Board index › Coping in life › Love and Dating

Come on guys! Get qualifications!

Page 4 of 6 [ 81 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

spongy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2010
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,055
Location: Patiently waiting for the seventh wave

29 Apr 2012, 2:03 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
spongy wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
You should get qualification for yourself, not for getting girlfriends.

I have a master's degree, it didn't make me sexier, it didn't make me more visible.

What made me sexier is working out, yes...the looks part.


Its all about personal experiences and the great thing about them is that you cant make any generalizations from them.

I spent several years going to the gym several times a week.
One year I ended up school earlier than my friends and my mother kept trying to get me out of the house in the mornings, gym was near thought it deserved a chance. Somehow felt something great whenever I was exercising so I kept going there just because it felt nice.
During this two years I barely met anyone because I barely approached anyone.

A few months ago I was forced to drop the gym for three months.
It got me thinking about how much I depended on the gym as part of my routine and if depending merely on the gym was a healthy attitude.

I joined just about any club that was open to new members around tried to change my way of approaching people.
Thats the only thing that worked for me and Ive barely hit the gym lately(once in 2 months or something similar)


If you were just relying on the gym for socializing then yes, it won't do much good for long since it's not the best place for socialization (people are always busy there, not always easily approachable...)

I was just pointing out that personal experiences can vary a lot and theres no miracle solution.

At the time of the gym I had some sort of friends I met prior to joining and I depended quite heavily on them I guess even though it wasnt a healthy friendship by almost every standard. But I was tired of trying and being rejected and they were around and sorta accepted me so I sticked to that for a while without trying to meet any new people.
We´ve been falling apart for a while and I started thinking about meeting new people a while ago, the gym thing just made me see how unhealthy the friendship was for various reasons.



DW_a_mom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Feb 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 13,689
Location: Northern California

29 Apr 2012, 2:36 am

Joker wrote:
Having a college degree will not get you a girlfriend some girls date high school drop outs.


But it does increase the odds.

Here is the simple reality I see: while it has long been socially acceptable for smart men to date dumb women, even if people may wonder what the two could ever talk about, it is generally not socially acceptable for women to date men of significantly lower intelligence or education. As more and more women get advanced degrees, they will be looking for partners who also have advanced degrees.

Universities in the US are now admitting more women than men. The guys are going to have to keep up.

It isn't about money or anything like that, it is about being on an equal intellectual plane with your partner. Something women have traditionally valued more than men.

So. While an advanced degree isn't going to get anyone a girlfriend, not having one will make it even harder.


_________________
Mom to an amazing young adult AS son, plus an also amazing non-AS daughter. Most likely part of the "Broader Autism Phenotype" (some traits).


AussieMatty
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 21 Mar 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 404
Location: Townsville, Queensland

29 Apr 2012, 4:53 am

I totally agreed with your assumptions. This is how that ABS Australia has gathered information about qualifications is likely to increase odds for partnership.

It got to do with level of experience along with the intelligence and personalities.

For example, for my case, I study and enjoy sustainability stuff. To my level, likely partner would be similar to that or related disciplines such as ecology, biology, marine biologist, chemistry and related environmental stuff. This is one way how people meet, for going to workplace, club or similar field of environmental science places get a match! More compatibility of relationship goes with this case.

Hope anyone understand what I mean. Hope you guys agree as well :)



Chenjiringu
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jun 2010
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 93
Location: Sweden

29 Apr 2012, 5:18 am

Well I prefer guys who work with "manly" jobs, like truckdriver, carpenter or plumber.
My lover is a black metal-listening truckdriver with long hair and stubble and I absolutly love that.
So you don't need to have a degree to get a girl.



Subotai
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Sep 2010
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,036
Location: 日本

02 May 2012, 3:00 am

Chenjiringu wrote:
Well I prefer guys who work with "manly" jobs, like truckdriver, carpenter or plumber.
My lover is a black metal-listening truckdriver with long hair and stubble and I absolutly love that.
So you don't need to have a degree to get a girl.


