The valkyrie next door

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So I live next door to one of the valkyries. The lady seems really volatile but for some reason I just find her really interesting. I would like to approach her to talk maybe have coffee but the problem is that the first words she said to me were "can you not walk across my lawn!" so I have no idea how to approach her or whether I even should.

Maybe this is some sort of romantic kamikaze run I dont know but she seems lonely so perhaps we could strike up a friendship. For some reason I have an odd instinctual feeling that its worth pursuing and I NEVER get that feeling.

don't, she sounds incredibly picky and perfectionist/neat freaky. Or just plain territorial.

A valkyrie? Really?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YC6f8FbnVMQ[/youtube]

You could always hire a professional dominatrix to yell at you.

Maybe go over there (not across the lawn) and say you feel you got off on the wrong foot.

...

Sounds like a cunning plan

I was considering mowing her lawn at the crack of dawn as a good faith gesture. I could even plant some shrubs. The worst that will happen is a fatal wound inflicted by a gardening implement

I was actually going to go and say exactly what you recommended but what pretext? I mean her response is likely to be something along the lines of "and?"

1. Swagger across lawn.

2. Scratch balls.

3. "Ayyyy bish, you know you want me."

Please...don't mow her lawn! LOL

She sounds like she's very compulsive about her lawn; moreover, you are invading her property

If you want someone to inflict pain on your genitals, this is again something a dominatrix can do.

The line is just an excuse to start a conversation. You could go anywhere you feel like from there, including inviting her out for coffee.

Hmm again that wasn't part of the original agenda but by the old crone's wart ridden hide its a good idea!

Yes but if I simply get "Just dont do it again" should I take that as evidence that a hasty retreat is best or should I press on? At what point will these advances constitute harassment/creepiness also?

Do not mow her lawn,you may mow down something she's planted.The last thing you want to do is piss off a Valkyrie.I know this because my daughter is one.
If she has flowers or shrubs in the yard start off a conversation asking her about them,gardeners love talking about their plants.

Wear like Thor and she'll fly in your bed.