28 Sep 2020, 8:16 pm
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Not everyone use WP to kill time, actually....that's not the normal way for using it. 
A large part of my participating on WP is to express/exercise my creativity, discover more about human psychology, and clarify my thinking.
28 Sep 2020, 9:05 pm
Like a little butterfly....sits on a flower for a couple seconds then flies away 
28 Sep 2020, 10:36 pm
cyberdad wrote:
Like a little butterfly....sits on a flower for a couple seconds then flies away
You talking to me?
Actually,
More like a wise olf owl.
28 Sep 2020, 11:29 pm
Pepe wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
Like a little butterfly....sits on a flower for a couple seconds then flies away
You talking to me?
Actually,
More like a wise olf owl.
Miss butterfly probably sees us like a couple of old crows sitting on a telegraph pole
29 Sep 2020, 3:09 am
cyberdad wrote:
Pepe wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
Like a little butterfly....sits on a flower for a couple seconds then flies away
You talking to me?
Actually,
More like a wise olf owl.
Miss butterfly probably sees us like a couple of old crows sitting on a telegraph pole
Gotcha.
AspiePrincess611
Deinonychus
Joined: 5 Jun 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 354
Location: at the Mountains of Madness
29 Sep 2020, 12:13 pm
Pepe wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
hartzofspace wrote:
Pepe wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Well, as long you find the sex with him AMAZING then you will fall in love with him.
That's how you're programmed.
That's how you're programmed.
A gross generalisation, dude.
It definitely is!
It is our human biology, hormones.
We develop bonding from repetitive *enjoyable* sex with the same person.
It is also human nature for men, in particular, to want to move onto another conquest.
"7-year itch" sort of thing.
"Familiarity breeds a wandering eye", often. EEP!
Blame the evolutionary process.
I find it quite cruel that God, nature, evolution, or whatever you want to call it has created a species as full of these contradictions as humans are. Programmed to form bonds through mating behavior, but the male of the species is also programmed to move on to the next conquest and not be monogamous. We also have a much more complex brain and emotional response than other animals. It's like we are biologically set up to have our hearts broken. Relationships are set up to fail, if this is the reality. We should be one or the other - mating for life like doves, or just mate and not form bonds with partners - like chimpanzees, dogs, and other animals. But most peoples brains, as they are now, just won't allow this. This just reinforces my choice to "opt out" of the contradictory world of romantic relationships- at least for the time being. I'm one of those aspies who doesn't really "need" much human interaction most of the time, anyway.
The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,664
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
29 Sep 2020, 2:28 pm
AspiePrincess611 wrote:
Pepe wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
hartzofspace wrote:
Pepe wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Well, as long you find the sex with him AMAZING then you will fall in love with him.
That's how you're programmed.
That's how you're programmed.
A gross generalisation, dude.
It definitely is!
It is our human biology, hormones.
We develop bonding from repetitive *enjoyable* sex with the same person.
It is also human nature for men, in particular, to want to move onto another conquest.
"7-year itch" sort of thing.
"Familiarity breeds a wandering eye", often. EEP!
Blame the evolutionary process.
I find it quite cruel that God, nature, evolution, or whatever you want to call it has created a species as full of these contradictions as humans are. Programmed to form bonds through mating behavior, but the male of the species is also programmed to move on to the next conquest and not be monogamous. We also have a much more complex brain and emotional response than other animals. It's like we are biologically set up to have our hearts broken. Relationships are set up to fail, if this is the reality. We should be one or the other - mating for life like doves, or just mate and not form bonds with partners - like chimpanzees, dogs, and other animals. But most peoples brains, as they are now, just won't allow this. This just reinforces my choice to "opt out" of the contradictory world of romantic relationships- at least for the time being. I'm one of those aspies who doesn't really "need" much human interaction most of the time, anyway.
The female of our species haven't evolved from nor into monogamous either; but evolved via a different strategy. In case of women (in purely evolutionary context), the selection of the "next" mate happens at a slower pace and calculated differently.
I can explain more in detail but do you really....want me to open a can of worms?
Quote:
Relationships are set up to fail, if this is the reality.
Well, the #1 reason of divorce is marriage, duh.
