Do women simply just dislike Aspie men?

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20 May 2020, 6:23 am

Of course, mothers of autistic sons want women to treat these sons decently.

I’ve only had women, a few times, actively “seek me out” within my life of almost 60 years.

Last edited by kraftiekortie on 20 May 2020, 6:26 am, edited 1 time in total.

sly279
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20 May 2020, 6:24 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

dw.731 wrote:

He is a floor person, experiences anxiety and issues going to college (so may/may not finish), does not have a driver's license or car yet (says he has anxiety over the notion of driving)... i think his biggest obstacle will be being addicted to porn/using self satisfaction as a coping mechanism. That damages the ability to have further connections in a relationship, which he claims he craves.

So now you see a bigger picture, and i chose to allow myself to fall in love with him.

sly279 wrote:

dw.731 wrote:

sly279 wrote:

dw.731 wrote:

I said yes to being his girlfriend before he had his first job. He works retail now.

sly279 wrote:

dw.731 wrote:

He started his first job during the holiday season last year. November/December-ish. Ghosting could not be that, though... as he still shows pretty active in apps like Instagram. He just doesn't talk to me anymore after he said he felt like he made a huge mistake. To my NT mind, that means he must have lost interest.

sly279 wrote:

dw.731 wrote:

NT female here. I adored my ASD (20) boyfriend. I wish he would come back. He kept getting overwhelmed any time remotely I tried to talk about if there was a disagreement or he would disappear and not communicate he was disappearing... or if I felt hurt. The one time he did something inappropriate (used self sexual pleasure for coping) while I was texting him about some serious issues...

Any time since this year if I brought up something as calmly as I could to discuss, he would resort to "maybe it would be best if we broke up". Ultimately he ended it by not breaking up with me directly... 10 days later saying he felt like he made a huge mistake breaking it off... then ghosted me completely. Talk about giving abandonment issues.

Anyway. I loved his special interests. I learned his routines and I knew when to expect him to disappear (about 75% of the time). I loved his quirks, and I admired his truthfulness, although I would get frustrated at him skirting around issues sometimes, as it would seem deceptive. I embraced him for who he was. We were friends beforehand, although I felt an instant connection to him. Where he had a low self esteem, I admired what he hated about himself. We were together for almost a year.

Bottom line: We are out there. I thought the world of him.

Did he have a job?

I was meaning is women won’t even date me cause I lack a real job, so I’m not a real man.
Did you date him before or after he had a job?

Why not date a guy with real job and future?

I think that is a very silly question. For now it is a real job, could still continue to be a real job... and he has a future. Who are any of us to judge another.

Is he a manager? You said your an assistant manager, that’s different the min wage retail. My manager and assistant managers make middle class income.

It’s funny some women ask if I’m manager and when I say I’m just floor person they say no thanks.

In dating women are the employer and so they can judge suitors however they want.
I’m just going have to accept any woman if one ever decides to waste their time on me.

I’m sure if I was 18-22 and had a car it wouldn’t matter as much but most 30 year old men have middle class jobs, new cars and own their houses. I’m 32 and get disability and work 12 hours a week, when I’m 50 I’ll be on disability and working retail still. This is it for me. Though I won’t live to 50. I don’t see me living past 35. For someone like me life without love and companionship isn’t life. I don’t fancy existing for existing sake so that others can feeel good

So see sly, it sounds she liked a person in your same situation.

I don’t get why. I don’t get why other nt women date aspie me but never me. They come here crushing on apsie men who don’t want to date them, but never me.
I’m just not good enough. If only I was born non defective and could work a real job.

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sly279
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20 May 2020, 6:27 am

dw.731 wrote:

No I don’t. Just confuses me more.

Also for me and other aspie forever lone men porn is the closest thing to female companionship we’ll ever get. :cry:

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kraftiekortie
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20 May 2020, 6:28 am

I’m defective, and I have been working for 40 years. People know I’m defective, too.

The_Face_of_Boo
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20 May 2020, 6:30 am

sly279 wrote:

Don't underestimate the factor of luck.

kraftiekortie
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20 May 2020, 6:31 am

Luck DOES have something to do with it.

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20 May 2020, 6:31 am

I live in a defective country.

I am probably living in the poorest country on this forum.

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 20 May 2020, 7:45 am, edited 1 time in total.

sly279
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20 May 2020, 6:32 am

kraftiekortie wrote:

Of course, mothers of autistic sons want women to treat these sons decently.

I’ve only had women, a few times, actively “seek me out” within my life of almost 60 years.

Perhaps it causes them to re-evaluate how they judged men’s worth now that their sons won’t meet that and they wish their sons to have relationships. Based on their post it seems so. But how can they expect young women to do what they themselves didn’t?
The world and society is too shallow. I don’t think love exists. If it did once it’s been so polluted that it’s a hollow shell now.

Nt women come here posting how they seek out Aspie men.
It’s said Women flirt with men they want, that’s seeking out. Women never flirt with me.

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sly279
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20 May 2020, 6:33 am

kraftiekortie wrote:

I’m defective, and I have been working for 40 years. People know I’m defective, too.

Your not on disability and can only work 12 hours a week.

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kraftiekortie
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20 May 2020, 6:37 am

I bet, if you worked as a gun salesman, that you could work 40 hours a week. You know how to sell your guns!

Working in a retail place does not provide one with motivation.

sly279
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20 May 2020, 6:40 am

kraftiekortie wrote:

I bet, if you worked as a gun salesman, that you could work 40 hours a week. You know how to sell your guns!

Working in a retail place does not provide one with motivation.

No I can’t handle the stress of full time work. And selling guns is extra stressful. Mess up and you answer to the federal government, you have to tell people no and they scream at you and threaten you.

I’m defective subhuman. There’s no future for me. I’m unlovable

Being alone provides me no motivation to do anything
Why shower, why bother trying to lose weight, why bother cutting my hair, why bother washing my clothes m cleaning my room. Etc. no reason to do any of it.

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kraftiekortie
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20 May 2020, 6:47 am

If you don’t shower, you will get nasty skin rashes.

If you don’t clean your room, the mice will have a field day.

I wish I could cut my hair. No barbers open here in NYC.

The_Face_of_Boo
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20 May 2020, 6:50 am

sly279 wrote:

Why shower, why bother trying to lose weight, why bother cutting my hair, why bother washing my clothes m cleaning my room. Etc. no reason to do any of it.

A real man doesn't need to shower or clean!

Real men stink! Rawr! Like Tarzan.

kraftiekortie
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20 May 2020, 6:52 am

Real men don’t eat quiche :wink:

I shower, shave, etc because I don’t like myself to stink.

The_Face_of_Boo
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20 May 2020, 7:00 am

kraftiekortie wrote:

Real men don’t eat quiche :wink:

Then let me remain unreal.

BenderRodriguez
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20 May 2020, 7:35 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I am probably live in the poorest country on this forum.

I grew up in the system with violence extreme poverty - the kind where you go hungry - in a first world country. It took me a while to adjust to people who own expensive electronics and other luxuries describing themselves as "very poor". Times changed I guess.

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