Me and my Thai wife

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Yes, there is always that risk, but what I'm saying is that the consequences are greater for the woman if said consequences result in extreme hardship for the woman. And the magnitude of that hardship directly correlates with the significance of that risk.

That's precisely my point. Thank you for putting it much more concisely and eloquently than I could.

I can think of at least two things right off the bat as a counter-argument:

1) This assumes that there is no pre-nup agreement, and that the woman is even aware of the applicable Western laws involving how assets are divvied up in the event of a divorce.

2) Filipino culture still largely frowns on the concept of divorce. As one can imagine, this can only exacerbate the exploitation risk for Filipinas.

While I agree that you can only have sympathy up to a point, it is presumptuous to think that all of these women "know what they are getting into". People can read stories, but they don't really "know" until they experience it firsthand, partly because the stories may leave a rather distorted picture of the reality. AS folks in particular have this kind of thinking (knowing without understanding) a lot.

We're talking about anything-goes Thailand here, not dark Roman Catholic Philippines

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3wGBl2eoz_4[/youtube]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3wGBl2eoz_4

I'm sure that the man in this video married a prostitute--as I understand it, there are basically two categories of women in Thailand--prostitutes, and women who remain virgins until marriage.

Here are some scenes from Pattaya:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJ1qrO0ilAc&feature=related[/youtube]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJ1qrO0i ... re=related

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dwPkA2IuI8I&feature=related[/youtube]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dwPkA2Iu ... re=related

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zoZnsiIHJgA&feature=related[/youtube]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zoZnsiIH ... re=related

Yes, Thailand is the closest place to Heaven on Earth, to say the least...

Well that doesn't deter guys from going to the Philippines for finding wives, does it.

And all of the videos you have shown also apply to the Philippines or any other sex tourism destination. What you've shown is not unique to Thailand.

I also think you're going off topic by showing images about sex tourism, as opposed to long-term relationships with somebody from southeast Asia... unless you're being sarcastic.

No, we're still on the same topic. Wife tourism would represent a subset of sex tourism. And, he went to Pattaya. I found videos of Pattaya.

Actually, I think that Thailand is quite unique--the Philippines pales in comparison (as does the entire rest of the world, for that matter). Visiting the Philippines is like visiting some dirty Latin American country. There isn't a whole lot for a tourist to see. The whores pale in comparison to Thai whores. The food is nowhere near as good.

Thailand has beautiful beaches, mountains, amazing temples, elephants, and enough to keep you enthralled for several months.

The Philippines has adopted some of the worst of Spanish and American culture, including the American craziness for guns.

I could go just about anywhere in Thailand and never feel threatened. Not so in the Philippines.

I do get where you are coming from, but going from the perspective where there is no snakehead gangs involved, no human traffickers, they are personally marking themselves, they are also aware of the fact that they can't predict everything but are deciding to take the risk. Having lived in developing countries I’d wager that these people are not in the poorest, the least educated or the most vulnerable in Thailand. I’m not moralising. I personally not hot on prostitution at all. However if you have arrangements like f**k buddies in the west, it is crass to try and take the moral high ground and draw the line. Yes there is a degree of exploitation, the exploitation can be matched or piped, but it not always obvious who is going to end up on top. I don’t think whiskey is cool for doing it I think it is quite tragic IMO, however we just don’t know how happy the parties are with the arrangements. Any response by me or anyone is likely to be emotive.

If you compare this type of arrangement to those where people are coerced, abducted, trafficked, brutalised and raped and forced to work as sex slaves against their will, for the profit of criminal gangs, it is quite a bit different.

Again you are coming from the position of ignorance "what I don't know can't hurt me". Just because you let loose in Thailand, and people where hospitable, doesn't mean you are necessarily safe. Thailand has it fair share of criminal activity, terrorist militias operating within the country and spilling over the borders. Abductions are not that rare.

I get the impression that people are coming to the incorrect conclusion, that you can stereotype Asian women, and that makes them suitable for "aspie" men, and that Asian women are naive.

Foreigners can learn to adapt quickly to a new culture, and even overtake you socially.

"Stereotyping" is often regarded as a politically-incorrect process, but it happens all the time, and is frequently useful, particularly, for example, in marketing. Beer producers know that a lot of American men like to watch football on television, and that a lot of these same men like to drink beer. Hence, beer producers know to capitalize on this stereotype by broadcasting beer commercials during football games. Soap commercials are more likely to be aired during the day, during programs that women are more likely to watch. Cereal and toy commercials are more likely to be aired during cartoons, when more children than adults are watching. Some adult men who watch football may be uninterested in beer but interested in laundry soap and sugary cereals, but they are relatively few, and, of course, stereotypes do not apply 100% of the time.

Most Asians follow the stereotype (and cultural expectation) of wanting to support their parents (and brothers, sisters, and other extended family members) financially. Some don't follow this stereotype, but not following it can lead to very hurt feelings. Most Americans do not follow this stereotype, and, in fact, have a hard time understanding it.

Anyway, here is a documentary called "My Boyfriend the Sex Tourist", about a young Thai woman who has 2 children by Thai men, and who is actively seeking to marry a foreigner.

Part I:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ka9yJi0AcIY[/youtube]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ka9yJi0AcIY

Part II:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GrlMeTqR4bY&feature=related[/youtube]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GrlMeTqR ... re=related

Part III:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZSJN1-61HK8&feature=related[/youtube]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZSJN1-61 ... re=related

Part IV:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CYEJFmfxBSw&feature=related[/youtube]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CYEJFmfx ... re=related

Part V:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q3LxDTKid4Y&feature=related[/youtube]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q3LxDTKi ... re=related

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prostitution_in_Thailand

My personal view is that I have no trouble with this arrangement in general.

He gets a hot, young wife who tolerates his Aspie-ness, she gets a better life and some security for her family.

However, I see two major problems:

1. She won't be young and hot forever, so there better be more to the relationship than that.

2. Should divorce occur, the consequences could be severe for him. A prenuptial agreement would be difficult to enforce ("I was a young, poor Thai girl - I didn't understand what I was signing"). She could leave him for someone else and he would be facing a PERMANENT 40% pay cut (more or less, depending on the jurisdiction).

That would scare the spit out of me.

Those are thoughts that would put any man off of marrying any woman. From what I understand, California is pretty bad.

If you do a google search for "Thailand divorce", you will find a large number of horror stories.

But, if you look at the Philippines: http://jlp-law.com/blog/divorce-annulment-philippines/

Divorce is illegal. So, maybe Stinkypuppy has a good point there--marry a Filipina, and you may be less likely to end up divorced and impoverished.

The joke here is that in a California divorce, you divide everything into two equal halves - and then give both to the woman.

The basic premise of California divorce law is that women are helpless, unsophisticated and incapable of surviving without a man. How's that for a "liberal" state?

Well, women probably like it. That's what feminism is all about, isn't it?

Me liky thai curry