Girls won't date me because of my small pecker. :(

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13 Jun 2011, 12:56 pm

Every time I ask a girl out, she rejects me because I have a small pecker. It could be someone I just freakin' met in the bookstore or something, who doesn't even know me, but as soon as she sees my pecker she thinks I'm a hopeless case. I can't get a date when I can't get beyond the pickup stage. Seriously, what the hell?

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AngelRho
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13 Jun 2011, 1:43 pm

LordoftheMonkeys wrote:

Um... Is this for real??? Exactly what is going on when you're trying to pick up girls? Are they asking you to drop your pants so they can check you out or something? You have some "try before you buy" kind of thing going on?

Dude, if you're just trying to get a date, that shouldn't even be an issue. I'd be, like, "Hey, you wanna go out?" She's like, "sure, but I need to see your pecker first." I'd be, like, "hell no, you ain't seein my pecker! You wanna go out or what?" If things are going well after 3 or 4 dates and she still wants to see/play with your pecker, just tell her you have a thing about lights being on and can you get things really dark first so she can't see anything. Spend more time on foreplay and she's not even gonna care about your pecker.

Unless, of course, you're a chicken breeder trying to date other chicken breeders who don't want to breed their chickens with a small cock. But, I mean, you can always go and buy a bigger cock, so I still don't see what that has to do with anything. I mean, why you bringing a chicken to a bookstore to pick up chicks?

AceOfSpades
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13 Jun 2011, 1:45 pm

Uh ok do you whip your dick out at the bookstore before you ask her to go out for some coffee sometime? How does she even get TMI at that stage?

Garath
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13 Jun 2011, 1:48 pm

I have a female "friend" with the funny and extremely scary ability to judge a guy's penis to within 1 cm of it's actual full length by having him stand up(him, not his penis, huhhuh) in front of her. Sure she's not right 100% of the time, but far more often that i'd like and far more often than i'd think you could get from guessing. Female intuition? is a scary thing.
That said I really hope this isn't for real, and if so i'm sorry >.<

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The_Face_of_Boo
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13 Jun 2011, 2:15 pm

Girls are afraid of me because I have a huge cock.

LiendaBalla
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13 Jun 2011, 2:19 pm

Ignorance + finding someone to blame= the usual.

alexptrans
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13 Jun 2011, 2:20 pm

My advice: try wearing pants next time you ask a girl out.

AceOfSpades
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13 Jun 2011, 2:21 pm

LiendaBalla wrote:

Ignorance + finding someone to blame= the usual.

Yeah it's like people resort to blame to make sense out of their confusion.

livinglearning
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13 Jun 2011, 2:30 pm

I can't remember ever laughing out loud while reading forum posts. That was great. Thanks for the laughs.

CockneyRebel
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13 Jun 2011, 2:51 pm

That was funny. :lol:

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starryeyedvoyager
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13 Jun 2011, 3:55 pm

AceOfSpades wrote:

Uh ok do you whip your dick out at the bookstore before you ask her to go out for some coffee sometime? How does she even get TMI at that stage?

That's exactly what I thought. Or, maybe you should stop using the addendum "... oh, and I have a small pecker, just fyi!" to your introduction.

I am not trying to make fun of you, but in all seriousness, how can that be an issue when it comes to dating. Not that I was an expert on dating (far, far from it), but doesn't the... well the genital stuff usually come AFTER dating? Or do you seriously think your questionable "reputation" of having a small penis has already spread to every single woman on earth. And trust me when I say that having a large penis is no guarantee to score a date, either.

nick007
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13 Jun 2011, 4:13 pm

You need to give up the idea of having sex & look for asexual girls OP

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johnsmcjohn
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13 Jun 2011, 4:14 pm

My advice would be to stop referring to your genitalia as "pecker." I am not a master pickup artist by any stretch of the imagination but I am fairly sure that women would not appreciate immaturity like that. You aren't in the second grade anymore.

Moog
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13 Jun 2011, 4:45 pm

johnsmcjohn wrote:

Call it your pee pee tube like I do

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nick007
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13 Jun 2011, 4:50 pm

You could try a radical pen!s enlarger

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0XrZ3i__T5M[/youtube]

Erisad
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13 Jun 2011, 4:51 pm

That's fantastic. :lol:

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