12 Jun 2018, 5:50 pm
I'm pretty inexperienced with relationship stuff. I've had a few boyfriends but I never did anything past making out with any of them. (Yes, I'm a teenager). I've been diagnosed with AS since I was a kid, and although I've had problems with certain textures (velvet, corduroy, fleece, and similar), sensory issues have never been a thing for me until recently.
I've been having more and more difficulty lately with kissing. About halfway through my second boyfriend, I stopped being able to kiss him because I would get panicked and I would get this really painful stabbing pain on the back of my neck. I tried kissing from all sorts of angles and it was still there, so it must have been from stress. Two boyfriends later I still have this problem, and I can't seem to maintain a relationship because of it. Especially when I kiss or even hold hands with a boy for the first time, it feels like my body is on fire and I can't concentrate. Unlike my sensory issues with velvet, this feels really emotional, something that's in my whole body and not just in the part of my body that's touching the thing/person.
I also seem to lose interest in boys the minute I've confirmed that they're interested in me, and these two things combine to make it pretty much impossible for me to have relationships, since I can't be emotionally interested and any physical interest I have is thwarted by these weird neck pains and sensory overload like symptoms.
Has anybody else experienced anything like this? Does anyone have tips or advice? I'd really appreciate it 
