A True Nice Person

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What i've worked out that if you are nice and you actually mean it, people will feel more comfortable around you and in some places such as the workforce, there maybe people willing to help and assist you more with your everyday jobs etc, but it's got to come from the heart, not the mind. That's what the difference is between a nice guy and a loser.

Absolutely.

I seperate the 2 versions of Nice guy to end the confusion.

Nice guy 1: Not really a nice guy at all but just trying to be nice just to use the woman for sex

Nice guy 2: aka Good Guy: a genuinly nice guy being nice just out of the kindness in his heart and wanting to do the right thing and wanting company and be there for someone.

So theres nice guy and good guy.

truly ugly people just don't finish. I am willing to admit I'm not super ugly but as I've been told I'm not attractive.
what about the not hot and smart ones cafeaulait? the plain looking and average intelligent ones.



whats boring to you isn't to others. I quite enjoy my simple yet interesting hobbies. Videogames, shooting, hikes, firearms, browser games, money collecting I really don't have time for them all. But hey they aren't exciting like, rock climbing, river rafter, mountain biking etc.

I don't consider my reason for difficulty having to do anything with me being nice, or at least I haven't experienced any rejection based on it. never had the I just see you as a friend. Which is where that mostly steams from yes?

not sure what a unattractive personality is? o.O

I disagree. There are many roads you can take and be successful without doing a single ruthless or unfettered thing, keeping your soul 100% in tact.

By all of society's standards my husband and I are quite successful. House, jobs, smart kids.

What we both are is very good at what we do. Professionally as well as when we choose to volunteer. We have respect because we've earned it by doing good work.

Will we ever be part of the 1%? No. Who cares? That much money isn't necessary and it certainly is not going to make you happy. Totally content to be part of the 10% or 25% or whatever it is we statistically fall out as.

I'm not saying your hobbies are boring. I'm talking about people's personalities.

People's personalities != Their hobbies.

A bubbly, friendly, funny person can like video games, as well as a bitter woman hater who can hardly make conversation, or doesn't even want to.

Your hobby must be icecream from your avatar everytime i see it I am craving an icecream cone!

Okay Hale_Bopp, What does personality mean then and what makes a personality appealing attractive to you?

I'm wild confused in all of this as to what exactly the operational definition of "nice" is.

I mean I'm pretty sure such a thing doesn't exist, but I'm lost on what the general perception of it is.

I'm "nice" to people in that I'm kind and respectful on a moment-to-moment basis, but I'm far from afraid of confrontation if it's brought to me and I'm pretty selfish by nature. (This is just to name a couple of many problems).

To me it's pointless to think I can outright suppress the negatives. They can only be understood and subsequently to a degree manipulated in a way where they hurt as few people as humanly possible. Basically I feel like a fundamentally bad person who is in a constant (and generally successful) fight to be "good".

So where do I stand?

Unfortunately, some people who actually are nice may not be able to present that way for various reasons. It does not change the fact that they are nice, however; it just changes how they need to approach dating.

To me, "nice" is anyone who tries not to hurt someone else, ever, and actually cares about people and the world. It can be combined with a variety of traits, and sometimes those other traits can make the "nice" more difficult to see, but if you fundamentally care about doing right by people and the world around you, then you are "nice." If you believe the way to survive is to climb over other people at any cost, well, then, you are not "nice" (although you still might be complex or interesting).

I actually find some personalities revolting and I like more to hang out with certain types of a**holes than people with those personalities, I think anyone can be an a**hole too.

Exactly. Only an Elliot Rodger could come up with a phrase like 'Nice guys finish last'.

^ was going ask too. o.O

When every i hear about how one guy is boring and one guy is exciting in dating context it has always been about their hobbies.
" he has a exciting personality, he does ______ and ______." isn't personality based off things people do and experienced.

I have never thought of someone's personality being boring or exciting, personality to me is stuff like being kind, romantic, funny, sweet, etc. those seem neutral.

A good personality in my opinion is someone who loves to have a laugh, enjoys talking about quirky and interesting things, is approachable and friendly, is laid back, non judgemental and doesn't take life to seriously.

That is my opinion, but the majority of the bell curve like these traits in people. I'm not saying everyone does, but from what I've noticed, it's these guys who never have trouble getting girlfriends, no matter what they look like, and these guys are nice people, as well.

Pretty much every guy I find easy to talk to doesn't have problems finding people to date, so it can't be just me who thinks like that.

Well Hale_Bopp all work and no play makes jack a dull boy, right? If we can't examine life itself, what is above and what is below then what is the point? If we live but we can't actually LIVE, then what is the point? Can you tell me the essence of life and existence itself?

What is life without a little fun right?


By the way will you do me a favor if you don't mind?

I'm trying to disprove the law of fives which says

The law of fives states simply that: all things happen in fives, or are divisible by or are multiples of five, or are somehow directly or indirectly appropriate to 5.

The law of fives is never wrong(also, never cabbage).

Can you help me to do it please if you don't mind?

Leo Durocher, a baseball manager, was actually the guy who first said "Nice Guys Finish Last."