Marriage Counseling

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My husband and I have decided to give it a try, and are looking for someone who understands AS/NT relationships.

Have you ever done couple's or marriage counseling? How well did it work for you? Were you able to find someone understanding of AS?

My Wife and i have seen a counsellor on and off for the pas year or so. Definitely helpful, particularly in helping with communication issues. Hes's the one who has suggested that i may have Aspergers, in fact it started as a joke as my behaviour obviously indicated AS, but the idea become serious the more we got into it. While this guy is no AS specialist, he is aware and has helped tremendously with our relationship.

Still not perfect, but we are getting there.

It might be tricky finding a counsellor who is AS aware, but that is an important step. We did see a 'usual' counsellor who was all about 'feelings' and 'communication', but that was a failure for obvious reasons. Just not AS compatible, and I automatically become the unfeeling evil 'man'.

Definitely do it, sometimes having an impartial 3rd party can make things so much easier. the trees become visible in the forest, and strategies can be established that can be tremendously helpful. Just find the right counsellor, and don't settle till you do.

Good luck

I'd definately try finding someone AS aware. My wife and I went to counseling (separately) for a couple months. The counsellor's opinion was that she was over-controlling and that if she backed off things would revert to a normal balance. Their sessions ended up being constant arguments.

We took the communication advice, quit going, and made things better on our own.

As a man, I'm very cautious of marriage counselors, and I'm single. Far too many of them simply take the wife's side with little or no attempt to get to the root of the problem. Almost makes you wonder if marriage counselors and divorce lawyers are working together behind the scenes.

Mr. Rath and I considered seeing someone to improve our communication. We were not in any type of crisis, but we have both had some counseling before and realize it's value. We sought out an aspie specialist and she told us that beginning with couples counseling is often contraindicated for aspie/nt relationships at first. She is a well known, published, specialist. She is working with Mr. Rath alone and I come in each few months if we need to discuss something.

The basic premise is that marital counseling functions on empathy and understanding. If there is a breakdown in that area, you can take a couple that is actually really doing well and only has a couple issues, and do more harm than good. So, you work on issues separately and then at some point you maybe come together.

Good luck.