Why don't I have any affection for anyone?

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That's a highly misunderstood issue, gb. I'm no more "pretending" to be someone else than I am to take care of any other part of my health. For example, if I didn't take the estrogen, I would likely have osteoperosis by now (and other issues to delicate to mention, but I wouldn't be able to work because of them). If I didn't take the progesterone, then I would leave the door open for cancer. The testosterone is a natural part of a woman's hormonal make up that also reduces other issues of menopause, including loss of muscle tone (including the urethra, some women become incontinent) insomnia and fatigue. Nature only makes sure that women are viable through the reproductive years. Middle aged women are forgotten and discounted because all of these symptoms make it very difficult for them just to face another day.

You are probably starting to lose your testosterone by age 39, as well. Everyone is different. Some people keep their hormones longer, but, in general, the hormone supply was not made to last as long as we do these days. I know that mine certainly have not, and there is no need to suffer.

I think you could also put it the opposite way: It's not really the person, their personality, my true self, who may have a lower sex drive approaching mid-life, it's just the loss of a hormone, which may be replaceable. It is not a drug.

Men and younger women who don't know yet what the experience is like are the first to have your response, but often such men might be the first to leave a woman who was in that situation. A kind of "let them eat cake" attitude. Let them suffer and lose their marriage, their life.

I encourage you to look more deeply into the issue and to exercise compassion for the women and their partners when you do so.

Sorry, Physicsteen, if I took the thread in another direction. However, maybe you can see that we face this issue throughout life. Your questions about yourself are good questions and important.