Do girls only care about "bad boys"?

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Hale Bopp makes a valid point. I HATE nasty behaving, mean, insensitive, cheating, abusing, playing kind of guys. Don't understand why women fall for them. However, I do like guys that are somewhat confident and have social skills. I would love a sweet, caring, socially skilled, somewhat confident man.

There are plenty of normal/nice-looking guys who will also treat them badly when they're in a relationship, some might even act more 'well-behaved' to lure them into the relationship. So I would not really base my opinion soley on outside appearance, I do not find nasty behavior attractive but not all with a more deviant appearance exhibit that, most don't really seem to though you'd have to define how you define normal and what you see as 'delinquent looking'. I find long hair to be attractive of course its more normal for guys to have short hair, can't really judge someone on the length of their hair for instance.

I had an experiment five years ago - I started dating as many girls as I could even if particular one is not interesting to me. With half of them I acted as always and these relations were soon broken up by girls. But with another half I acted like complete moron, I treated them badly, often ignored, abused - and they wanted to be with me more and more. Education, wealth - these factors meant nothing.
So while two dozens is not a selectionfor true scientifical experiment I still rely on this data and I'm sure that most of girla are really a bit masochistic.
I have also another example of my cousin - he is junkie, never had work, never had money or car, lives with parents, dozen of times was arrested for minor crimes and his only hobby is watching tv in basement but he always has lots of girls.

I think its because women want to be with someone on their level (or above).
See, women have this whole hierarchy of men that we are not aware of. Its all relative though and this is where they run into problems.
If a guy shows a woman that he doesnt care she will love it because it shows her she has found someone on her level (or above) in this hierarchy of theirs.

Now if a man dotes on a woman, it doesn't matter how rich or handome he is, she will dump him in disgust. Just look at Andrew Stern and Katie Cleary.

They are probably low value, emotionally or mentally disordered women. No offense.

It's possible of course but it's strange that you take two dozens random girls during the year and they all are disordered in same way - rich and poor, handsome and average looking. But maybe I'm right at some points - if here are lots of topics like "girls don't like good guys". However for me this result is anyway gave nothing - I wish I know how to find girlfriend and remain myself. So as all these "nice guys" around

Sounds reasonable. But damn, that's a bit incredible for me. Be rough with girl you want be together? Abuse her? Damn it's like hitting and kicking your business partner Or maybe I'm just too soft... I was growing almost without father so that may be result.

Maybe there are any ways to show "required" hierarchy level without this? How do you think?

Yep......another one of these typical threads......

I think that the only way that any legit girl would fall for a "bad boy" was if he pulled a nice act just to lure her into the relationship. Guys like that can be really good at toying with girls and tricking them into believing that they are good guys. Then she doesn't find out who he really is until it is too late.

Some of the girls that go for bad boys may be the "easy" type that will take any guy who will get with them.

I definitely do not go for the so called "bad boy" type, but I do like guys who are confident. Someone who is outgoing, but not in an annoying, unintelligent way. In general, I can't get along with anyone who is self-deprecating and that has a negative attitude, guy or girl, friendship or relationship.

I'm not sure that's right - I've seen many examples where guy was't acting like good one even in the start of relations. Instead it was seen from the side as he doesn't care too much about her and mostly about himself. Like he doesn't care if she'll stay with him or not. A bit like a suggestion above that some (or most?) girls in some cases see lack of attention as sign of attraction.

But not always - I also often pay no attention to girls around and they do the same Once I read in some pickup article that making first positive contact with girl and then pretending to ignore is a good tactics in dating. I don't like such mindset t dating as to hunting freal beast but maybe that is true in some cases.



That's possible sometimes. However I've never ever met such girls - don't think there are plenty of them.

All I can say is, confidence is valued waaaaaay too highly in our society to the point where women will literally date a dude who is confident and not much else (unless you look like deer turds, then they will call you narcissistic instead). Social skills are valued too much too, and today's version of "social skills" means talking about the most inane things, like the new episode of Big Bang Theory or how much lint is in your bellybutton. I wouldn't put too much value in either of those things myself.

I miss those days where dudes were judged on character and all of them had a shot. Now it's just about 50% of men who have a shot with women, if that. While most women on the planet or damn near can find at least 10 guys to date. Hell, my roommate is like that. He's got a sh***y job, and no plans for the future, but the dude has three girlfriends (don't ask, it's a long story, maybe I'll tell it in the adult forum later) and about 50 other girls who have feelings for him as well. But this guy has almost nothing going for him. He's my friend, but......

Women want guys who are nice AND strong (not necessarily in the physical sense).
Some women will settle for one out of two of these characteristics, which is why they accept jerks.
Some women, like some men, are not very bright and do things that are not in their best interest. You wouldn't want to be with these women even if they liked you, because they have poor judgement and will later do things like run up your credit cards and cheat on you with the postman. So be thankful to the "bad boys" for keeping them away from you.

Its not being rough or abuse, it's just showing a lack of caring about what she thinks.
There are many ways to show this from non-caring body language to words.

Tattoos are another thing. In the olden days only men who had reached a certain rank could get a tattoo. It was used as a marker of hierarcy. Now any old Joe can get a tattoo but women still find them sexy. Notice the most popular type of tattoo is a 'tribal' one?

This usage of tattoos as status symbols seems innate, it pops up in all kinds of places. The most recent example I can think of is sailors.

Sailors have used tattoos to show their achievements up to the modern day.

Last edited by slenkar on 02 Dec 2014, 11:29 am, edited 1 time in total.

Who others are attracted to is their business, not yours.

These so called "bad boys" most likely have a lot of great qualities that you have no idea about because you don't get to know them as intimately as their girlfriends do.

Instead of criticizing others, work on your own life. Socialize with the women who you are compatible with, and don't even bother thinking about the others. It's counter-productive.

This is TERRIBLE advice. You are advising him to become emotionally abusive.

It's not abusive its more taking a leadership role. The General of the Army doesn't ask the troops opinions on most matters.
This is what works, I didnt make up the rules.I just notice them.

Women dont want to be an equal partner they want to be lead.

I WISH that women responded to someone who was nice and took their opinions seriously.
I used to be a real nice guy, that also made me real lonely guy

Some of what I may say, may be dark and potentially NSFW, so don't read if you don't want to be depressed, but I thnk women value 'dangeorus males' because dangerous males make excellent warriors, and it was these sort of males that have always had the most success in passing on their genes.

I read a theory the other day (here is where the potentially NSFW part comes in, don't read ahead if you don't want want to feel bummed out at this sort of darkness) that human males have evolved large penises compared to other primates because each thrust pushes semen out, so essentially the head acts as a shovel, what does this sort of scenario paint? Gang-rape. what do you think has happened historically (and even long before history) when one tribe conquers another tribe? The males are killed and the women are gang-raped by the warriors, many of the great empires of the world have operated like this, especially the Romans and Mongols.

This crap was just another common part of warfare up until recent centuries, and it might be an enormous factor in developing a woman's preference for warrior-males. I mean by putting up with a warrior-males antics, she helps to preserve society and prevent her rape, she merely has to endure when it back-fires every once in awhile, but even when this system collapses, it's another warrior-male that is going to pass on his genes through her. So it's the warrior-male that will always win out the overwhelming majority of the times, and I think this in turn makes humans much more war-like, his daughter will be reinforced in her preference for dangerous males, while the male is reinforced in his preference for battle.