What is the main reason why guys have to do the approaching?

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Again, no, I didn't. None of the examples on this page were mine.

What a cynical view. Have you ever considered that there are people who can find the good in most people of the opposite sex and would thus date a vast majority of them? 'Cause I'm one of those people. Painting guys who aren't extremely picky as people who only care about sex is a terrible attitude, and untrue for quite a few people (men and women alike). The irony is, guys get kicked around for being picky as well. So which is it? Should we be picky, or not? There is really no middle ground in this case; picky is picky.

Also, BlueMax continues to hit the nail on the head every single time he posts. Too bad people have to pick on his weaknesses in order to have any sort of retort.

Women are selective, well that for sure. So I assume most women are going to hate shy guys 5 year down the line.
btw Im not a shy guy.

Women are selective because we're trying to find someone that we're not going to hate five years down the line:
Then why do alot of women date jerks then? is That the reason why women won't date shy men because they think shy men
are going be become bad in 5 years. I have no idea what you are saying?

Well in my case I am just afraid of approaching people in general. So usually if I want to be approached I try to go to places I'd be approachable and just chill and see if anyone approaches me.

I'm close to 50 and grew up being told that if you call a boy or flirt with him you come across as easy,this is not the case now but I still can't make the first move.Plus Im also afraid of rejection and making a fool out of myself.I'm not really good picking up signals from men so it's possible some could think I'm stuck up but I think I have forgotten primate mating rituals.

It is factually incorrect that women will not date shy men, if they know that those men are attracted to them and if the specific man has no other issues.

As for men 'not being selective,' guys, that's what the term means. it means that you don't care about the differences from one woman to another, as long as she's female.

So, BlueMax, when you wrote the following:

You weren't actually talking about your own personal experience?
OK. If that's the case, then I'm sorry for having caused you distress.

While the history may present some answers. I think what matters is that at the present it's simple math, more guys will ask girls for company. So most girls won't ask because they don't have too. It works just fine anyway, for girls.

But do guys even do the approaching? I can't remember the last time a guy approached me (IRL). If you guys are all doing all the approaching, and will date 100% of women, and we just have to sit and accept or reject, etc. etc. etc. then, errr... do I look like a man or something?

(I'm not having a whine, btw, I'm just disputing many of the claims made in this thread.)

well, In america at least. I don't know about other nations.

From my experience, yes, we do most of the time. To speak about it in broader terms, guys are generally expected to take the lead and be the ones who make things move ahead. Women's role is not completely passive as some people make it sound though, they usually drop hints that let it show that they want you to move things ahead, they can't be too obvious about it because it's still socially unacceptable for a girl to chase a guy, but the hints are there, stuff like extended eye contact and open body language, answering to touch and being willing to take your lead. We aspie men have a hard time picking up those signals, which puts us at a disadvantage. But if a woman likes you enough she'll keep dropping increasingly obvious hints, until eventually we catch one of them . Some women won't be that patient though, so to have a certain grade of success we aspie guys must either become proficient at reading those signals, which can easily take years (probably shorter if you focus on it, but there is other stuff to do out there apart from hitting on women ) or walk around blindly, without really knowing when is it appropriate to make a move or not (Not too long ago I had that problem; let's talk about kissing. Usually the guy is the one that takes the lead, and some women may get frustrated when they wanted to kiss the guy but he didn't do anything and didn't take their leads. Now I've got a better read on such things, and are more willing to take risks, but it would still be easier if women took the initiative more often. Sometimes they do, for good results)

Although you know, from what I've heard, the other side of the coin isn't that great either. At least I get the choice of chasing an specific woman or not, while when a girl goes after a guy, she goes against societal norms, she takes the risk of being seen as desperate or slu*ty, so they can't really do anything about it. Doing away with those cultural biases would be for the best, although I can't see that happening anytime soon.

rich shy guys don't count.
Yes, men really don't care if a woman is shy, nervous, has social anxiety, has asperger, has autism. Men can date all types of woman.
The only women I've know of that had hard time dating are woman with ocd but that because they were always washing their hands.
A man will notice a shy,nervous aspie women and go up and talk to her and ignore all of her flaws and go out with her.
A woman will notice a shy, quiet man and will right away thinks he has no confidence and can't defend himself and will not even
give the man a chance, because she doesn't want to put in any effort to form a relationship.
If women are so pissed by getting hit on by jerks and creeps and getting cheated on by players, then why don't do something about it and instead of just waiting around for some perfect man to show up, why don't women just go up to a man (in safe setting of course) and ask him out or least talk to him. do it in like class, gym. in safe area not to some random man in the mall.

I felt the need to add the bolded parts. At least shyness is within our control~

^^^

Is this your theory?
C'mon - you know I can scare off the best of them.

Also: In AUS guys do take the lead but it is often so subtlely / badly done that it's hard to figure out what's happening. It's not clear like in Colombia.
I know when a Colombian is hitting on me. I never know when an Aussie is.

Actually, you scare everyone but the best of them . That's very efficient, you know that?