If you've ever felt bad about online dating...

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That actually sounds just like that "Nice Guy TM" thing that people on this forum made-up(I think). just sayin

That is the image I got it from.

I didn't see anything wrong with it.

Now hale_bopp and other ladies here would create a series of threads for the new term "The Good-doer Fire Fighter TM" and start theorizing why "Good-doer fire fighters" aren't really good-doers therefore not desired by women, and Geeko would come with his pants down and shows off his ability to extinguish fire with his piss.

I thought one of the atributes of the Nice Guy TM was fakeness.

I do risk my life, there is real danger, and I've never felt entitled to anything because of my position. There is a cafe that gives 50% off to firefighters, they sometimes forget (new people, etc). If they forget, I just smile and pay the full price.

I think the opinions on the photos so far are subjective. I can't really say what I think as a guy since I wouldn't know what to think.

But your relationship needs, I will just bring in the bold if I can.

Self-efficacy
Bottom line: you need a partner who has a good degree of energy, enthusiasm and self-efficacy like you, as opposed to a partner who needs constant nurturance and reassurance to feel empowered and valued as person

This would mean that the second you meet a girl who is insecure with herself, don't try to date them. Be friends with them if you would like to. Your Relationship Readiness and Communication sections indicate the same thing.

Conflict Resolution:
Bottom line: you need a partner who is patient, a “big picture thinker” and can relinquish control and pride to make the best decisions for the good and growth of the relationship.


Impatient or impulsive people likely aren't the type for you to date based on what I am reading there.

Sexuality:
Bottom line: you need someone who sees sex as romantic and fun and especially who will like to be submissive to your sexual desires.

Apparently, casual sex or relationship is fine for you. This may not go over well with a partner who only wants sex within the confines of a relationship and don't be surprised if that type makes you wait. According to your attitude towards love, you prefer a partner that makes you wait until you are both ready before the romance escalates (seems contradictory)

Your preferred expressions of affection indicate that your love language is primarily words of affirmation. The rest of your answers indicate that physical touch may very well be a close second. The words of affirmation will indicate that you like it more when a partner tells you "I like it when you kiss my cheek" or "you did a fantastic job with dinner tonight." These kind of comments tend to make you feel more loved. A woman who desires quality time may not be the best fit for you based on your answers as well, and some will feel that your need for words of affirmation make you weak and insecure.

I wouldn't complain about getting no results on online dating.. its just as bad for good catch guys as it is for bad ones, unless you look like some sort of wolverine clone.

^ It was my body hair that got all the attention back then, I knew it.

It still sounds weird. Saying "I risk my life for total strangers" would put me off instantly.. I would expect most people to do that if they saw a person in a burning house and not have to parade it.

I see what your saying.

Just a hypothetical; how would you react if you saw the whole quote "I risk my life for total strangers, imagine what I'd do for you"

Unfortunately, it doesn't all fit in the title line.

But it's done, removed.

As an aside; you'd be amazed how many people would rather pull out a camera and film then help.

makes you sound worse TBH.

Is it the artificial interaction of online dating sites that makes it difficult? For instance, a lot of stuff I read on a profile, I would not know until well into forming a bond with a person in real life. Therefore, I can be super-critical and picky of people on online dating sites, more quick to reject a person.

Also, there is something to be said for hearing a person's voice or seeing them in vivo when it comes to making a connection. Email or text message seems to sterile.

I don't know. This is just a theory I have.

Drop the helping stranger part, everyone know what a fireghter does.

Just title it with 3 words like: Adventurous, stable and ambitious.
Something like that.

or just put: "$50k + Home + Car + Tall".

If only dating was boiled down to materialistic posessions and hobbies, I'd have 3 girls on each arm.

Alas, it isn't at all - especially online dating - it's all superficial, attractiveness and personality, and much more.

Honestly though if you're expecting girls to admire you over your house and income it just won't happen, those things are more pre-requisites, unless you're a weirdo who eats his cereal without milk, or pizza without sauce.. horrid analogy but it's the same thing, basically.

What are you saying when you message people? Who are you sending messages to?

I find that in addition to having a good profile, the above two questions are important to consider. A lot of women on those sites don't take it seriously. As others have said, I think that a lot of them just use it for the ego boost, or use it in the vain hope that Brad Pitt will message them and sweep them off to a magical castle in the sky, with rainbows and marshmallows! Usually if you really read their profiles you can get a feel for what kind of person they are, and whether they're actually looking for someone to date.

What to say in messages is the easy part! You seem to have good grammar and write decently, so I doubt you have a problem there. That said, I'd try to keep things a little less...personal? Like the lines "imagine what I'd do for you", and "Looking for a girlfriend who is my best friend". I don't really know how to describe it properly, but I'd recommend leaving those out.

In my personal case, I have really good success with the online dating part of online dating. I have like a 75% response rate when I message people, because I only message people that I have something in common with and that appear likely to respond. But once we meet up, they always seem to fizzle out after 2-3 dates. I still haven't convinced myself as to whether that's due to my social difficulties or if it's just the nature of the game...either way it's quite frustrating.

Maybe it's cause you look like a "Scruffy-looking Nerf Herder".(or so you say)