Board index › Coping in life › Love and Dating

What I'm doing wrong?

Page 2 of 5 [ 69 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

hurtloam
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,748
Location: Eyjafjallajökull

09 Jun 2016, 4:43 pm

HighLlama wrote:
[quote="hurtloam"

I wouldn't because I would think I was bothering her. But, you don't have to use a lot of compliment to show you're into something. If I ask them to spend time together and they accept, then they are interested enough. If they stop accepting, I'll get the point.


I don't have the guts to keep asking. I just feel like I'm making a fool of myself.

Also I did something stupid. He asked me if I enjoyed the thing he invited me to and I said no. I liked being with him, I meant that the activity itself wasn't something I'd do again. I should have made more effort to show him I had appreciated the invite. He'll probably never invite me to anything again



HighLlama
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Apr 2015
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,017

09 Jun 2016, 4:46 pm

Sorry you feel that way! I hate when I've answered the question asked and only later realize what they were actually asking me. It can be so frustrating, but don't beat yourself up over it. Or explaining yourself might be a good way to let him know some of what you deal with if those kinds of communication issues happen a lot. Laugh it off and he may not think it's a big deal after all.



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

09 Jun 2016, 4:47 pm

Ah man, Hurtloam!

He might think you didn't enjoy HIS company.



r00tb33r
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 28 May 2016
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,953

09 Jun 2016, 4:47 pm

hurtloam wrote:
He'll probably never invite me to anything again

Your turn to invite?



hurtloam
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,748
Location: Eyjafjallajökull

09 Jun 2016, 4:55 pm

r00tb33r wrote:
hurtloam wrote:
He'll probably never invite me to anything again

Your turn to invite?


I did, he said yes. By that logic it's his turn now.



The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,664
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

09 Jun 2016, 5:00 pm

No it's your turn because you said to him that you didn't like his last invitation. You nullified it, it doesn't count anymore.

You want us to tell you what you are doing wrong after all, right?



Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 09 Jun 2016, 5:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

09 Jun 2016, 5:00 pm

Write him a little note saying you enjoyed his company. Nothing wrong with that.



hurtloam
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,748
Location: Eyjafjallajökull

09 Jun 2016, 5:03 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Write him a little note saying you enjoyed his company. Nothing wrong with that.


No, it's been a few weeks now. That would be weird.



HighLlama
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Apr 2015
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,017

09 Jun 2016, 5:06 pm

hurtloam wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
Write him a little note saying you enjoyed his company. Nothing wrong with that.


No, it's been a few weeks now. That would be weird.


Maybe. I'd tend to agree with you, but the other night my therapist told me he thought I should contact this woman I went on a few dates with about 6 months ago. I thought that would be pretty weird, though we really got along well and would talk on the phone for hours. He said I had a 50/50 chance of success, so why not? I know that's not quite your situation since you already have plans with this guy, but maybe sometimes the option that seems odd can be right.



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

09 Jun 2016, 5:08 pm

I thought it was more recent.

Invite him to play snooker.



hurtloam
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,748
Location: Eyjafjallajökull

09 Jun 2016, 5:11 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
No it's your turn because you said to him that you didn't like his last invitation. You nullified it, it doesn't count anymore.

You want us to tell you what you are doing wrong after all, right?


Ugh!

I keep coming on here expecting you all to say, oh well you live and learn it's time to move on.

OK. I will invite him to one more thing. And that's it.



The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,664
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

09 Jun 2016, 5:13 pm

hurtloam wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
No it's your turn because you said to him that you didn't like his last invitation. You nullified it, it doesn't count anymore.

You want us to tell you what you are doing wrong after all, right?


Ugh!

I keep coming on here expecting you all to say, oh well you live and learn it's time to move on.

OK. I will invite him to one more thing. And that's it.



Well yeah, you screw it up by telling him that you didn't enjoy the last invite.

Your only chance now to repair this screwing-up is by you inviting him.



hurtloam
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,748
Location: Eyjafjallajökull

09 Jun 2016, 5:16 pm

OK, while we're at it, I have another confession. I was so upset when I started to think he didn't like me back and I felt so ashamed of myself for liking someone so obviously out of my league and I didn't want anyone to think I was so pathetic, I've started a rumour that I like somebody else.

The someone else is not someone he knows and who doesnt fancy me, so I figured it was a safe cover.

Which is in itself quite pathetic.



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

09 Jun 2016, 5:22 pm

Get this through your thick skull LOL

NOBODY'S OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE!

What makes this guy superior to you?



The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,664
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

09 Jun 2016, 5:23 pm

hurtloam wrote:
OK, while we're at it, I have another confession. I was so upset when I started to think he didn't like me back and I felt so ashamed of myself for liking someone so obviously out of my league and I didn't want anyone to think I was so pathetic, I've started a rumour that I like somebody else.

The someone else is not someone he knows and who doesnt fancy me, so I figured it was a safe cover.

Which is in itself quite pathetic.


That's screwing-up number II.

Good job!

Honestly, If I was the guy I would have lost interest.



hurtloam
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Mar 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,748
Location: Eyjafjallajökull

09 Jun 2016, 5:27 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Get this through your thick skull LOL

NOBODY'S OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE!

What makes this guy superior to you?


Better looking, better social skills.