venting and complaining about women

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Me & other guys are afraid to speak up because it is quick for us to get accused of being hateful towards women when we do. I've also noticed that the mods tend to get involved more when women are perceived as being attacked than when men are.

i am also accused quite quickly of bad things. i've gotten some spiteful PMs, and i have also been attacked on the forums. i've even had a group of males "warn" other males about me so that they could pile on me, en masse when i tried to be assertive on threads. but so what? it wouldn't stop me.

you keep trying to find some kind of strange loophole where it is not so bad for women on here, but it just doesn't wash. mods step in a lot because women get a lot of nastiness directed at them. men get a lot less of that directed at them, so it is much less necessary for the mods to get involved.

mods also do warn women too, you know. and even ban them.

As I always say, if someone thinks you've done something wrong, you've done something wrong.

I greatly welcome the possibility of conversation on love and dating issues with females. I do not often get to hear their point of view on these matters (it's a bit of a taboo). I know that I probably have some faulty ideas on how the gender roles in dating work, most likely because I don't really have much experience with that.

On the other hand, whining is to be expected. People here tend to have a lot of bad experiences with dating. Given that most people here are heterosexual men/homosexual women, most people here are interested in women and not in men. Hence, it is a simple matter of statistics to conclude that there will be more whining about women than about men (the only other possibility is that all women are awesome, which, sadly, does not appear to be the case) because most dating issues discussed here are with women. So I think that is acceptable. I do think, however, that we should always remain civil and open to corrections. I've learned a lot about women simply by reading posts made by females in these threads, and I am very happy with that.

So, in order to lighten the atmosphere here a bit, I would like to say "Thank you" to all you kind-hearted girls, women and lasses without whom this place would not be nearly as interesting.

Its very tame handbags at ten paces compared to the venting and complaining of both Everton and Man U fans about my football team, both online and irl.

Sit in the lower or upper Gwaladys Street end wearing red and white on a derby day at Goodison Park! I have a few times. Now thats real agro and where like many other places I learnt to deal with hostile situations.

Well there's a lot of wisdom in this saying If you can't take the heat, don't tickle the dragon.

Women tend to not do this nearly as much for some reason. But on the other hand, they certainly do tend to "nag" their partners a lot more.

This is honestly the strangest text block quotation structure I have ever seen.

So this is allowed? I come here every so often to let go of some anger and frustrations by venting and complaining, (if you want to call it that) and I get called a troll and get told to quote "f**k off".

Last edited by MR20 on 14 Aug 2011, 11:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Venting and complaining are only allowed if it's done in a manner which does not violate the terms of use....and venting and complaining posts should be placed in the Haven

& the members saying "f**k off" are not violating the terms of use This is all extremely hypocritical

I don't really have much of a gripe against women as much I do as people in general. The times I cannot fit in or socialize or connect with people, the time I feel like an outcast or freak or loser, I tend to blame people for not understanding or being nice enough to understand me and accept me for who I am. I might have some resentment towards a girl that I like for not liking me or not being interested in me, why other guys can connect with her socially, but no matter how hard I try I just cannot pull it off, and I feel resentment towards her. Am I wrong for feeling this resentment because she might be a b*tch and only talk to people whom she deems worthy?

It's hard to tell, because it's hard for me to put myself in other people's shoes, especially in a female's shoes because I know very little about them. It upsets me when girls I'm interested in talk to other people but won't even aknowledge I exist, and I wonder if I'm doing something wrong or not doing something I should to initiate and maintain a social connection or if it's just that the girl doesn't want to associate with me for whatever reason. I don't understand that part of the social thing.

I can understand why a lot of people, probably mostly men complain about women on here. They are almost bigoted against all women because of their lack of success with them. They fail and fail time after time with attempts with women and have no idea why, they just wonder what they might have done wrong or not done right. So they think the problem is with women because they feel they've done nothing wrong. While most of the time this could be incorrect, I think the Aspie guy's don't really know any better.

Should I feel resentment towards a man I find attractive, who's not attracted to me? Should I resent he has no interest in me even though I'm a nice, faithful person who would treat him well and make him dinner every night?

No. Of course not. If I'm not attracted to plenty of guys who are undeniably nice people and have similar positive qualities, why should I expect a man to be attracted to me just because I'm nice and have said positive qualities.

We don't choose who we're attracted to or why we are attracted to them, we just acknowledge that we are attracted to them for whatever reasons we are. So it's pointless to be upset with someone for not being attracted to you because it really isn't something they have control over.



They are not all that different from men. They are not alien creatures. The primary differences as far as romantic relationships go is that women have lower libidos, sex is more invasive for them and carries more risks so it is not as high on the list of priorities for them in a relationship. At the top of the list of priorities is usually a deep spiritual/intellectual bond with their partner. They feel secure when they know their partner's emotional status and how their partner thinks and so they're rather big on communication in a relationship.



Most of them on here should know better because they've been told better.

There's not much going for AS men then.

Actually I've known men with AS who share internal aspects of themselves rather well.

I can share internal aspects, but only if I trust the other person and (s)he is willing to take the time to talk about it extensively. I would expect both criteria to be satisfied in the case of a serious relationship.

It's all a matter of finding the right way to communicate. For some, it's text. For some, it's sound. Try and you might succeed.

glad to hear you have found some people to be kind-hearted on here - i agree.

just so you know, it's mostly straight women that post here, not homosexual women.

Yeah, I know, but I was thinking who would rant about women and that would be heterosexual men+homosexual women (+bisexuals, I guess), and I didn't want to exclude anyone. All I'm saying is that, on these forums, (heterosexual men+homosexual women)>(heterosexual women+homosexual men), so that whining about women>whining about men.

<--Math geek, sorry.