What's the point?

Post Reply New Topic

your lost in your self and own lack of faith in your self, i can say no more.
go find out the truth for your self, find your own reason and your own way.

That would explain why sociopaths(ASPD) always have huge egos, and they're are often womanizers too.

does not matter, all that matter is what females expect from their males, EGO.

Did you try to go to places where people tend to not go in groups? Clubs, Restaurants, and such are places where people go with a preexisting group, so perhaps try to find a location where people tend to go while not being a set group. Maybe some kind of charity gig like habitat for humanity, or something like that. Also, you can join groups/social clubs that aren't about economics. I'm an econ nerd myself, but I've learned that bringing up the interest rate on Spanish national debt and the possible implication that has on the valuation of crude oil and thus oil companies and by extension the supply business is not a good idea.

Well I've tried volunteering before in 2010 but I didn't make friends with anyone, and I'm signed up to volunteer for this thing called "art walk", where I sit on the block and I watch the artists stuff when he's gone, but I don't know if I'll meet anybody there just sitting at an artists booth. Maybe during orientation? Nah, wishful thinking like always Chris. I stopped volunteering a lot because I did volunteer a lot at one point and I never met anybody. If you can visualize me, alone, every day, doing things. That's my life. And it has been for a very long time.

Try volunteering in different places, like the places where people get assigned community service (no joke).

The bridge period between school socialization and adult world socialization is brutal
The whole game changes and for people like us who have social difficulty it can be extra hard.

It's frustrating and seems stupid but in my experience one of the best ways to meet new people is with at least one other person.
But if the whole issue is having a hard time finding friends how do you find someone to help you meet more people?

Do you have any cousins or family members around your age?

No. I have a great grandma and an aunt but that's all the family I have. I use to have a cousin I enjoyed hanging out with, but ever since he began criticizing my ideologies and degrading my lifestyle at "family dinners" which are no longer existent, we don't hang out - at all, anymore. I'd like to go for a beer with him and get some food - i'd like to do this with about anybody who's interested in what I am, yet it seems close to impossible at this point. I really do hope something changes in University. Theres this two day event with music and stuff and on the poster it says "MEET NEW PEOPLE" so I really hope people try to embrace that, because I will be alone but I will try my hardest to approach people like I always do. Yet I get this feeling I won't meet anyone at the event, but I might meet somebody in my class'? I'm only in two this year, and two next year. So I REALLY hope that two classes can produce SOMETHING

A class can be a good environment to meet people.
fingers crossed for discussion classes and group projects

Not something you should talk about with people you are just meeting, even if it's something you find interesting. Generally, the things you should be talking about with strangers should be stuff that is a little more casual and light-hearted, like the weather, or how you can't wait to make a pie with the blueberries you just bought.

Reading your posts, it sounds like you may be experiencing difficulties with your mood. I'm not a doctor, but I do go through bouts of depression at time, so I can recognise the signs. It would be a good idea to check in with your doctor and tell him about your concerns. If you're even *thinking* about suicide, it would be in your best interests to do this.

It would also be wise if you lessen the focus you have on girls and focus more on interacting with people in general. This is important, no matter how attractive they are.

I find that if a guy is alone and starts approaching girls without talking to anyone else, that he is more likely to be labelled as "creepy". You need to quit your tactic of approaching a girl or group of girls out of the blue. Even if you have good intentions, they will more than likely brush you off because you are alone, and they see no reason to start randomly talking to you, no matter how good-looking or friendly you are. It is important that if you are out, that you be introduced to girls via someone else, so that they have a sense of trust talking to you (in that you are approved by the other friend who knows you).

In order for you to get a sense of connection, try to establish friendships with guys first as they will be less intimidating to you. Something as simple as approaching a guy in your classes and having conversations with him can help build up a friendship, or try a club with your interests at school. This is important because if you become friends with a guy, chances are he will introduce you to some of his friends...and some may be women. This is how I met my own boyfriend (through a mutual friend who I had known for a long time). This tactic works for either sex because when people are already friends, they build up a sense of trust in each other to the point where they are willing to get friendlier, and perhaps flirt if their personalities click. Do not broach the subject too soon though, or you will appear desperate and people may tease you.

I hope all of this advice helps...and do take it! I wish the best for you.

Why do people like you always tell me to check with my doctor when there's ample evidence available that the doctor is merely a paid position to push drugs nowadays as aside from the actual compassionate care they once distributed years ago. If anything I seriously need to get laid and or smoke a joint.

And did you not read the posts? Like are you blind or something poster above? I've stated NUMEROUS times I want to interact with people over baseball talk.

And are you seriously telling me that guys approaching girls for the intent of getting laid doesn't happen? I'm not even doing it soely for that purpose - I would like to see a girl. I'm sure this happens. Im sure guys approach girls and they end up seeing each other. Your advice is horrible, it sounds like you just waited for something to happen - which is what happened exactly and your boyfriend ended up lucking out. Good for you.

