What is "creepy"?

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quesonrias
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15 Jan 2011, 3:14 am

Mercurial wrote:

The perception of creepiness is simply a cognitive bias, an act of cognitive laziness, in the person thinking someone else is creepy. it's how they define strangeness or otherness they can't quite define but without having to think too hard about things that aren't immediately familiar to them. It just makes it permissible to their minds to dismiss a person who is different.

I went on a tear about this on a non-AS forum where a number of people were joking about a current public figure who may have AS himself who struck them as creepy. I posted a few videos of people with AS, including one of Alex Plank, and asked them if they thought those people were creepy too. Then I laid it out for them--that their "vibe" of creepiness was just them making intuitive and largely uninformed judgment calls on people whose eye contact, body language, communication style and appearance was unusual and undefinable to them. And then I compared it to the kind of thing people say about gay people.

Some people got the message. Others got defensive. But that was over two weeks ago and i have yet to see a single person on that forum call that public figure "creepy" since.

I honestly feel there are people who are truly creepy. There are those whose actions often indicate to me that they are dangerous beings, and on several occasions, I have been able to verify that these individuals truly had a history of being so. I'm not talking awkward, I'm talking seriously disturbed.

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Shebakoby
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15 Jan 2011, 4:07 am

I don't even know what creepy IS, in my experience.

nick007
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15 Jan 2011, 5:04 am

This is creepy

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r_U377vst5o[/youtube]

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Daemonic-Jackal
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15 Jan 2011, 12:52 pm

KenM wrote:

What I find funny is I have seen guys go up to girls they know and ask them out, the girl is not interested and says "get away from me, creep.". But if a guy that the girl likes goes up to her, does the excect same thing and says the same thing the creep did, and that's ok.

100% this. The real problem is individuals applying different rules for different people.

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cshey
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16 Jan 2011, 11:47 pm

I agree with Hale Bopp. I'm not shallow, so judging by one's looks doesn't come into play (well, maybe if they are lugging around an Uzi - LOL). However, if I get a vibe or feeling that my personal safety is at risk, that's when my internal alarm bells are sounding.

hale_bopp wrote:

Creepy is a vibe. It's a vibe to the person who thinks the other is creepy, that their personal space is invaded or their personal safety is at risk.

Here is my perspective: I'm rather petite, so if I feel threatened by a big guy or a group or angry dog or WHATEVER--even if it's MY mistake and I've completely misinterpreted innocent and friendly communication -- at least I'm being safe. I'd rather be alive and inconsiderate than be dead because I was too afraid to hurt the attacker's feelings.

In other words, I think there are biological mechanisms in place to help protect the species.

I hope this helps, or at least adds another dimension to the conversation

Ai_Ling
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17 Jan 2011, 5:27 am

I do agree that males are more often being seen as creeps. Admitedly, Im a girl and Ive never been called a creep to my face tho come to realize ive done some creepy things in the past. I was a girl doing these things mostly to guys, some girls too. The guys sometimes put up with it, other times thought I was weird. The girls thought I was just emotionally distraught and needed to be cared for. In a way I was that clingy little sister. On the otherhand, it I was a guy, I probably wouldnt have gotten away nearly as much. Ive read descriptions of creep, no lie thats pretty much what I was for emotional insecurity reasons. Because I was a girl, I got away with waaay more.

LordoftheMonkeys
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17 Jan 2011, 5:50 am

Grisha wrote:

You look like a child molester in the photo.

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LordoftheMonkeys
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17 Jan 2011, 5:58 am

By the way, I noticed you're in Orange County California. Say hi to introvertedguy06 for me, will you?

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emlion
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17 Jan 2011, 9:41 am

Jack Nicholson in the Shining is creepy.
Just don't try and kill your entire family and you'll be okay. :wink:

Grisha
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17 Jan 2011, 10:34 am

LordoftheMonkeys wrote:

Grisha wrote:

You look like a child molester in the photo.

That's not funny.

That photo was taken at Disneyland by my 5yo daughter

emlion
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17 Jan 2011, 10:37 am

Grisha wrote:

LordoftheMonkeys wrote:

Grisha wrote:

You look like a child molester in the photo.

That's not funny.

That photo was taken at Disneyland by my 5yo daughter

Pst, you do not look like a child molester!!

You just look a little serious if I HAD to pick a negative thing.

LordoftheMonkeys
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17 Jan 2011, 10:43 am

Grisha wrote:

That photo was taken at Disneyland by my 5yo daughter

You have a daughter? Surely you have had some success with women in the past, then. Maybe you should figure out what you were doing right at that time and then emulate it. I had the impression you were a virgin, like the vast majority of guys here.

The photo does look creepy though. You have this sort of "I'm going to get you" glare, and you're staring right into the camera, which means when people look at the photo, your eyes follow them around the room. That is pretty creepy in itself.

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Grisha
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17 Jan 2011, 10:55 am

LordoftheMonkeys wrote:

Grisha wrote:

That photo was taken at Disneyland by my 5yo daughter

I know I look a little "intense", but I thought it was more "Crispin Glover" creepy than something more specific.

Yes, I have a beautiful daughter, she is an absolute joy. Not sure if you can count a Russian mail-order bride as "success" though. And no, I'm not a virgin by a long shot, but it would be nice to have a relationship which lasted more than a month.

Actually, I've had a fair amount of success with that photo on OKC, believe it or not, but it certainly could use some improvement...

Moog
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17 Jan 2011, 12:34 pm

You have very white eyeballs.

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monsterland
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17 Jan 2011, 4:37 pm

Maybe it's my Russian background, and in former USSR people are definitely gloomier, but I see nothing wrong with your photo. I think it's a good photo and I do believe it can generate results on OkC.

Of course OkC is online dating, and online dating doesn't really work, but that's a different story.

hale_bopp
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21 Jan 2011, 6:10 am

You got a Russian mail order bride? Tell us about it. I'm interested to know how it worked.
Not a good idea to buy partners though.. they probably only want you for money etc.

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