how important are looks to you in a partner?

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TeaEarlGreyHot
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14 Feb 2011, 11:27 pm

Esther wrote:
wefunction wrote:
I also don't like the "pretty boys" like Brad Pitt or Jake Gyllenhoweveryouspellit.


Wait now, wait now, let's hang on for one minute here. Jake Gyllenhaal is gorgeous! :mrgreen:

Which just goes to show that beauty is indeed in the eye of the beholder. So I'm glad wefunction doesn't like Jake. One less person to worry about in increasing my chances with him! :roll:


He's definitely a pretty boy. I have to say, though, I don't really limit myself based on whether someone is a pretty boy or something else.

The only thing I don't go for are muscular men. The lifestyle that goes with being muscular doesn't appeal to me.


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auntblabby
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14 Feb 2011, 11:49 pm

sal mineo was all that and then some.



Stellar
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15 Feb 2011, 8:36 am

Looks aren't that important. I'm more attracted to certain personality traits.



Grisha
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15 Feb 2011, 8:43 am

auntblabby wrote:
sal mineo was all that and then some.


I'm more of an Audrey Hepburn person myself, but I did visit the spot where SM was murdered once, such a stupid, tragic waste...



Bethie
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15 Feb 2011, 10:04 am

Not important at all.
I'd gladly marry an ogre if we loved one another.

When I see a man who's obviously put a lot of effort into his appearance,
it really turns me off of them,
because in my view if he'd go to all the trouble of buying/wanting/trying to get this or that hairstyle/clothing/physique he considers aesthetics pretty important,
and so wouldn't be attracted to me anyway.

If it's someone with natural "good" looks whereby grooming or styling aren't obvious,
I'm still kinda hesitant, because I assume they are still approached all the time by a bunch of women.

I was talking with a friend and he (very inuitively) mentioned that since I don't experience physical attraction (being asexual) maybe I don't have an aesthetic sense at all- and that's true. I simply am unable to understand the notion of applying aesthetics to human beings, whereas I can with architecture or paintings. The preferences I see most people espousing (tall men over short ones, thin women over fat ones) all seem so very arbitrary.


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Asp-Z
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15 Feb 2011, 10:23 am

Looks are quite low down on my list of priorities when looking for a partner.



nick007
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15 Feb 2011, 2:23 pm

I have low vision & look more like a troll than the Hercules on the cover of those erotic novels & I HATE hypocrites so looks are NOT important to me as long as she doesn't dress like a whore or looks like a plastic barbie-doll. I want someone who looks like a real person


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Wyborne
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15 Feb 2011, 5:52 pm

Unfortunately looks are a bit too high on my list. While I'm not looking for a super model or anything (I actually find a lot of super models to be unattractive due to their fakeness), I would still prefer a women who I find to be physically attractive. But that's not to say that I would date someone for their looks alone. If they were a nut job or if we didn't have anything in common, I don't think I would really find an satisfaction in a relationship like that. And that's where my problem is. I'm looking for someone with "the whole package" as it were (someone who I find attractive with a great personality and similar interests to me).

So basically I'm looking for someone better than I deserve because even if there's someone out there like that, there's hundreds of better options out there for her without the social baggage, more self confidence, better looks, etc and whatnot.

Never been on a date before in my life, if you couldn't tell.



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15 Feb 2011, 8:04 pm

roadGames wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
Not that important.

I'd rather be dead than date a shallow boring useless ars*hole.


A lot of women say this, but then boom, they're dating some tall, square jawed pretty boy. They'll attribute reasons like his personality and confidence as to why they like him, but in the end, they're dating him because he's sexy.



I didn't even read the rest of your post - I stopped here. I would indeed date a sqaure jawed pretty boy. ONLY if he had the personality, spiritual beliefs and passion that I am after. And its not common.

Stop making mass generalisations, you have no right to say we are dating people "because they're sexy" You have no f****** idea. Just because you're obsessed with hot girls, doesn't make the vice versa true.



hale_bopp
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15 Feb 2011, 8:06 pm

emlion wrote:
Quote:
A lot of women say this, but then boom, they're dating some tall, square jawed pretty boy. They'll attribute reasons like his personality and confidence as to why they like him, but in the end, they're dating him because he's sexy.


I stopped reading after this.


We must be twins!



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15 Feb 2011, 8:07 pm

Moog wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
Chronos wrote:
Space wrote:
I love "hot" girls... My dilemma is I have never had luck getting them! This is odd in a way, because I would consider myself to be a good match for a "hot" girl. I'm 6"2, muscular, nice eyes, have a well paying job, etc. I still have the AS downfalls though, and don't have many NT friends (so this probably affects my chances too).

I used to only want to date really attractive women, but I lowered my standards quite a bit so that I could actually get a woman. I'm not saying bad looking per-se, but average, and a few chubby women, "bigger", etc.