Totally! Many girls share your preferences

Qualifications are not an accurate measure of intelligence, knowledge, or drive.


_________________
...and his prowess on the battlefield is surpassed only by his skill in the bed chamber.


The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,664
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

02 May 2012, 4:06 am

spongy wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
spongy wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
You should get qualification for yourself, not for getting girlfriends.

I have a master's degree, it didn't make me sexier, it didn't make me more visible.

What made me sexier is working out, yes...the looks part.


Its all about personal experiences and the great thing about them is that you cant make any generalizations from them.

I spent several years going to the gym several times a week.
One year I ended up school earlier than my friends and my mother kept trying to get me out of the house in the mornings, gym was near thought it deserved a chance. Somehow felt something great whenever I was exercising so I kept going there just because it felt nice.
During this two years I barely met anyone because I barely approached anyone.

A few months ago I was forced to drop the gym for three months.
It got me thinking about how much I depended on the gym as part of my routine and if depending merely on the gym was a healthy attitude.

I joined just about any club that was open to new members around tried to change my way of approaching people.
Thats the only thing that worked for me and Ive barely hit the gym lately(once in 2 months or something similar)


If you were just relying on the gym for socializing then yes, it won't do much good for long since it's not the best place for socialization (people are always busy there, not always easily approachable...)

I was just pointing out that personal experiences can vary a lot and theres no miracle solution.

At the time of the gym I had some sort of friends I met prior to joining and I depended quite heavily on them I guess even though it wasnt a healthy friendship by almost every standard. But I was tired of trying and being rejected and they were around and sorta accepted me so I sticked to that for a while without trying to meet any new people.
We´ve been falling apart for a while and I started thinking about meeting new people a while ago, the gym thing just made me see how unhealthy the friendship was for various reasons.


My current 'friendship' that was developed thro gym and not too sure if I have to call it such isn't the healthiest either; hmmm but talking about it would be too off topic here.

Also note that it's very important to have friends of your own gender too, friendships with the opposite gender tend to be limited in activities' "flexibility", as I recently started to notice.



Chenjiringu
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jun 2010
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 93
Location: Sweden

02 May 2012, 5:35 pm

Subotai wrote:
Chenjiringu wrote:
Well I prefer guys who work with "manly" jobs, like truckdriver, carpenter or plumber.
My lover is a black metal-listening truckdriver with long hair and stubble and I absolutly love that.
So you don't need to have a degree to get a girl.


Totally! Many girls share your preferences

Qualifications are not an accurate measure of intelligence, knowledge, or drive.


Agree! My love is far from stupid, he's actually smart (and much better at math then I am), but he isn't a teoretic person. He prefer to work with his hands and body, and actually so do I. I do like to read and have friendly discussions about things, but when I will get a job I would prefer a more "hands-on" type of job... like garderner, carpenter or art therapist.



ValentineWiggin
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 May 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,907
Location: Beneath my cat's paw

02 May 2012, 8:20 pm

Delphiki wrote:
I think part of it has to do with interacting with people you own age at college. So if you jus sit in your room the whole time it won't really help

...don't people (most) do this in high school, though? :scratch:


_________________
"Such is the Frailty
of the human Heart, that very few Men, who have no Property, have any Judgment of their own.
They talk and vote as they are directed by Some Man of Property, who has attached their Minds
to his Interest."


Joker
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Mar 2011
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,593
Location: North Carolina The Tar Heel State :)

02 May 2012, 8:24 pm

DW_a_mom wrote:
Joker wrote:
Having a college degree will not get you a girlfriend some girls date high school drop outs.


But it does increase the odds.

Here is the simple reality I see: while it has long been socially acceptable for smart men to date dumb women, even if people may wonder what the two could ever talk about, it is generally not socially acceptable for women to date men of significantly lower intelligence or education. As more and more women get advanced degrees, they will be looking for partners who also have advanced degrees.

Universities in the US are now admitting more women than men. The guys are going to have to keep up.

It isn't about money or anything like that, it is about being on an equal intellectual plane with your partner. Something women have traditionally valued more than men.

