SERIOUS help with online dating... PLEASE!! !

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You might be hideous, but who am I to judge? I’m not exactly an oil painting.

Though when people brag about their looks, I’m always curious as to whether they are deluded or not.

Alright, you got me... maybe I'll post a pic just for laughs.

And maybe they are liars, but I'd like to know the extent of their lies

I'll trade you pics then, mine for yours. We'll have an ugly contest... whoever loses has to wear an Elephant Man-esque canvass bag over their head for a week

Or is that whoever wins...??

Sure, why not. I’m not posting it, though.

^ Chicken....

OP has 24 hours to deliver the photo before he is officially stamped as a dingleberry.

Hey, why should I post mine when you're not reciprocating? If you wanna do this, gotta play by the rules...

I sent you a PM.

Sorry for the multiple posts, the site was freezing up on me :/

You deleted both of them.

I want to see n00dz.

Deleting posts is known to make the site go offline briefly.

(IMO there should perhaps be a notice somewhere about this. I have since stopped deleting posts even if I accidentally double posted, I now just edit it to say "2nd post made in error")

Here you go

I thought I'd follow up because I actually met someone on OKCupid that I really, really like, and vice versa (so much so, that we've both now deactivated our profiles), and I thought it might be helpful for you to know why, out of the many responses I received, I chose that guy.
Firstly, what I was looking for was someone who was interesting, honest, and attractive to me. He didn't have to be super-gorgeous. I wouldn't have minded if he'd been unemployed. I got plenty of responses from nice looking guys, so that wasn't the main thing that made him stand out. The main thing was that he sounded honest. He didn't pump himself up or paint a flowery picture. In fact, as I later discovered, he had down-played his actual accomplishments. He mentioned his interests and activities (music, writing), that he'd travelled around before settling in Vancouver, that he did carpentry to pay the bills, that he had an ambition to learn how to make pie by the end of the summer. He just sounded nice, and HONEST. One of things that stuck out in that respect was that his profile gave his height (5'4") and I thought a dishonest guy probably would have omitted that information. (Fortunately for me, I don't consider height important at all.) That's what got him a date in the first place. He was not the first one I went out with though. The first one didn't get a second date because I didn't find him attractive. He had posted an inaccurate profile pic. That was a big mistake. Don't do that! It might get you a first meeting but your date's first reaction to meeting you will be disappointment and you don't want that. I was extremely pleased to discover that my second date looked the same as his pictures. (He said he was equally relieved that mine were accurate too.) If you like, I can PM you with the complete text of our dating site interaction (with identifying info redacted of course) so you can see what actually worked.

Thanks for your response... unfortunately, no, it doesn't help at all and I doubt reading the actual conversation would either. I'm not surprised you found someone already, as I told you earlier you would before long. You had only been on a few days so you shouldn't have been complaining and ready to give up that quickly. You're female and dating sites (and dating in general) is going to be way easier for you.

I've been NOTHING but honest with people about who I am and what I do. That's what doesn't seem to work. Maybe other guys presenting themselves as sad sacks with nothing going for themselves works for them but maybe they're not autistic or cursed by God in that department. It would work no matter what they've said. And you only assume he was being honest- you only know what people tell you. I've been completely honest with everyone about the very humble life I lead, that (like your soulmate) I'm interested in writing, music, traveling, cooking, all that worthless, redundant s**t. If I were to try to boost my image with impressive-sounding lies, they wouldn't know whether I was lying or not anyway. That's what many other guys do and women believe them for the most part. But I've only changed my style of conversation and approach from time to time, I've never once lied about any aspect of my life. It worked for you and him because it was supposed to. It's not meant to work for me which is why I've given up. Everyone thinks they have the solution to this problem. I don't even care about this topic anymore honestly, and I'm considering deleting it at this point.