Rejection That Makes No Sense

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The impression I get from the OP is that he didn't actually have any kind of relationship with this woman.

Yes, that happened several times, but they weren't ignored. I noticed the hints, but didn't know how to follow through. I have a hard time when it comes to "closing the deal."

Last edited by WilliamTheConqueror on 10 Aug 2014, 3:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.

That is correct, I didn't. But she still knew who I was. I would come into the office where we lived and she was there many times. She would start acting differently because I was there (she would get nervous and her friends would signal to her that I was there). Every now and then I would say a few things to her and I could see she had a hard time talking back. Sometimes I would go to the gym and she would be there, and she would watch me workout. We definitely had some kind of distant relationship. Many times that's the only kind that could happen with two people who are both shy.

Well, her rejection of your friend request on Facebook does make sense. She doesn't know you, other than as an acquaintance and if she is the woman you mentioned on an earlier thread she knows you only because she worked in an office that you went into once or twice a week.

There is no reason why she should accept your friend request.

It still doesn't make much sense because of how much she liked me. I'll have you know that when females like me they don't just like me, they really really like me. They act like they've never seen anything like me before (and I say that in the best possible sense of the phrase. Check out my other thread "What is this I don't even..." to see what I mean). How do you perceive someone like that and then reject them? Forced loss of interest, maybe?

Last edited by WilliamTheConqueror on 10 Aug 2014, 6:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.

It seems that she doesn't like you as much as you think she does.

Well, probably not anymore. And even that's questionable.

Those things happen to me all the time, as well. I've had quite a few guys fall for me almost instantly, speak of how much they "care" for me and how "I'm like no one they've ever met before", and then if I'm ever interested in them in return everything just goes "poof" into thin air, so to speak.
Personally, I don't doubt your perceptions that at one time she did like you quite a bit. But, as you just stated "probably not anymore".

Apologies, I think I'm just so invested in this topic stream because it resonates on such a personal level with me. :/

maybe you misunderstood her? What exactly did she do to make you think she likes you, and maybe she was only being polite?

Flatout rejection of friend request...is it obvious who you are on Facebook? If she knows it's you then don't bother with her again. It's obvious that either she was never interested to begin with, or she found a boyfriend and thus has no further use for you in any capacity.

WTC, I read that, and it sounded really, really odd. Like I'd bet anything you're misinterpreting what's going on.

There's a thing -- oh, you can call it social flirting. The people involved are not really going to get together. They're just flirting, it's for play, just socializing. And it's possible that these women are play-flirting with you because it's just what they do, and you're not playing the game back. It's not an invitation to screw them. But when you don't pick up and play, you seem standoffish, even judgmental. That could be what's going on.

Normally if a woman really, really wants you, she'll make it quite plain by speaking up, inviting you out, inviting you to her house/apt, making suggestions that you go off somewhere alone (in a serious, not jokey-flirty, way).

The woman in the office may have thought you were cute and her friends may have had a laugh about that ("Here's your boyfriend!") but that doesn't necessarily mean she really wants anything with you. It just means she thinks you're cute. And trying to friend someone on fb when you're not really friends is also a little strange. If you actually saw her and asked her out, that might be something (might), but yeah, I can see why she didn't accept.

^^

I think this advice is pretty helpful OP.

I can't speak for why anyone might be upset when they don't receive any flirts back, but there is the emotional part that people want to feel desired as well. People not flirting back can be a bit of a downer.

They really couldn't do that because it was at their worksite. They would risk getting fired if they did that. Also, they might be too nervous to ask me (and nervousness was pretty much visible in all of them).

ALSO, let's assume that I'm not misinterpreting anything. What then?
(Which is exactly what I believe to be the case, by the way.)

Probably best to assume some other guy went in for the kill.

It really doesn't matter whether or not the rejection makes sense - no one owes anyone an explanation for rejecting them, so you just have to suck it up and move on.

True, a girl rejected you, there's millions so go out there, OP.

Being an aspie or someone with other developmental disorders your bound to be rejected, that is life.