So. While an advanced degree isn't going to get anyone a girlfriend, not having one will make it even harder.


True but I am not a college student and have no problems getting dates :wink: with the ladies or boys lol but I am a pretty smart guy the girls at my church love me for some reason I am pretty blessed with that too.



ValentineWiggin
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 May 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,907
Location: Beneath my cat's paw

02 May 2012, 8:38 pm

Joker wrote:
DW_a_mom wrote:
Joker wrote:
Having a college degree will not get you a girlfriend some girls date high school drop outs.


But it does increase the odds.



True but I am not a college student and have no problems getting dates



~facepalm~


_________________
"Such is the Frailty
of the human Heart, that very few Men, who have no Property, have any Judgment of their own.
They talk and vote as they are directed by Some Man of Property, who has attached their Minds
to his Interest."


Delphiki
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Apr 2012
Age: 183
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,415
Location: My own version of reality

02 May 2012, 8:46 pm

ValentineWiggin wrote:
Delphiki wrote:
I think part of it has to do with interacting with people you own age at college. So if you just sit in your room the whole time it won't really help

...don't people (most) do this in high school, though? :scratch:


Oops didn't explain enough. I meant extra curriculars. For example you like ultimate frisbee you join a club or team. Yes the same can be said about highschool too. I didn't say that I thought what I put was the biggest reason, I was just saying I thought it was part of it. Which now sounds dumb :(. I might as well have said tying your shoes is an important task for the start of your day.


_________________
Well you can go with that if you want.


ValentineWiggin
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 May 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,907
Location: Beneath my cat's paw

02 May 2012, 8:47 pm

Delphiki wrote:
ValentineWiggin wrote:
Delphiki wrote:
I think part of it has to do with interacting with people you own age at college. So if you just sit in your room the whole time it won't really help

...don't people (most) do this in high school, though? :scratch:


Oops didn't explain enough. I meant extra curriculars. For example you like ultimate frisbee you join a club or team. Yes the same can be said about highschool too. I didn't say that I thought what I put was the biggest reason, I was just saying I thought it was part of it. Which now sounds dumb :(. I might as well have said tying your shoes is an important task for the start of your day.


Not if you wear CUTE SANDALS!! ! (Or uncute ones, whichever.)


_________________
"Such is the Frailty
of the human Heart, that very few Men, who have no Property, have any Judgment of their own.
They talk and vote as they are directed by Some Man of Property, who has attached their Minds
to his Interest."


Joker
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Mar 2011
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,593
Location: North Carolina The Tar Heel State :)

02 May 2012, 8:49 pm

ValentineWiggin wrote:
Joker wrote:
DW_a_mom wrote:
Joker wrote:
Having a college degree will not get you a girlfriend some girls date high school drop outs.


But it does increase the odds.



True but I am not a college student and have no problems getting dates



~facepalm~


Really wish I understood sarcasm :lol: but I don't :P



ValentineWiggin
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 May 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,907
Location: Beneath my cat's paw

02 May 2012, 9:26 pm

Oh, I was being 100% serious.


_________________
"Such is the Frailty
of the human Heart, that very few Men, who have no Property, have any Judgment of their own.
They talk and vote as they are directed by Some Man of Property, who has attached their Minds
to his Interest."


Joker
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Mar 2011
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,593
Location: North Carolina The Tar Heel State :)

02 May 2012, 9:31 pm

Oh so you was being mean :shameonyou:



Guybrush_Threepwood
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Dec 2011
Age: 46
Gender: Male
Posts: 547

02 May 2012, 9:34 pm

Hello Ms Wiggin :)

I like your Avatar cartoonie thingie...did you draw it yourself?

I don't think you are being fair in your response to Joker...he was simply stating that in his personal experience he has no issues getting dates and he is not a college student or graduate.

You yourself have drawn upon personal experience to detract from the validity of statements on this forum...and I don't think anybody slapped themselves in the face in frustration...or announced the event.

Haha...'stupidface'....I like that....


_________________
"Have you got it, yet?..."
Syd Barrett