I can already tell how spiritually awakened you are - not very, because somebody like you is always willing to give advice no matter how sh***y it is just to give advice and feel like they helped somebody.

Bringing up the CD party sounded like she was wanting to invite you there. Maybe the way you took her changing the conversation subject or the way you responded to "You know them, right?" scared her off from inviting you.

I think you may have trouble with interpreting social cues. I'm seeing a lot of negative interpretation of well-intentioned comments. I did that too.

It's hard to know what help you need, because it's an internet forum, so no one can see how you interact in real life. But perhaps talking social cues over with a counselor would help. That would be more helpful than anything I can guess and infer about your life. A good counselor tends to be good at picking up on how you interpret things, and if it's on par with the real world. They can also help you think about social scenarios in a different light.

In my experience, counseling is offered for free at university.

Well we actually didn't touch on the CD topic until I guess I basically intruded my way into her daily life by talking about my book. I guess I should just shut up and let people live their life until I ascend.

You definitely have a distorted view of how "normal" relationships get initiated. You're probably watching too much TV. Guys try to get laid all the time - it's part of their charm - but when a lone guy walks up to a girl regardless of his intentions he seems creepy.

If your avatar is your real picture then I can honestly say you're a really cute geeky guy (that's a compliment). Girls will be attracted to you, but only when you make yourself socially presentable. I never had close friends. I had groups of people I hung out with. That's all you need. Just a group you associate with. Keep conversation light and relevant to whatever scenario you're in. Think of the blueberry example another poster cited where you tried to talk about something not related to the scenario of buying blueberries, where you should have said how the blueberries would make a great pie or whatever, or you could have talked about the weather that day. In-depth discussions need to be saved for a time when you have become close to someone. It's not for strangers.

Yeah you are good looking and geeky

It's good that you initiated the conversation. Perhaps she may not have been interested in your book, but she still wanted to talk, so she changed the subject to something you can do together. Don't give up You have good intentions as well, it's just that many NT women may not understand that at first.

You don't understand, when I say EGO I meant that females are attracted to a confident male that seems to have their act together. name brand cloths, shoulders back and being prideful, nice car, the way you walk and talk, etc,, then flavor that with interesting personality reflected in that of your own interests and hobbies. was not talking about being an ass. if you make them think you have something they want, that your a good catch and you know it, then they will want to get to know you.

BUT they like to feel they have to earn you so make them have to show interest first. if they take an interest they will try to get your attention in ways that will prompt you to hit on them. subtle flirting to see if there is any chemistry going. smiles, brushing their hair back, even trying to start a conversation with an innocent question, like, do you know where I can find so and so book, or hey, what book is that your reading, looks interesting! get the idea?

Watch for how they dress. if they are in the times of the month that they are not interested in looking they will dress differently and try not to be as attractive. on other times they will show how open they are to being hit on by trying to be more attractive. just don't let it confuse you of them dressing to deal with their own hot flash's.

I used to have tons of problems trying to get to know females and get into relationships, I prob was worse then you. but now I find it fairly easy. its that of maintaining relationships that I have a problem with now, they get board with me fairly quick. in other words, once you know what they are looking for its easy to put on face to get their attention, but its not so easy once you take that mask off. once you learn its easy to be that player.

Do like I did, I read tons of books on body language between the sex's. read all kind of relationship and dating articles, go to dating websites and read the forums.

One of the things you need to realize, is just like females get sick of being hit on (by the men they have no interest in), they also get to explore what kind of men they find unusual, they are board of Mr average because they have many more options then men do, they want excitement or something unusual. and sad to say, MANY are looking for someone that will make "them" happy, its a co-dependency thing, instead of just finding someone to be happy "with". you can use that to open doors. although its best to avoid those who expect you to provide them with their own happiness because they will always be dragging you down, instead of being there for each other together.

Also, females are vary vain, even if they look like a super model, they still worry about most every flaw. even though they look pretty they still feel vary flawed. you can use that.

They find Mr safe nice guy boring and want excitement. and they expect men to provide that expense for them. use this tool to your advantage.

Just don't get caught in the same trappings I did, its easy to give them their illusions, but its hard to maintain them. they have high expectations, esp when they are pretty and know it. women force men to be players just to get a crack at getting to know them, then complain when they find out were are not what they wanted. ignore this, for if you don't try then you will never get anywhere. its a numbers game till you find that right one. women hate being objectified, when they do it to us all the time. they force us to become players just to get the chance to get to know them. they feel they are not like the rest, when they do not see or understand the numbers game we have to play just to find that right one. they as a whole, force us into it. they are the acceptors or rejectors, while we have to deal with all the rejection.