AspiePrincess611
Deinonychus
Joined: 5 Jun 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 354
Location: at the Mountains of Madness
29 Sep 2020, 2:51 pm
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
The female of our species haven't evolved from nor into monogamous either; but evolved via a different strategy. In case of women (in purely evolutionary context), the selection of the "next" mate happens at a slower pace and calculated differently.
I can explain more in detail but do you really....want me to open a can of worms?
I can explain more in detail but do you really....want me to open a can of worms?
mrgreen wrote:
Well, the #1 reason of divorce is marriage, duh.
Nah, you're probably right - a full scientific explanation is probably unnecessary. I think there are exceptions to these rules of course - women who don't form attachments easily and men who do - and are content to stay faithful to their partners for life. Sadly, I feel that society's attitudes today do nothing to help people form lasting, meaningful relationships, although it seems that's what most people want. Again, contradictions. Being a human is crap, IMHO
29 Sep 2020, 3:30 pm
The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,664
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
29 Sep 2020, 3:57 pm
30 Sep 2020, 5:46 am
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I can explain more in detail but do you really....want me to open a can of worms?
No,
I'd prefer you to eat your lunch in solitary peace.
30 Sep 2020, 5:48 am
Donald Morton wrote:
I have always been a firm believer in that love is something that just happens or it doesn't. When you love someone you know and feel it in your heart. Over time you can come to admire and care for someone, but not love. Someone cannot be made to love you no matter how much you may try or how badly you want him or her to. That's just an idealist speaking.
From my experience, loving someone is a choice.
30 Sep 2020, 5:51 am
AspiePrincess611 wrote:
Nah, you're probably right - a full scientific explanation is probably unnecessary. I think there are exceptions to these rules of course - women who don't form attachments easily and men who do - and are content to stay faithful to their partners for life. Sadly, I feel that society's attitudes today do nothing to help people form lasting, meaningful relationships, although it seems that's what most people want. Again, contradictions. Being a human is crap, IMHO
Yep, most relationships are superficial.
Yep, being sentient and self-aware is crap.
30 Sep 2020, 5:59 am
AspiePrincess611 wrote:
Blame the evolutionary process.
I find it quite cruel that God, nature, evolution, or whatever you want to call it has created a species as full of these contradictions as humans are. Programmed to form bonds through mating behavior, but the male of the species is also programmed to move on to the next conquest and not be monogamous. We also have a much more complex brain and emotional response than other animals. It's like we are biologically set up to have our hearts broken. Relationships are set up to fail, if this is the reality. We should be one or the other - mating for life like doves, or just mate and not form bonds with partners - like chimpanzees, dogs, and other animals. But most peoples brains, as they are now, just won't allow this. This just reinforces my choice to "opt out" of the contradictory world of romantic relationships- at least for the time being. I'm one of those aspies who doesn't really "need" much human interaction most of the time, anyway.[/quote]
Yep, most relationships fail.
I have "opted out" also.
But there are still conflicting intellectual/biological/instinctual influences.
I have gone the middle road.
Rather than a romantic relationship, I favour a platonic one.
30 Sep 2020, 8:50 am
Pepe wrote:
Donald Morton wrote:
I have always been a firm believer in that love is something that just happens or it doesn't. When you love someone you know and feel it in your heart. Over time you can come to admire and care for someone, but not love. Someone cannot be made to love you no matter how much you may try or how badly you want him or her to. That's just an idealist speaking.
From my experience, loving someone is a choice.
Love is a combination of hormonal reaction (oxytocin release) and emotion. It is rather robotic to say that one chooses to love someone.
that1weirdgrrrl
Veteran
Joined: 19 Jul 2017
Age: 45
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,090
Location: Between my dreams and your fantasies
30 Sep 2020, 12:43 pm
Of course most relationships fail.
Otherwise everyone would stay with the first person they dated forever.
But most of us need to figure out who we are and what we want.
Most of us start dating long before we know ourselves.
Most of us start dating a person before we know them completely.
(And some people can keep unpleasant habits hidden for a while before allowing them to surface).
Staying in a bad relationship just because you don't want it to fail, is not a good idea.
So, yes, most relationships fail. But it's only logical.
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