Do some apsies run from a relationship when faced with one?

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Perhaps you enjoy the thrill of the chase more?

This is something ALL women are afraid of. This is why I realized it's best to wait for the guy to declare his undying love for you and ultimately wait and watch his actions like a hawk.
That might prevent confusion the next time.


You could be a commitment phobic aka scared of relationships. IDK, but there are books out there on the subject.

I don't even chase though... I'll just have a crush on someone for a while and be like, "man, that girl is awesome, I wish she liked me" and make feeble autistic person attempts to talk to her. Then it becomes obvious that she does like me, and all of a sudden a switch gets flipped and all I can see are her flaws. Maybe I just put people on pedestals when I have a crush on them, and then the real person can't compare to the perfect version of them I created in my head.

Maybe it is a commitment thing... I always think I can do better - do I really want to lock myself in and be with this girl forever? And I picture myself meeting some girl a few years later who is prettier, smarter, etc, and being jealous. There's always going to be someone better out there, so having a relationship with anyone feels like settling, I guess?

I guess this applies to almost every aspect of my life, too. I'm never satisfied with anything - always have to be stronger, faster, better, make more money, know more, do more, etc. The end result I'm headed toward seems to be that I'll be rich and really good at a lot of random things, but unhappy, unsatisfied and foreveralone. So it goes.

This is common the whole species over. There are too many possible explanations to list.

I would guess he was genuinely sincere and wanted a relationship with you, but the reality was too overwhelming, Aspies find constant connection far too tiring and need a lot of time alone.
I have the same issues with relationships and so try to avoid them to stop the Woman getting hurt.
I have also been diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder as the result of an abusive and neglected Childhood.
I do believe childhood abuse gives rise to the same symptoms as Aspergers, like wise maybe Aspies display the same symptoms as abused children who go on to develop RAD and cannot therefore form relationships, despite desperately wanting too.

After I finish with a girl I then fall for her and wish I was still with her, maybe if you wanted you could inquire from time to time about him and not burn bridges.

Sorry to hear about what you've experienced that has caused your Reactive attatchment disorder. I think because I was emotionally vulnerable at the time of meeting him, I let my guard down and possiblely invited a not so good person into my life and though we dated for a few short months, I believe I didn't understand that he had more issues than what I knew about.

I don't believe in burning bridges and I'm the type of person who if I ever cared for someone, I would never want it to end badly but unfortunately I think the bridge is none existent.

I chose the user name Loveurself because that is what I am going to do. I believe no matter what his issues were, he hurt me and I did not deserve it. I want better and deserve better and when the time is right I will find that because thanks to him, I know what to avoid.

He knows how to find me for an appropriate apology. He burned the bridge and I don't plan on being with someone or trying to be with someone who doesn't see the value in what I have to offer. I understand love and I know how to give it. Love is not about sex or about seeing what you can get out of someone or being scared because life is scary. I understand that because he has AS, that might affect the way he interacts with people and yes, he could have been scared, but scared doesn't give someone permission to be cruel whether he mean to or not.

I want more and as far as a bridge is concerned I honestly believe there was never a bridge.

Thanks for your post.

Last edited by Loveurself on 28 Apr 2015, 12:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.

You were in lesbians with him?

That was hilarious, I lesbian it. I never saw that movie. I am going to have to watch it.

Funny

I do not feel a desire to flee from relationships or prospective ones. While I do enjoy alone time and sometimes need it to recharge I do like the feeling of being in a relationship; provided I do like the person. It feels nice to share things with another and, if it gets that far, to open up your heart and soul. I do not mind clinginess, again, if I care for somebody.