Have you NEVER had a girlfriend. If so, why?

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I was only in one short-term relationship ever, only kissed four girls, and had sex with one. It wasn't until this past year that I've really realized why. Before this year, I stuck with one girl for months on end and nothing would come of it. It was an unhealthy habit of mine. I can see myself getting into a relationship sometime next year though because I've become more active.

I am a 27 year old virgin. Never been on a date, kissed, etc.... I've hardly even spoken to or looked at girls!

I have a high-average libido, so the sexual interest is there - but I just don't like being around people. Also, I realize that to ever have a "relationship" I would have to jump through so many hoops* it would be impossible.

It's so irritating desiring something you can't have. Every time I look at a pretty girl (even logging onto this very site!) I feel simultaneously angry and horny. I would like to just turn my libido off, but maybe aging and poor health will do that for me...

*social skills, employment, independence, experience, etc etc

Don't have a naturally extroverted, dominating, confident sort of personality. Wouldn't really feel comfortable with having to be the first to interpret and initiate all physical intimacy. In general, I'm come across as being too soft and lacking in the kind of dynamic energy that seems to get women going.

No, and I don't really have to list the reasons.

I do not deserve one.

I'm straight.

A mixture of circumstances and bad luck. At my first secondary school there were 85 boys and 15 girls. I watched some interesting and unlikely relationships form and break up, but the one girl I asked (actually my best friend had to ask her because my voice just totally disappeared at the crucial moment) turned me down. At my second one there were 200 pupils so the odds were a bit better, but I didn't really like any of the girls. There is a certain irony in that now, as an adult, I finally have the social tools to handle a teenage relationship, but for obvious reasons I can't have one. In all honesty I'm not sure how I would handle an adult relationship because I didn't have the practise when I was a teenager. It seems like walking into a Grade 8 violin exam when you're at Grade 3 standard, and being expected to give an adequate perfomance at that higher level. In general, though, the pattern which continues to this day is that the girls who I fancy don't fancy me and the ones who fancy me, I don't fancy. For now I'm enjoying being single and the fact I haven't had my heart broken. I have faith that I will find the right girl eventually, but it probably won't be for a while yet. Oh well, the longer I wait, the better it will be!

Weak social skills, social awkwardness. I never make the right move to women... Always fell to wrong, awkward ones that ends up in shame. I don't have any confidence or knowledge as in how to "get close" with women.

Have yet to figure out what else i could have done.

I've never had a girlfriend because of my poor social skills. Sure, I know how to get a girlfriend in theory, but the practical application throws me off.

Also, anxiety is a killer for me when it comes to starting relationships. I get cold feet a little too easily...

I've come close a few times but they all fizzled out before we could make it official.
The only time my Asperger's might have gotten in the way though was back in middle school when i had my first crush. I was kinda embarrassed, so I kept it to myself (apparently that's never a good idea). But somehow it still got out. Then again it could've just possibly been me being embarrassed/afraid (cause who isn't when that happens for the first time?)
She used to be a really good friend of mine. That was about 4 or 5 years ago. Now she just seems to ignore me. I guess I must've creeped her out or something. I don't know. She was one of the first people who saw through all my social awkwardness and recognize me for who I actually am. If it weren't for, I don't know where I'd be. It only still hurts now cause she essentially stabbed my back. She went from this nice little girl who actually seemed to care for me to this "who the hell are you?!" kinda thing.
Despite all that, i still wish I could repay the favor (of her helping me). Like I said, I don't know where I'd be without her. I went from your standard, run-of-the-mill, stereotypical aspie to someone who could actually function socially almost overnight, just because someone actually accepted and seemed to care for me. The funny thing was, once she started everyone else in my class also seemed to clean up their act. I don't know if it was because I was becoming more socially adept or if she set an example. Maybe both.
(whoa... didn't mean to rant like that...)
Anyway, as of right now, I kinda got me a girl back at home (I'm in college and she's a senior in high school). We haven't made it "official" yet but that doesn't look too far away. She makes me happy, which is about all I could ever ask from her.

In short, I've never had a girlfriend because of insecurity, fear of rejection, low self esteem, feeling unworthy of love, limited social skills, anxiety in social situations, lack of interest in other people, lack of things to say, Inability to be playful, Inability fake confidence well, moodiness, inability to hide mood, and a belief that I will fail if I try.
I could go and ask a girl I liked out, but all the other stuff would get in the way. I'd be lost in anxiety, insecurity, and paranoia; I'd be too preoccupied with my shaky self esteem and my fear/expectation of failure to have a good time. All this would increase the chance that a romantic experience would be unpleasant for me, and girls are good at perceiving these kinds of thing, so that would damage the experience for her as well.
And even if I got past all this, there's still the matter of impressing a perspective partner. In spite of my small gains over time, I'm in no shape to impress anyone in any broad way.
My romantic fantasy is a patient girl who cares enough about me to make me feel secure.

I knew a girl something like that once, but we were never on the same page at the same time.

Mainly just my shyness aswell as being pretty awkward at times as well as some bad experiences ,plus i tend to be pretty fussy,i've probably rejected something like 6+ girls,.

At least I know that there are so many other posters here who can't find a girlfriend besides me so I know I'm not alone in this.

I do miss some of the other posters though like SadApsy and Chummy (we both live in Israel).

My answer's "never" as well. It's down to a number of reasons, but suffice to say I've never rejected or turned anyone down either.

First off was simple shyness, which hits most people when they're in their teens.

At uni I was surrounded by a lot of couples, but didn't know many single people (weird, I know. That was just what my circle of friends was like).

After uni I was preoccupied with getting a 'proper' job.

I now live in a small town where there aren't many people my own age who I can 'connect' with.

It's part circumstances (I don't believe in luck but if I did, I'd say I've been unlucky) but also to do with my inability to pull my finger out and 'get out there' and meet people. I admit that it's at least partly my own responsibility.

I'm probably now in a better position emotionally because I've learned how to interact socially better than I could before, and I'm more mature/relaxed about the whole thing. On the downside I've been led on, lied to and rejected numerous times, which has made me a bit cynical and slow to trust people. If I'd had some positive experiences I might have a bigger incentive to do something about it but I have a real struggle between my tendancy to do 'cold logic' and my annoying habit of losing the all-important sense of perspective.

I'd like to think that I've learned from all those occasions where my self-confidence took a beating; I certainly know what to be wary of in others and what mistakes I'm likely to make. I'm sure "trial and error" is how EVERYONE learns how to do the relationships thing, but the number of chances I've had for that have been fewer and further between than average.

I haven't given up completely, but I'm not in a hurry to embarrass or inconvenience myself (or the person I'm attracted to!) either.

I panic when confronted with sex and that seems to be the only way any women that come around me want to start a relationship. most girls base the relationship on sex and its not something that i'm eager to do with someone i don't know so i can just never be on the same page. there's a girl right now that wants to f**k me but I'm too afraid to do it and screw it up in front of everyone I know because she's a 3rd party friend.