as long as you are not as invested - and moved along. I have learned very much from this experience, about the subtleties of female signs of attraction, about their expectations and how to behave. My problem is, in general, that I am a very polite, considerate and attentive person that knows that is can be very hard to put up with, and so I try to balance that out by being very chivalrous in general. And because I never ask for anything in return, people realize I am honest with it, and I can see that this can how that can be confusing. After all, we did meet for dating, so I guess women tend to get very impatient if they think they "did enough" to show their attraction, and get frustrated very quickly if they think the feeling isn't mutual.

Again, really amazing replies here, far better than I was expecting.

Thanks a lot.

One time, and thankfully the last. I personally think it was more that we met on here than on the dating site. Aside from him, I have not met anyone else. A couple of the guys creeped me out by finding my location and trying to pick me up without notifying me first. I didn't realize location services was active on my account.

Nice art! I wish I could find the subject matter so that I could actually do some art sometimes (I want to draw but never know what).

Thank you, random OP.
Same here. I actually haven't drawn anything like this stuff for awhile; haven't had the time or energy to want to spend 9 hours digitally coloring like I have in the past, lol. :p What stuff do you like to draw normally?