Almost 30, single, and worried about never finding love

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You are just operating on a different timeline. Many people I know got married in their 20s and are getting divorced one by one. When you find the right one, you will be glad for your inexperience and will cherish your relationship all the more. I would have never thought that in 2016, I would probably be the only one of my cousins to be happily married, especially since 3 years ago I was the only one not in a relationship.


Complete and utter BS. I can tell you from mine and others experiences that the advantage swings towards men (especially aspie-like men) around 30. I have the numbers to back it up: 1 date at 28, 3 at 29 and when I reentered dating 18 at 31 and finally 3 at 32 (one month). It was far easier to get dates, sleep with women and the women were more marriage/family minded.

well... yeah... I am not going to lie I feel that too. but for the most part, I am not disappointed that I wasn't a thing with any of those people back then (they turned out to be wrecks later) but its not so much that, its knowing that I missed a serious milestone in growing up that nearly everyone around me has passed and had wonderful experiences becasue of it. experience I have yet to have, and still might never have.

I'm 36 and have never dated anyone. Used to be something I worried about and stressed over, now not so much. I guess I've just gradually accepted it. It's not that I've made some grandiose statement that I've forever given up on it, I just have zero expectations.

I'm an Aspie and my timeline is that I started dating in high school.

Ya and i'm sure the circumstances would have turned out differently if I was born a woman

Hard to believe this thread I made has gotten as many post as it has. I still have my worries, however....

likewise

And I realize that I am not alone on this front.

ya, oh well, nature and biology was never meant to be fair and nice

That's a rational way to think about it!

To say this site has been a Godsend would be an understatement. I literally thought there were only a handful of people in the world who had the same experience I did. Coming here showed me I was not a freak, not unusual and things would eventually work out. When I started formally dating at 28, I was a fish out of water. I had no idea what I was doing, was totally oblivious to romantic cues and probably let countless 'obvious' flirting signals pass right by. I only went on a single date and that felt more like a pity date because I cornered her and asked her point blank to meet up.

Now, I am engaged, dated 30 women, slept with 4 (wish it was 1), was in a relationship with 2 others and can now easily tell when a girl is interested in me, when she is single and when to how to be 'rough' and dominate while still still being kind and sensitive. I went from a 30 year old virgin to someone can easily initiate sex.

The number one thing I learned from dating is that there is NOTHING is wrong with me and many of the rejections were nothing to do me but usually her issues. Some were abused by men violently, some have extreme anxiety, some are spoiled princesses who are delusional, one said I looked like her ex and at least two had signs of Borderline Personality Disorder. Most rejections are quite frankly because you aren't like her parents and there is nothing you can do about it.

The single biggest mistake of my life was staying with an abusive, crazy person because I had such low self-esteem. Build that internal confidence and these women will feel like the toxic people they are.

I'm 53 and have never had a gf or a job. I need a job so that I'm around people and I might get noticed by a decent woman. I spend far too much time alone and need to get out into the world.

really, so you lost your virginity at the age of 30?

Yes, it was just shy of my 30th Birthday. It was only a couple of weeks prior that I got my first kiss or 'intimate' touch at all. Now, I could not even tell you my 'count' because it's in the triple digits (mostly with two) and that's with a low libido.