So, who here is a PUA?

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Guys, leave the poor service-industry women alone. They are tired of you scaring the crap out of them. Using them as unpaid therapists is dirt mean.

Practice your social skills in social situations. You know, parties. Bars with a lot of singles. Clubs centered around your favorite activities. Other places where people go to socialize.

We are sick you scaring the crap out of when you get us in a captive-audience situation. I only did one load of laundry yesterday because I was desperate to escape the attempts to chat me up. Cut it out. This sort of thing is exactly why women don't approach men more.

Now that I got that out of the way, here's a woman's take on PUA stuff.

It consists of a mix of two types of advice:

1. How not to act like an utter tool
2. New ways in which to act like an utter tool

This is deliberate. The purpose of PUA stuff is to get you to come back for more. The guys who write this stuff either hope to make money off you, hope to bask in your dudely admiration of their alpha status, or both. They're not going to give you good advice unmixed with bad, because then you'll be too busy having a love life to come back for more.

If you're socially astute enough to pick out the good bits from the bad bits, you can learn a lot from PUA materials. Most guys aren't, and wind up sounding like badly-written shell scripts when they try to use the stuff.

I just get an audio that I listen too, but more about confidence and morale booster stuff; i.e. Carlos Xuma, David DeAngelo, etc. The only real thing I got from reading a bit into PU-Artistry was in terms of how to dress. So, I took those basic dressing guidelines, and have my sister go shopping with me to help me out =)

I don't ever think I could become a PUA. I have too much of the old-fashioned sense of being a gentleman in me. But I don't certainly don't hate on any of the PUA's though. NLP might be something I should look into though sometime hehehe lol

I love the NLP-PUA guys! They perform some of the finest comedy I've ever seen! They've also got to be the most gullible people on the planet.

I forget how many times this scenario has played out among my friends:

1. Girl meets guy, they hit it off, things are looking promising, then guy does/says something extremely bizarre. Everything comes to a screeching halt.

2. Girl tells friends about it, wondering, "What on earth was that about?" After several attempts to come up with a rational explanation, all give up and conclude the guy must be some kind of freak. Laughter ensues. Cute, seemed nice, but turned out to be a freak. What can you do?

3. Days or weeks or months later, one of the group runs across an NLP-PUA script and realizes it fits what the dude did verbatim. Frenetic emailing and days of falling about with laughter finish up the story.

Until it repeats.

Not one, and have no interest in being one.

I am not a pick-up artist and all the pick-up lines
on the Internet are just junk.

What do NLP and AFC stand for?

I wouldn't consider myself a PUA by any means, but I've learned enough from the Community to become a fun, social person who other people like to be around. By the way, you don't need to pay for ANYTHING if you're trying to learn seduction--there are more than enough free resources online for whatever you need. I think as far as Aspies are concerned, becoming a true PUA might be out of the realm of possibility simply because by nature our brains miss things that even AFC neurotypicals "get." Big difference between being socially awkward and not having the neurochemistry to understand social dynamics!

A resource I think would be better than the Community for a lot of people on these forums would be

succeedsocially.com and datinggroundwork.com, authored by a guy with great insight and experience on what the Community can and cannot do as well as the steps necessary to become better socially.

As far as the original poster of this thread goes, you mentioned something about how once you kiss a girl you're both considering each other for a relationship. This is way, way off. Depends on the woman, depends on how you met her, lots of variables. Most women you meet in bars and clubs are not looking for relationships, but will makeout with anyone with decent game.

I was into the PUA thing for a couple years. It was a good learning experience, but I didn't end up sticking with it. The lifestyle just wasn't a good match for my personality. My whole life I have pretty much been the quiet, "uncool" guy who would prefer to sit by himself reading a book than being the life of the party. Being athletic & decent looking, I could often look the part of a cool guy, but it wouldn't take long for someone talking to me to tell I was a geek down to the core.

I got pretty good at building comfort and playing the push-pull game of seduction, so I was able to get laid, but developing an attractive lifestyle, qualification, & building a good social network were WAY to daunting to tackle without completely changing everything about who I was. I got the the point of being able to be a "social robot" (neil strauss reference), but nothing close to being a natural. I realized my limitations, became comfortable at the level I got to (which was a huge improvement), but realized attracting women without making a planned effort was simply not doable for me.