Canary wrote:
I've been seeing someone for about a week, and while there's nothing wrong with him I'm often more anxious than not trying to feel things out.
How often is it normal for two introverts to talk? How often should we be seeing each other? How fast should different aspects of the relationship be moving? I have no idea what to think of any of this, or what anything means anymore. I've been wrong about everyone else I've dated.
In the past, people lose interest once the newness wears off, once things start to get hard, or once (if they're younger men) they realize a relationship requires work and time. It's been so easy for me to just not matter. I know I'm nothing out of the ordinary. I'm nothing people brag about and I'm not in anyone's wishlist on a forum.
Who's to say it's not the same here? How can I know that every lapse in communication isn't a sign that, now that I'm no longer a mystery, he's getting bored? How do "normal people" handle relationships and trust, let alone in a serious relationship or marriage, when you can know so little about what someone is really thinking or feeling?
Each relationship is different depending on the people. You can see as little or as much of each other as you both are comfortable with there are no set rules.
Honestay all your worries are what NTs and aspies alike feel. I still feel that way about my relationship sometimes (like he will get bored). With my relationship I have found that when we aren't discussing stuff openly and when I'm trying to 'read' him then our relationships struggle.
Every relationship whether it be NT or ND or a mixture needs open communication so just ask him. Also have a bit more confidence in yourself I'm not anyone on here's wishlist either