5 Real Life Places to Meet Singles

Post Reply New Topic

The internet seems easy but for anyone who's invested considerable time in OKCupid and other dating sites, it's obvious that meeting people and finding love is not as easy as it first seems. The bottom line for any relationship is that the in-person connection is mandatory. Many online relationships can transition beautifully over to real life. Others do not. Some people are so anxious about taking the next step that they never actually meet anyone they know online and the other person is left desperately wondering if their online partner is actually interested in them at all.

It's actually easier just to get out there and find someone in real life first. This might need more courage because you cannot hide as easily as you can on the internet but it is still easier and cuts out a lot of the bull that happens when you try to build a relationship online first. If this interests you and you think you're up to the challenge, consider these five options:

1. School. If you're not in college, consider taking night classes. You'll boost your degree while being placed in a room with several other adults, some of them being of the preferred sex. During class breaks, follow the group to the break room to participate in discussions, even if you're only laughing at other people's jokes.

2. Church. If you believe in something and there's a place of worship for it, go there routinely. Even if there's nobody in your romantic demographic in attendance, there's bound to be a grandma who thinks you'd be perfect for some single relative. Blind dates are rough but it'll get you into the dance and, who knows, one might be the right one.

3. Get a job. If your current place of work is romantically dead, pick up a part-time fluff position for the weekend... flipping burgers or bagging at the grocery store. It'll get you talking to a new batch of people and you can quit anytime with no harm to your actual career.

4. Volunteer. Soup kitchen, food pantries, homeless shelters... start doing something to help someone else. Not only will you be contributing to society, but you'll be in a positive position to meet new people and have them think well of you. Avoid volunteering at libraries. Only volunteer at animal shelters if there are considerable volunteers of the preferred sex there... otherwise, you'll just be spending your time with the animals (which is fun, but won't allow you to meet anyone).

5. Find a new hobby. Your current hobbies might not open you up to a good range of romantic prospects. To meet people of the preferred sex, you might have to broaden yourself to a new hobby so you can mix into a new group of people. Think about things you enjoy and see if there's existing activities that allow for fun mash-ups. (for example: Technology + Outdoors = Geocaching... Orienteering + Stamping = Letterboxing... Photography + Animals = Birding or Nature Photography) You don't need to know everything about a new hobby to start it. What a great way to meet people if you ask them for help.

What do all these places have in common? They all have structure. It's not like meeting someone on the street, these are all places where you go back for Round 2, and the other person is still there, giving you an excuse to talk to them. Random encounters are very tough for anyone to navigate.

Random street approaches sound very complicated because they involve quick thinking, wit and charisma.

I don't have any of those, so the so called "day game" opportunity is instantly gone for me.

All I have left are the before mentioned places.

Hobbies, volunteering and school.

Sometimes people hook up and live happily ever after from meeting on the subway, bus, street, grocery store or bar, but I think it's safer and saner to consider those to be rare exceptions rather than someone try to engineer a love connection for themselves in those places.

I can tell you from experience that the church option does not work... There's nobody my age around, and no grandmothers are itching to introduce me to anyone.

It's important to get to know people well in such situations - nothing worse than getting involved with someone at work just to have the relationship go wrong and have them bad-mouth you to the whole work-place/church/school...says the voice of mixed experience.

As Mindslave said, they all have structure, it allows you to get to know people and vice versa as well as test the water or let things develop naturally without the focus on something happening or pressure on you to make things happen, it allows you to get a feel of the person so if you're level-headed (or even if you're not) chances are things will go well. In my opinion this is without a doubt the best way to go about relationships, all these places are far more likely to have you find a mate than anything else.

I would recommend being extremely careful about trying to date someone at work. Your job might could be in jeopardy if they are problems. I made the horrible mistake of asking out a couple women from work before & they got very offended & went out of their way to make my job difficult when they could till they quit. If you are in a position when you see the person regularly & cant easily avoid em if there's a problem; beware of potential risk

This is something that will vary between differing cultures and countries. I'd be careful of mass generalising advice.

For example, I'd love to see Face_of_boo try and hook up with someone in a mosque

Church's in a UK context, bad idea, simply put UK families don't work like that and outside of the main denominations of christianity you have sect's who to be quite blunt, prey on the weak and vulnerable of society in order to bolster their membership. The Jesus Army are one such example of an organisation. But also the Jehovah's who's hall is located up the road from me have an entire charity based in my town dedicated to people they have cast out for various reasons and denied any access or support from their families

Jobs. Blimey, in nursing or any healthcare job were you are a responsible practitioner relationships are just more trouble than they are worth. With clients/patients/service users whatever you want to call them major no go and could put you in breach of your professional code of conduct. In the workplace it can open a can of worms, it encourages nepotism and corruption. I've been in a work place where 90% of the management were practically all in bed with each other and when "stuff" happened they all banded together like flies around crap to protect themselves as a collective.

In an office of clerks and administrators i'm sure its swell. In a professional context were your personal and professional integrity is on the line, maybe not the coolest place to be finding sources of nookie.

You know there are fundamental differences with the entire processes of how people meet and hook up together in differing cultures and I think you have to go right down to that level first before you look at what places would attract like minded people. Because those places will vary from culture to culture and from country to country