Males with aspergers - STOP BEATING YOURSELVES UP!

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Having Aspergers makes us all unique and special.
Having Aspergers makes me, me.
Having Aspergers makes you, you.
The critics/deniers/sceptics of Aspergers can all go straight to HELL!
Ignorant and intolerant people should keep their negativity to themselves.
How dare they discriminate against Aspergers!

I have Aspergers.
You have Aspergers.
Aspergers makes us all unique and special.

hehe, somehow you are right about this.

Don't forget that most of us Aspie men finally hit mental puberty around age 19.

I didn't hit mental puberty until my early 20s. My few friends figured out I was diverging from them before I did. For some reason I was not very self-reflective or at least able to make sense of it. I can still remember some of their comments today, and value them, because they give me perspective today on where I was at, and how I appeared, during those years. Some of them still ring true today.

I certainly learned what to do and what not to do over many years but that was quite a bumpy learning curve. I look back on my many mistakes today and just think, "wtf was that about?".

I still didn't hit my mental puberty.

By that I just mean that I was actively pursuing women. I was still rubbish at everything and that didn't change for years. Of course now I'm perfect in every way.

Lol, then the problem is they have no chips to bargain with - so you end up gloriously single rather than ingloriously.

I'm not single.....nor perfect. But if I learned, so can others. My deficits were not subtle.

Ok to the people spouting their so called optimism in this thread, tell me do I have any chance of dating a good looking woman.

Let's see:

I'm ugly, I'm poor, I just turned 25 and I still live with my parents.

I have no friends and I spend most of my time in my house playing video games and anime.

I'm perceived as slow and dumb, I dropped out of HS in the 9th grade while in special ed, so I have no hope or prospects for a good future.

There is no hope for people like me, I'm so sick you idiots thinking it's our fault! We can't help the way we are.

The unspoken reality: you don't have a right to be angry about that. In a sense though its no one's fault - we'd need a world full of princess and princesses and nothing but for everyone to get an equal shake in this department. If it makes you feel better I'm 31, at home, will very possibly never be in a relationship, and that despite having work success and reasonably passable social skills.

Will you be angry about it regardless? Probably but, keep in mind, that it's one of those emotions that spins your wheels - nothing else.

Life isn't fair. I'm not implying otherwise. But you shouldn't assume that everyone with deficits is identical to you either. There is a range and some who are behind today can catch up later.

you're wrong about something. i am NOT "optimistic" for your opportunities if you judge women so shallowly and yet expect them to give you a chance. it's interesting for you to have such high standards.

maybe you think you can't help the way you are, but you can definitely help your chances. there are some things in your list that are well within your control. one of them is the amount of time you spend with your anime and video games. another one is your standards.

So you think I have a chance with average looking or mediocre looking women? BTW I didn't mean it to sound shallow.


And I'm not giving up anime and video games. They have been mainly my only joys since since my early teens.

however you meant it, it was shallow.

how many ugly women have you asked out in the last year? forget mediocre if you think you are that ugly. personally, i don't consider anybody ugly, but since you characterised yourself that way, i guess that ugly women would be your best bet.

i agree with you that if you keep your life exactly as it is, you will have little to no chances with women. there's nothing wrong with taking comfort in your anime and video games, but you may as well put aside the bitterness as it is only making YOU suffer.

i don't really get what your point is - you're not trying to get a girlfriend and it seems like you don't think you deserve one anyways. so why do you care if we are optimistic for other people? their situation is not like yours, and perhaps they haven't given up hope.

you can feel however you want, of course. there's just no point in bitterness unless you want to make yourself suffer more. your anger doesn't touch us at all, so if you want to lash out it won't work. it's like a boomerang that will bypass us completely and come back to hit you squarely in the head and heart and soul.

EDIT: it is my personal philosophy that nobody is justified in being angry at entire groups of people for the actions of the few. and... it is a little unfair for you to think your problems or your experiences are so much worse than anyone else's. suffering is practically a guaranteed part of the human condition.

Last edited by hyperlexian on 18 Jul 2011, 6:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.