what according to you is more important in a relationship?

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Intellectual stimulation or emotional attachement? and why?

I don't know which one to choose myself but I am leaning towards intellectual stimulation.

Last edited by pree10shun on 14 Aug 2011, 5:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I chose intellectual, because if I can't have a stimulating convo with a guy, there isn't going to be a whole lot more! Also, being intellectually compatible means that the emotional attachment soon follows. As they say, "Talk Nerdy to me!"

It has to be intellectual stimulation!

A couple of years ago I was talking to a theoretical physicist who works at CERN. The guy was short, overweight, bearded and in his 60's... but by the time he'd explained to me why there have to 13-Dimensions in the Universe, I was just about ready to rip his clothes of there and then

Talk physics to me baby, oh yeah!

Emotional attachment.

That said, if a girl can't keep up her end of a conversation, the emotional bit would go away. And talking nerdy would make it come back.

Emotional, but the meotional has a foundation of intellectual too. But The emotional is what makes it a relationship and not just friendship.

Emotional attachment.

Intellectual stimulation is hot but without emotional attachment it's not enough for a relationship. However, without any intellectual stimulation the emotional attachment would most likely fade soon.

Both are very important to me, but I place priority on emotional attachment, personally as it is required to take something to the level of a relationship, and certainly, marriage, but that is my opinion.

its easy for people on the spectrum to value intellect over emotions, and see emotions as useless, but in a relationship, personally, i think emotional is just as important as intellectual in my perspective.

theres no law in the world stating that they are mutually exclusive. some people have none, some have both.

of course intelligence is highly valued, but i'd rather have a person of average intelligence and above average emotional connection rather than vice-versa.

a person i can have an intelligent discussion with is a friend. but if theres no emotional intimacy, its not a relationship

Intellectual Stimulation. The brain is the most significant sex gland in the body.

I never could understand the appeal of the stereotypical "Dumb Blonde" - what can you talk about with someone whose only attractive assets are physical? What happens when the physical appeal wears off, and there is only the emotional attachment to keep you together?

Both and

I'd prefer to have both, and in a relationship they do really kind of depend on each other. You can have an intellectual relationship with someone else, but in that case the other person simply becomes a second opinion for which you test your own ideas against. If it was pure emotional, you would not have much to talk about with each other and that emotional attachment will have nothing to stem from other than simple primal physical lust. I don't like to single out favorites in stuff like this, because in the end you need both sides or it won't be a very long lasting and fulfilling relationship.

If there's no emotional attachment, it's a pretty lame relationship. If you want intellectual stimulation, that's what friends are for. It does help in a relationship, but it is required less to make one work.

I can't have a relationship with only intellectual stimulation. Because to me, that's not a relationship. Of course I would like it, as in my opinion it makes someone a better catch, but it's not required as much.

I chose intellectual stimulation because emotional attachment is sine qua non to a relationship and therefore intellectual stimulation is the only possible choice.

Is that Aspie of me or what?

Emotional attachment, otherwise it wouldn't be a relationship.

I was thinking exactly the same thing. Hey! We oughta start a whole forum for people like us! We could call it Wrong...

Nevermind.

Seriously, though, I choose 100% intellectual stimulation because if I have that the emotional attachment can (and will) follow. It just cannot work in the other direction for me.

I can't have emotional attachment without intellectual stimulation. But I don't think the intellectual stimulation is otherwise more important. It's just if there isn't intellectual stimulation there isn't the possibility of emotional attachment, so I guess it has to be intellectual stimulation.

At the aspie conference I went to in the relationships talk thingy we were being asked to list traits we'd want in a partner, and I gave the word "competence", she laughed and said "Yeah, you're definitely an aspie all right"