Do Aspie girls fall in love quickly?

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What's most people's opinion on this (I know it's a broad question), but I was thinking about how I perceive potential partners... I tend to analyze and usually it's too late by the time I make my decision. What's it like from the female perspective?

I can only speak for myself and a couple of my friends... but for me (who has 'mild' Asperger's) I tend to 'fall in love' slower than most of my friends? It's probably because I'm not as crazy about the idea of falling in love as my friends- it's not a big deal to me, if it happens it happens. This stance is pretty different than many of my teenage girl friends. ^^ As for other aspie girls I know (all teens) one doesn't give a crap and the other is friendly and a bit boy-crazy. What I'm trying to say, I guess, is that everyone is different, Aspie or not, and lumping people together like that is just going to end up making you look silly. And wrong. I see where you are coming from, though. ;p

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So apparently I have "a very small trace of Aspergers?". Yeah, not sure what that means. But hey, any help I can give I will.

Glad to meet to you all!

I just turned 39 and I have never truly fallen in love. And I don't really care if I never do, in fact I hope I don't. Happy Un-Valentine's Day, everyone.

I'd say I'm just really choosy, so it's not so much a matter of speed. I don't develop crushes frequently, but occasionally it happens. I followed through on my last crush and lucky for me, he accepted.

I think this depends mostly on age and the individual person. When I was in my early teens, I had very frequent crushes that would develop in a matter of days. As I've gotten older, crushes have become progressively less frequent and slower develop. I'll have one crush a year or less, and those feeling usually take a few months to fully develop. I think most people have crushes less frequently in their adult years than in their early teens when they first start developing romantic interests.

Crushes can be almost instantaneous but loving someone is something that grows over a much, much longer period of time.

I'm confused with love and obsession.

I think that may due to all of the unrealistic expectations that we are given to us when we are children. I mean we are more naive so we are more likely to be in love with the idea of being love, not actually being in love.

I tend to be extremely selective about the kind of man I date, so I generally have a much stronger attraction to them than I would if I just dated anyone. I guess this tends to lead me to be able to fall in love quicker, but in general, it takes time for me to build trust and be ready to be emotionally intimate and vulnerable.

rabidmoney4642 but wouldn't a crush just last a little while? A few months, tops?

I've never fallen in love and I don't think I ever could. My first boyfriend was picked after careful analysis when I was 17. But I don't believe in falling in love. It's all about successful cohabitation and compatibility.

I dont think so. So I know the feeling of physical attraction, so I can have the wish to be physical with someone after knowing only a short time. But this "love thing on the first sight" is just an imagination of NTs in my eye, that do not want to face themself, that they are only physical horny about someone. I mean how can I be in love with someone I dont even know yet? How can I have a desire to have an relationship with a person I dont know yet? Why should I have an desire to have a partnership with an unknown person? Thats why I also would never give in into an unknown person, telling me to be interested about meeting with me. Because if someone doesnt know me, how can there be an interest to spend time with me? I also do not know the general need of an relationship. So I never had the feeling, that I would want to have an relationship as long as there is no special person linked to this desire. I dont want to have a partner only to have a partner or because of self esteem issues telling me to have a low worth, because of not having a partner. I gave into this, when I was a teenager, following my classmates, but had to accept that it didnt function, because I only got annoyed from the expectations I had to fulfill of being in an relationship. So I only was horny, but had no need of an relationship. ^^ While on the other side, I felt myself guilty because of not feeling the way I should and hurting my partner with it. After these experiences I accepted that all of that flirting stuff dont function with me. The person I actually do have a partnership now, I knew for over a year as normal friend before and from my side I only wanted to have a friendship with benefits first, so the desire for a real partnership was from his side. From my side, I would have still needed some time to go that way but luckily everything went well.

[quote]It's all about successful cohabitation and compatibility.[quote] I completely agree. I think that what people tell themselves to be "love on the first sight" is nothing more but some really good matching hormones and pheromones of two persons, linked with the own physical desire for sex, and some physical signs of the opposite that are signs of good fertility. So the brain gets the informations, it decides that the opposite would be a good matching partners due to DNA and immune systems, so it starts to spend pheromones, which leads to the person being happy while meeting the other person. And because many people feel themself of the mental crown of evolution, the deny themself of having such normal basic physical desires and instead invent the "love on the first sight" thing. I see nothing bad about normal body processes, that are part of us as everything else, but all that fairytales expectations linked to them really annoy me.

So "real love" is also nothing more then based on hormones and so on, and is a part of us, that ensures our stability as group and helps us that our children and clans have better chances to survive. I dont see, why i should deny this, because accetping this doesnt mean that I still cant be happy.

YES!! ! Then you have to pay the piper.

I can fall into obsessive "love" quite fast but any potential healthy attachments take time for me. When I develop an obsession, i fall into some sorta unreal misperception and it sucks.