Really tough spot.

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Hello,
(new user by the way) I have been glaring through this forum for awhile and have found some insight, but I think that I might need to post in order to ask a specific question. I am 17 years old, homeschooled since 5th grade, have moved around a few times, and don't really have "normal" hobbies. (well if finance (among other things) is, then that is news to me) In addition, I would normally ask my dad, but he has passed. I also live in a town of less than 15,000 (I know it could be worst) which does not allow anything that would help (retirement community). I have managed, picking up a friend or two that I drop in on once in awhile. I am also seeing a counselor for suggestion. In addition I have talked to my pastor (he was very little help). So now that I have provided a background I will ask my question: how am I supposed to make friends or get a date with the problems I have and have unique views and hobbies? Also, I have tried to socialize and mingle, but it just is not working out (my problems are mostly with the opposite sex). I have tried youth groups, myyearbook, etc. to no avail. I am kind of flustered. Thanks

Hmmm from what little you've really put, I think you should just keep at it even tho most the time it will probably feel like you're peeing against the wind. Some progress is better then no progress.

Maybe see the friends you only drop in to see a little more and get to know people they know. Once you get to know more people everything else tends to fall into place by itself.

I wouldn't worry about the opposite sex to much (Obviously don't just ignore them), I'd work on getting some "wingmen" first (They can be invaluable to spread the word on how awesome you are especially at 17)

As for your hobbies, if you find them interesting there's usually always someone else who'll find them equally as interesting.

Welcome by the way

I live in a place that has a population of 2'000, you could start making plans to move to a city or somewhere that has more activities going on. I would say enquire about local events in your areas, walks, marathons or even charity events that may be taking place, they can be a great way to get to know other people.

Also work on your social skills, there isn't an easy way to do this on a spectrum but just socialize and try observe closely how other people respond to each other.

This e-book has some good tips regarding socializing and different aspects of being on the spectrum.
http://www-users.cs.york.ac.uk/~alistair/survival/

...Hm...........

What, specifically, are your "unique" views?

What, specifically, are your non-normal hobbies?

The specifics matter.

How far away is the nearest bigger town/city?

This thread is nearly 3 years old.

I think before you think of dating, you should just focus on improving your social skills and becoming more accustom to how to socialize with people in general. It's a lot like driving. If close personal relationships were formula 1 cars, you can't just jump into a formula one car and drive it. You have to take drivings ed, then take a written test, then take drivers training, then a driving test, then practice driving, then practice driving faster cars, then take a technical driving course, and practice on a track, and so on, until your skills are sufficiently developed to drive the formula 1 car.

When I was your age, I really had little idea of how people socialize in general, and I started learning how to socialize on internet chatrooms and expanded that to real life. Here are some things I learned.

1. Greet people when you first encounter them and ask them how they are.
2. If someone asks you how you are, and you are not well, you can indicate this briefly but avoid elaborating unless they prompt you to do.

3. Avoid monologues. Conversations should be like passing a ball back and forth. Person A says something, person B contributes something in response.

4. Try to choose subjects that are relevant to both parties involved in the conversation.

5. If you know you have difficulty reading non-verbal body language, try to pay particularly close attention to their non-verbal body language, provided you can do this without looking strange.

Here are some additional tips.
1. People your age are often insecure with themselves. Even, and probably especially, those cool kids. After you feel you have familiarized yourself with the basics of socialization, don't be afraid to be a little outgoing in social settings. Most people at your age spend more time worrying about others judging them than actually judging other people.

2. Socialization may seem very arbitrary at first but it isn't. If you watch closely and analyze social interactions you will eventually see patterns and rules arise.

3. Taking up a hobby like creative writing or acting might help you by forcing you to think about how others will respond in certain social situations, and why.

4. Sometimes you will upset people. Sometimes it will be your fault, and sometimes it will be their fault. This is completely normal. You can't control how others respond to you and you can't always control your emotions but you can make choices of how you respond in return. When you are in the wrong, it can be a very difficult thing to admit but admitting to it and apologizing can go a long way in repairing relationships and will ultimately relieve you of an uncomfortable burden. It also demonstrates likeable personality traits such as strong moral character, justness, and self confidence.

5. At some point in your life you will experience rejection of one type or another. It can be upsetting, but sometimes this is a favor in disguise because it can spare you from being placed into situations or relationships with people where there is a mutual incompatibility.

6. Sometimes you might feel alone. You are not. We are here.