I know this sounds funny coming from me, Mr. "I need a girlfriend now" but I've reconsidered my stance. Some of this might not apply to all of you, but I've read enough posts on the forum where it would apply to many of you, including myself, male or female.
Location can be blamed for lack of success and finding someone compatible, but unless you're living in the woods somewhere, it's a convenient excuse. I just have resented the fact that it's more like a job than actually having fun to seek out new opportunities that may lead to meeting new people. I've wanted quick results.
Right now, I'm working on starting a band...with no ulterior motives. Music is the closest thing I have to a special interest. It's what keeps me sane...listening to it and playing it (I play piano and guitar.) It's my dream to form a very good/great cover band that plays the songs I love and perform them for a crowd at a nice bar/pub/restaurant type of atmosphere. And now I'm finally doing it. Posting on craigslist and trying out musicians.
This is dually effective, since when I eventually get a gig, I will meet attractive women. Attractive women like to go out on friday or saturday nights and listen to live music that plays songs people know. And even if I don't meet anyone, I'm having just as much fun playing on stage anyway.
The other thing I'm doing is signing up for some classes next semester. Even if there are no "girls that are my type" in my class, I will make sure to sign up for subjects that genuinely interest me, so I'm enjoying myself anyway and have something to do.
The more stuff you do like this, the better position you put yourself out there to meet someone. You probably aren't going to meet anyone, at least anyone worthwhile, just going to work and home, for those of you who do work. And contrary to what TV shows tell you, people don't walk up to each other at supermarkets or malls and introduce themselves. Most people just mind their own business unless the person is so attractive/interesting looking to them that they feel they have to make a move or else they'll seriously regret it.
The other thing I realized is that no one NEEDS a boyfriend or a girlfriend. We want one. My reasons for wanting one are genuine and worthy, but still it's not like I'm so lonely that I NEED company from a female. I just want someone I find attractive to have conversations with, go out and dine with, have as the Scully to my Mulder, someone to take pictures together with and share memories with and someone that I might not agree with all the time but we both understand where we're coming from. Given all of that, I should be more patient, even though my standards are quite reasonable. And in the meantime, I might meet a girl who doesn't end up being "the one" but I have fun with nonetheless. What I'm not looking for, and I get the impression a lot of you aren't either, is intentional one night stands.
As much as I like to touch a woman's body and I'm sure sex is great, it's the company of a woman that I like, not taking my clothes off with a complete stranger.
24 Oct 2009, 10:25 pm