Right now I have a pretty cool NT girlfriend. She's 25, very intelligent (in her last year of veterinary medicine), and is not prudish (she loves sex). She is attractive, but definitely not one of the "hot" girls. Basically, she is looks-wise a good looking girl who is a bit bigger and could lose some weight.

My problem is, after all these years of no women and I finally get a girl who I can connect with on some level and wants to be with me, I still want a better looking one. Insane, isn't it?

How important are looks to you in your partner?


I think it's important that one be physically attracted to their partner, at least initially, and I don't think you should be with someone you aren't really attracted to, or would leave for someone who is more attractive. It's not really fair to either of you.

On the subject of "hotness" and women, much of what most men consider to be hot, the woman pays a good deal of money on and it takes her two hours to apply that "hotness" in the morning.

In other words, that which you are judging a woman to be hot by, is typically makeup, hair style, and clothing, even if you don't realize this. Often, men pass up what are actually quite pretty women, if they are not made up in a form they can recognize as hot.
This is kind of silly, because any woman can get made up.

Modeling agencies realize this, and so when recruiting, generally want to see women without their makeup on or hair styled. They generally choose tall women with symmetrical and well proportioned features, and clear skin.

Here's an example of models with and without makeup.
http://www.femininebeauty.info/fashion- ... ans-makeup

Here's Mariah Carey without makeup.
http://www.hollywoodcelebgossips.com/20 ... s-picture/

So you see, most hotness is an illusion when it comes to women.


Bingo. A lot of men are extremely ignorant to this. A lot of men think girls get out of bed in the morning with pretty clothes, fake tan, jewellery, straightened and blow waved hair, and makeup.

I see one guy say "I don't like girls who wear make up"

And the next second he's drooling over a girl who is caked in makeup and dressups, yet he thinks she's "not wearing makeup".

I can use my flat mate for example. She wears fake tan all the time.
She said to one guys shes getting fake tan and he goes "don't use that you will go orange and ugly" but the stupid plonk doesn't realise shes got it on all the time, and he thinks it's her "natural" look and it's hot. Dumb ****.


That's quite funny, blaming men for buying into the (essentially deceptive) glamours women cast on themselves. Isn't that the point?


Pretty much. Although it's frustrating as a woman to listen to that from guys when you know said girl is average or worse looking than you when she takes her face off and her glamour off. I guess it's a woman thing.

You'll probably say then why don't you put your face and glamour on? I only really wear make up for videos I make because I don't like the feel of it.



Kaybee
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15 Feb 2011, 8:10 pm

hale_bopp wrote:
emlion wrote:
Quote:
A lot of women say this, but then boom, they're dating some tall, square jawed pretty boy. They'll attribute reasons like his personality and confidence as to why they like him, but in the end, they're dating him because he's sexy.


I stopped reading after this.


We must be twins!


Triplets!


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hale_bopp
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15 Feb 2011, 8:17 pm

I've got a case study.

Katy Perry always looks glamourous and Pretty. Many of you might look at a semi natural looking pic and think shes not wearing makeup, when news break, shes caked in it:

Here is a picture I got were the guy who posted it said: "Here is Katy Perry without makeup" She looks very pretty, but sorry guys, shes wearing foundation, blusher, eyeliner mascara and probably lip gloss in this pic. In other words, a LOT of makeup.

Image

Uploaded with ImageShack.us

Here is a real picture of her bare faced. A lot of the guys around the world probably cried. But to me, this is just the bare face of a regular woman.

Image

Uploaded with ImageShack.us



Space
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15 Feb 2011, 8:18 pm

hale_bopp wrote:
I hope your partner dumps you, I feel sorry for her, does she know you're constantly shopping for someone else?

You sure are bitter. :?



hale_bopp
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15 Feb 2011, 8:24 pm

Space wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
I hope your partner dumps you, I feel sorry for her, does she know you're constantly shopping for someone else?

You sure are bitter. :?


I'm not bitter, I just think you're being a complete arse.



TeaEarlGreyHot
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15 Feb 2011, 9:00 pm

hale_bopp wrote:
I've got a case study.

Katy Perry always looks glamourous and Pretty. Many of you might look at a semi natural looking pic and think shes not wearing makeup, when news break, shes caked in it:

Here is a picture I got were the guy who posted it said: "Here is Katy Perry without makeup" She looks very pretty, but sorry guys, shes wearing foundation, blusher, eyeliner mascara and probably lip gloss in this pic. In other words, a LOT of makeup.


Here is a real picture of her bare faced. A lot of the guys around the world probably cried. But to me, this is just the bare face of a regular woman.

Image

Uploaded with ImageShack.us


She looks so much better without her make up. Make up is a f*****g lie.


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